Social anxiety and feelings of unworthiness knaw at me.

Around 35 is when my social anxiety and shyness fell to the wayside and I stopped giving a fuck in regards to what other's thought of me. Amazingly this is how my life turned around and opened up.

You're 28! You haven't wasted your youth.

But accept that you may be socially different as a person and quiet or whatever you really mean by boring. Be who you are and decide what would make her happy and her best self. Don't try to be anyone but your best self.

"The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second-best time is right now."

I spent all of my teens and twenties trying not to make the mistakes my parents did. I got married at 21 and became a hermit for ten years. I'm 32 and divorced now. I do my best to get out and see some things, but it's hard as a single parent.

My advice is to just go out and make the most of it. You won't realize how many opportunities and options you have until they're gone.

Anonymous wrote:I had a great time in my 20s. I'm having a difficult time comprehending these 30 year old virgins. Are you all fat or something?

F*** off.

Spent my 20s raising a child rather than partying. No regrets.

As other people have mentioned, meetups are great. You can find one for just about any activity. Dining out meetups, photography, hiking, brunch, etc. etc.

I went through my 20's with some regrets. I then joined a kickball league, traveled, sky diving, ran a marathon and make a bunch of new friends. I really broke out of my shell and it has made me a better more interesting more involved person.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a 28 year old virgin who spent her twenties being super boring and socially awkward. I have no fun memories of my twenties to remember.

Please help me make a change.

you are only 28. Everyone knows 30 is the new 21. Seriously, I had some weird 20 something crisis at 28 too. But then got super involved in work happy hours where I met lots of people my age who were single and also in social sports. Seriously, sign up for bocce league and soccer (if you play). you will meet a ton of people and then have fun, drinks and good times on a weekly basis.

My problem is that I've never had friends and I feel so lonely.

Do you put yourself out there at all? Do you go places to meet other single available people? Have you tried a Meet Up get together?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:40's have been fun in an entirely different way for me - and, yes, I've done lots of new things. BUT you are only in your 20's once. And your 40's, no matter how good that decade may be for you, will not be your 20's.

Do not take your youth for granted. That doesn't mean go wild and crazy if you don't want to go wild and crazy, not everyone feels comfortable doing that. But do not be afraid to experience life.

What does it mean to experience life?

Take chances and do what feels right to you.

I don't know how many "good" girls I saw play the game and finally get themselves a "good" guy only to have the relationship end. I dated a ton and allowed myself to fall in love with the "bad" boy. Yes, the relationship ended, but I'm glad I had that experience. When I was ready, the right guy came along.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a 28 year old virgin who spent her twenties being super boring and socially awkward. I have no fun memories of my twenties to remember.

Please help me make a change.

you are only 28. Everyone knows 30 is the new 21. Seriously, I had some weird 20 something crisis at 28 too. But then got super involved in work happy hours where I met lots of people my age who were single and also in social sports. Seriously, sign up for bocce league and soccer (if you play). you will meet a ton of people and then have fun, drinks and good times on a weekly basis.

My problem is that I've never had friends and I feel so lonely.

Anonymous wrote:40's have been fun in an entirely different way for me - and, yes, I've done lots of new things. BUT you are only in your 20's once. And your 40's, no matter how good that decade may be for you, will not be your 20's.

Do not take your youth for granted. That doesn't mean go wild and crazy if you don't want to go wild and crazy, not everyone feels comfortable doing that. But do not be afraid to experience life.

What does it mean to experience life?

40's have been fun in an entirely different way for me - and, yes, I've done lots of new things. BUT you are only in your 20's once. And your 40's, no matter how good that decade may be for you, will not be your 20's.

Do not take your youth for granted. That doesn't mean go wild and crazy if you don't want to go wild and crazy, not everyone feels comfortable doing that. But do not be afraid to experience life.

I had fun in my teens and 20's, but I also had a lot of fun in my 30's and my 40's have been pretty good so far, too. Make your life what you want it to be. Start dating so you can find someone you eventually want to have sex with. Join some meetup groups and meet people who will invite you to do fun things. Make a bucket list and try to knock off 1-2 things every year, at least. (I've knocked surfing, snorkeling, stand-up paddle boarding and skydiving off mine, and hope to do kayaking and guitar lessons next.)

Go see a therapist to help you with your social anxiety and help you develop skills that are more age appropriate. You probably could benefit from a medication to help with the social anxiety as well. BTW, I am a therapist and have treated many people with stories. You are not the only 28 year old virgin.

I would go on vacation somewhere warm and exotic and just let my heart be my guide (let your brain take a back seat for once, haha)