Anonymous
Post 06/19/2015 00:28     Subject: Re:If your 1st grade daughter won the "fashionista" award at school...

Anonymous wrote:I would be a little miffed. I've spent many years trying to teach mine that "It's what's on the inside that counts" and "We don't judge people's bodies and appearance," etc., and then they get recognized for appearance. Did any boys receive similar award recognition for their looks?


Fashionista is not about her appearance. It is about style. Two different things. You can be a plain jane or jim, and have an impeccable sense of style. And you can be gorgeous and have no sense of style, proportion, artistry, color and balance. Fashionista indicates a skill that has nothing to do with physical appearance..
Anonymous
Post 06/18/2015 23:08     Subject: Re:If your 1st grade daughter won the "fashionista" award at school...

I would be a little miffed. I've spent many years trying to teach mine that "It's what's on the inside that counts" and "We don't judge people's bodies and appearance," etc., and then they get recognized for appearance. Did any boys receive similar award recognition for their looks?
Anonymous
Post 06/18/2015 23:04     Subject: Re:If your 1st grade daughter won the "fashionista" award at school...

Anonymous wrote:Blonde hair (especially white blonde) is ugly to me so I disagree with the "typically pretty" comment. Very narrow-minded. I especially dislike long blonde hair because it is usually very thin.

It really creeps me out that the kid and her mom think that her hair color is something important. I get the individual sense of style but not the hair color.



New poster here but i have a daughter with long blond hair and am brunette myself and have 2 other brunette daughters.
My blond daughter gets 10 times the attention then my 2 dark haired daughters do (not male attention as they're all in elementary school but just attention period)
People are obsessed with blond hair. They are continually commenting on it.
I never knew this (as someone with dark hair).
It's sort of freaky actually.
Anonymous
Post 06/18/2015 23:00     Subject: Re:If your 1st grade daughter won the "fashionista" award at school...

Blonde hair (especially white blonde) is ugly to me so I disagree with the "typically pretty" comment. Very narrow-minded. I especially dislike long blonde hair because it is usually very thin.

It really creeps me out that the kid and her mom think that her hair color is something important. I get the individual sense of style but not the hair color.
Anonymous
Post 06/18/2015 22:03     Subject: Re:If your 1st grade daughter won the "fashionista" award at school...

Anonymous wrote:
Not PP, but blonde hair is typically very pretty. Nothing wrong with that. PP's kid can be smart and pretty.


And other colors of hair are not pretty? So, how do the girls who were born without this hair feel? Uglier?

And isn't beauty about a bit more than hair?

I feel sorry for a girl who is getting her sense of self from her hair.


Saying "blonde hair is typically very pretty" is not saying "all hair but blonde is ugly" or "beauty is all about blonde hair" or "girls should get their self esteem from their hair, which if its blonde is the prettiest"

It is just saying, blonde hair is typically very pretty. And there is nothing wrong with that. Because you can be both smart and pretty.
Anonymous
Post 06/18/2015 22:00     Subject: Re:If your 1st grade daughter won the "fashionista" award at school...

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Maybe the teachers are just trying to reflect back to the kids that they are really listening to them and are hearing what's important to them. Our daughter's teacher does this about her interest in fashion and I think it's great. Her teacher last year picks up on what's important to kids and includes it in their birthday celebration. For our daughter, her teacher last year also mused that the world became a lot funnier and a lot blonder the day she was born. She loved it. She 's also in to top math and reading groups, and had a very close to perfect (all 9th stanine) ERB report. She cares, though, about being fun, and loves playing with her very blond long hair very dramatically while playing pretend games. Same thing with her red-haired close friend.


I can't believe you think it is great that the teacher commented on her blondeness or that you think it is cute that she dramatically plays with her "long, blond (sic) hair." Why exactly did you feel the need to mention that she is a blonde two times? Why is her hair color something important to her that the teacher picked up on?


PP here. My DD's hair is a bright yellow/ white shade of blonde, and it's long, curly and think. People comment on it all the time, as they do with her bright red-haired friend when they are together. Her hair color and style is something she identifies with, and her teacher are remarking on it in a very nice way. It's not that I think it's "cute." It's that I'm glad her teachers know her, and thinks out what's important to her.


Is your daughter's hair color and style really the most important thing to her? You might want to work on finding a new area of strength so that her identity is not wrapped up in something so trivial/temporary.


No, if you read what I wrote, she's really into fashion, which she enjoys and I think is great . Someone asked why I mentioned her hair color. It's because it is distinctive in brightness and length and she enjoys it in her pretend play. People very often comment about it, and I'm glad she sees if as something positive and that she has fun with it. God, does everything have to be about her intellect. She tests at the top of the charts, dies very well in class, and also has other, more playful, artistic and silly interests. I'm glad teachers see that about her too. She feels known and seen. And as far as someone saying caring about her hair us superficial I have a few thoughts. First, she works to take care if it ( long, thick and full of knots). Second, it's very distinctive and she has chosen to make it something she owns and has embraced. I'm all for that. Third, I think it's important to care for how you look. It is not more important than other characteristics, but good grooming is important. Nothing wrong with that. And certainly nothing wrong with her interest in fashion. Given all the academic pressures and expectations, I'll take her interest in fashion and hair as a good sign. You may feel differently, but I know my DD. She knows she works hard and that she's very smart. I'm glad her teachers let her know that they also see her more playful side.
Anonymous
Post 06/18/2015 21:59     Subject: If your 1st grade daughter won the "fashionista" award at school...

And less on hair too.
Anonymous
Post 06/18/2015 21:58     Subject: If your 1st grade daughter won the "fashionista" award at school...

I'd spend less time next year focusing on clothes and more time doing math.

Seriously.
Anonymous
Post 06/18/2015 21:49     Subject: If your 1st grade daughter won the "fashionista" award at school...

Yeah....as someone who had gorgeous golden hair as a little girl, that then darkened and coarsened up in my teen years, I'd focus on something less mercurial. Also, I was *proud* of my hair, which is stupid, and more than a little bit problemmatic.
Anonymous
Post 06/18/2015 21:46     Subject: Re:If your 1st grade daughter won the "fashionista" award at school...

Not PP, but blonde hair is typically very pretty. Nothing wrong with that. PP's kid can be smart and pretty.


And other colors of hair are not pretty? So, how do the girls who were born without this hair feel? Uglier?

And isn't beauty about a bit more than hair?

I feel sorry for a girl who is getting her sense of self from her hair.
Anonymous
Post 06/18/2015 20:45     Subject: Re:If your 1st grade daughter won the "fashionista" award at school...

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Maybe the teachers are just trying to reflect back to the kids that they are really listening to them and are hearing what's important to them. Our daughter's teacher does this about her interest in fashion and I think it's great. Her teacher last year picks up on what's important to kids and includes it in their birthday celebration. For our daughter, her teacher last year also mused that the world became a lot funnier and a lot blonder the day she was born. She loved it. She 's also in to top math and reading groups, and had a very close to perfect (all 9th stanine) ERB report. She cares, though, about being fun, and loves playing with her very blond long hair very dramatically while playing pretend games. Same thing with her red-haired close friend.


I can't believe you think it is great that the teacher commented on her blondeness or that you think it is cute that she dramatically plays with her "long, blond (sic) hair." Why exactly did you feel the need to mention that she is a blonde two times? Why is her hair color something important to her that the teacher picked up on?


PP here. My DD's hair is a bright yellow/ white shade of blonde, and it's long, curly and think. People comment on it all the time, as they do with her bright red-haired friend when they are together. Her hair color and style is something she identifies with, and her teacher are remarking on it in a very nice way. It's not that I think it's "cute." It's that I'm glad her teachers know her, and thinks out what's important to her.


Is your daughter's hair color and style really the most important thing to her? You might want to work on finding a new area of strength so that her identity is not wrapped up in something so trivial/temporary.
Anonymous
Post 06/18/2015 19:53     Subject: Re:If your 1st grade daughter won the "fashionista" award at school...

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Maybe the teachers are just trying to reflect back to the kids that they are really listening to them and are hearing what's important to them. Our daughter's teacher does this about her interest in fashion and I think it's great. Her teacher last year picks up on what's important to kids and includes it in their birthday celebration. For our daughter, her teacher last year also mused that the world became a lot funnier and a lot blonder the day she was born. She loved it. She 's also in to top math and reading groups, and had a very close to perfect (all 9th stanine) ERB report. She cares, though, about being fun, and loves playing with her very blond long hair very dramatically while playing pretend games. Same thing with her red-haired close friend.


I can't believe you think it is great that the teacher commented on her blondeness or that you think it is cute that she dramatically plays with her "long, blond (sic) hair." Why exactly did you feel the need to mention that she is a blonde two times? Why is her hair color something important to her that the teacher picked up on?


PP here. My DD's hair is a bright yellow/ white shade of blonde, and it's long, curly and think. People comment on it all the time, as they do with her bright red-haired friend when they are together. Her hair color and style is something she identifies with, and her teacher are remarking on it in a very nice way. It's not that I think it's "cute." It's that I'm glad her teachers know her, and thinks out what's important to her.
Anonymous
Post 06/18/2015 18:54     Subject: If your 1st grade daughter won the "fashionista" award at school...

Have your daughter wear as many of the same clothes as possible next school year.
Anonymous
Post 06/18/2015 18:45     Subject: Re:If your 1st grade daughter won the "fashionista" award at school...

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Maybe the teachers are just trying to reflect back to the kids that they are really listening to them and are hearing what's important to them. Our daughter's teacher does this about her interest in fashion and I think it's great. Her teacher last year picks up on what's important to kids and includes it in their birthday celebration. For our daughter, her teacher last year also mused that the world became a lot funnier and a lot blonder the day she was born. She loved it. She 's also in to top math and reading groups, and had a very close to perfect (all 9th stanine) ERB report. She cares, though, about being fun, and loves playing with her very blond long hair very dramatically while playing pretend games. Same thing with her red-haired close friend.


I can't believe you think it is great that the teacher commented on her blondeness or that you think it is cute that she dramatically plays with her "long, blond (sic) hair." Why exactly did you feel the need to mention that she is a blonde two times? Why is her hair color something important to her that the teacher picked up on?


Not PP, but blonde hair is typically very pretty. Nothing wrong with that. PP's kid can be smart and pretty.

Anonymous
Post 06/18/2015 18:41     Subject: Re:If your 1st grade daughter won the "fashionista" award at school...

Anonymous wrote:Maybe the teachers are just trying to reflect back to the kids that they are really listening to them and are hearing what's important to them. Our daughter's teacher does this about her interest in fashion and I think it's great. Her teacher last year picks up on what's important to kids and includes it in their birthday celebration. For our daughter, her teacher last year also mused that the world became a lot funnier and a lot blonder the day she was born. She loved it. She 's also in to top math and reading groups, and had a very close to perfect (all 9th stanine) ERB report. She cares, though, about being fun, and loves playing with her very blond long hair very dramatically while playing pretend games. Same thing with her red-haired close friend.


I can't believe you think it is great that the teacher commented on her blondeness or that you think it is cute that she dramatically plays with her "long, blond (sic) hair." Why exactly did you feel the need to mention that she is a blonde two times? Why is her hair color something important to her that the teacher picked up on?