Anonymous wrote:Flossing and bidet

That's funny. We bought a house in DC for $325. It came with a bidet. My DD is 10 at the end of the month. She flosses morning and night and uses the bidet before her shower. (I do too). We are TRULY not upperclass-but... she can roll with the best of them. Private school, private violin lessons, ballet lessons and swim team. Well-traveled with a passport since she was 22 months old. 3 cruises and ski vacations-out west. I always think-who is this AA child going to marry.

So-not sure that the bidet and flossing make one upper class-at least not in my house-but it does make you cultured. We are well-rounded and cultured.

Several generations attend the same boarding schools. College buildings or libraries named after some great great grandparent. Summer place off the coast of Maine, on the Vineyard, or on the Cape, that's been in the family for generations. Knows what a first cousin once removed is. Social register. Green Book. Wedding announcement ( or maybe just parents and grandparents wedding announcements) in the New York Times. Foreign travel - especially Europe. Foreign languages. Emphasis on education and the arts. Fondness for alcohol. Mental illness or eccentricity in the extended family. Certain club and board memberships. Field hockey. Lacrosse. Squash. Tennis. Skiing. Golf. Sailing. Crew. Horses. Ice hockey. Good table manners. Stiff upper lip. High expectations. Quiet confidence. security. May very well wear old clothes and drive old cars and wear little jewelry. Little conspicuous consumption. Treat others with respect. Grace.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All the old money types I've known (and I've known many having grown up in and now living in one of their enclaves) have a refreshing touch of crazy/eccentricity and dress entirely as they please -- 30 year old sweaters, dog/cat hair and all, roots showing and all.

I was just going to say this. Old money wears muck boots and no makeup because they've just come from the barn. The only jewelry is usually a slim wedding band and maybe small stud earrings. LL Bean totes. Non-flashy SUV, usually muddy. Summer home that's been in the family for generations and is rarely spoken about because it just "is". Old money doesn't care how they appear to others because they don't need to care. They're not wannabes or strivers.

Exactly this. And as for dress...not flashy. Understated class. No logos (think those tacky handbags with the label or symbol plastered all over 100x...no way.). They would never talk about money.

This. And boarding school.

P.s. I love this thread.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All the old money types I've known (and I've known many having grown up in and now living in one of their enclaves) have a refreshing touch of crazy/eccentricity and dress entirely as they please -- 30 year old sweaters, dog/cat hair and all, roots showing and all.

I was just going to say this. Old money wears muck boots and no makeup because they've just come from the barn. The only jewelry is usually a slim wedding band and maybe small stud earrings. LL Bean totes. Non-flashy SUV, usually muddy. Summer home that's been in the family for generations and is rarely spoken about because it just "is". Old money doesn't care how they appear to others because they don't need to care. They're not wannabes or strivers.

Exactly this. And as for dress...not flashy. Understated class. No logos (think those tacky handbags with the label or symbol plastered all over 100x...no way.). They would never talk about money.

Anonymous wrote:All the old money types I've known (and I've known many having grown up in and now living in one of their enclaves) have a refreshing touch of crazy/eccentricity and dress entirely as they please -- 30 year old sweaters, dog/cat hair and all, roots showing and all.

I was just going to say this. Old money wears muck boots and no makeup because they've just come from the barn. The only jewelry is usually a slim wedding band and maybe small stud earrings. LL Bean totes. Non-flashy SUV, usually muddy. Summer home that's been in the family for generations and is rarely spoken about because it just "is". Old money doesn't care how they appear to others because they don't need to care. They're not wannabes or strivers.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There are NO upper class people in the USA.

Its a "classless" society built on economy and self-advancement.

You need to go to Europe to find the dwindling Upper Classes.

actually scholars are saying now the the United States is more stratified than Europe. Used to be the other way around but apparently there's more upward mobility in Europe these days.

Exactly. upward mobility does not equate with upper class. Its a nouveux riche situation.

Nouveau

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm not talking about money; talking about class.

OK, defined as...?

People who are well bred and raised.

Poor people can be well bred and raised too....

Truth.

I think it's not so much a habit or outwardly observable characteristic as having an air of detached ease - no matter what's going on, IME members of the upper class don't get too excited and seem totally "above" it all. Not in a snobby or obnoxious way - I think its subconscious. Probably born of being always confident in one's future and the certainty of having a comfortable life...forever.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm not talking about money; talking about class.

OK, defined as...?

People who are well bred and raised.

Poor people can be well bred and raised too....

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There are NO upper class people in the USA.

Its a "classless" society built on economy and self-advancement.

You need to go to Europe to find the dwindling Upper Classes.

actually scholars are saying now the the United States is more stratified than Europe. Used to be the other way around but apparently there's more upward mobility in Europe these days.

Exactly. upward mobility does not equate with upper class. Its a nouveux riche situation.

Anonymous wrote:There are NO upper class people in the USA.

Its a "classless" society built on economy and self-advancement.

You need to go to Europe to find the dwindling Upper Classes.

actually scholars are saying now the the United States is more stratified than Europe. Used to be the other way around but apparently there's more upward mobility in Europe these days.

Anonymous wrote:Buy quality and keep it forever (clothes, shoes, cars).

Have nicknames for really common names like John and Elizabeth that sound like "Shep", "Biffy", and "Trip". Use the same 5 names over and over again every generation.

Lots of alcohol and very little food at parties.

I have to laugh at this one. I never thought about it, but my extended family seems to only use two/three names. We've always joked about how upset my dad was because I didn't name my son the same. And yes, they all have nicknames - we'd never know who anyone was referring to otherwise.

With re. to children:

Boarding school
Tennis, golf, horseback-riding lessons
Music lessons
Travel

IME, hygiene was hit or miss, manners hit or miss, but everyone seemed to know how to play the piano and play a decent game of tennis, even if they never mentioned such before. Also, almost all go to boarding school for HS if they grew up on the East Coast, but not necessarily if they grew up on the West Coast or Midwest.

There are NO upper class people in the USA.

Its a "classless" society built on economy and self-advancement.

You need to go to Europe to find the dwindling Upper Classes.

Upper class people do not negotiate the price of a mattress or have niece named Chantilly Lace