Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't let my DH bully and or pressure me into doing something I'm not comfortable with. He is the adult, my kids would be my priority. He sounds like a brat.

And you sound like a selfish future divorcee

Anonymous wrote:oP here.
Wow you can always count on DCUM for some tough love!!
I am a working mom so I definitely have some mon guilt, let me just say that.
And we have a sitter every other Saturday night, plus a Sunday morning sitter for 9 holes of golf twice a month.
I just want to say that in case I portrayed myself as a kid-crazed freak!!

But yes, I will invest in my marriage!! You are all correct!! I will go away for 4 nights and nurture my relationship. Or try to.

OP you should go the WHOLE week. I have gone away and always hem and haw and worry and think we should cancel and once we go, it's bliss. We come back recharged and reconnected. Esp if you're traveling somewhat far--the first and last day are travel so 4 days isn't much. Your kids will be great--they'll probably have a blast and you'll all be better off for it!

Go. Your husband deserves your time and attention and it sounds like he's made it clear that this trip is important to him. If you don't go, you're admitting what he's alleged: that your relationship takes a back seat to your kids. Remember, your kids will leave you one day. Try and make sure your husband doesn't as well.

Anonymous wrote:oP here.
Wow you can always count on DCUM for some tough love!!
I am a working mom so I definitely have some mon guilt, let me just say that.
And we have a sitter every other Saturday night, plus a Sunday morning sitter for 9 holes of golf twice a month.
I just want to say that in case I portrayed myself as a kid-crazed freak!!

But yes, I will invest in my marriage!! You are all correct!! I will go away for 4 nights and nurture my relationship. Or try to.

That's great to hear, OP. DH and I try to go away for five days every year or so and it works wonders in terms of reconnection.

oP here.
Wow you can always count on DCUM for some tough love!!
I am a working mom so I definitely have some mon guilt, let me just say that.
And we have a sitter every other Saturday night, plus a Sunday morning sitter for 9 holes of golf twice a month.
I just want to say that in case I portrayed myself as a kid-crazed freak!!

But yes, I will invest in my marriage!! You are all correct!! I will go away for 4 nights and nurture my relationship. Or try to.

I have a DS who is now 2.5 and we have gone away together 3 different times because we have a trusted babysitting source. I had zero problem doing this. I have always taken the attitude that you need to focus on your marriage and not just your children. I also welcome the break and never really understood women that had such an issue with leaving their children as long as it was with a trusted source, such as grandparents or a nanny. I probably have reverse guilt, guilty for not feeling guilty! I also love an enjoy my husband, so maybe that is the difference? When my children grow up and leave my house, I will be left with my husband and if I don't maintain that relationship we basically will be roommates/strangers living together, who wants that? I also believe your children will see as they get older that you and your spouse lack connection if you continue to ignore his needs and what should also be your needs! Food for thought!