DH: "NO SWEATPANTS!"

Wow, this list is definitely more varied than the other one

Personally I cannot stand greasy long thinning hair on a guy. Cut it short, wear a basic shirt and jeans/khaki would improve the look. Oh, please shave too.

Anonymous wrote:I think the number of women who say they find a sense of humor sexy exceeds the number of women who in fact find funny guys sexy. Or maybe it's a particular type of sense of humor. I'm married, so obviously there was a woman for me - but in my teens and twenties I was typically among the funniest in any social group, getting plenty of laughs but it never turned into any particular flirting or signs of interest from women.

So, I'm still a little confused about what women really mean when they say this. I'm kind of middle of the pack in terms of looks - maybe they're thinking of a well-above average guy with a good sense of humor. Maybe they're thinking of a different kind of humor than the dry, deadpan delivery I favor. I don't know.

there are lots of physically unattractive guys making decent (not great) money who have landed nice looking women by keeping them laughing. i have liked guys i would normally not be attracted to because they're so funny. however, one such guy killed it recently because some of his self deprecating jokes were a turnoff. he can give TMI sometimes.

Anonymous wrote:Be kind

Pull your weight around the house. The fact that your mother doted on your every word and never made you wash a dish is not a plus.

Respect the fact that I have a career

Don't pull any financial boners. The guy who told me about his plans to get rich by trading foreign exchange on the internet did not get a second date.

Is this really "attractive" though? Sounds like what you'd want in a valued business partner -- not necessarily someone you want to have sex with.

Be kind

Pull your weight around the house. The fact that your mother doted on your every word and never made you wash a dish is not a plus.

Respect the fact that I have a career

Don't pull any financial boners. The guy who told me about his plans to get rich by trading foreign exchange on the internet did not get a second date.

Anonymous wrote:Strong morals
Great sense of humor
Mature
Good career
Manly: can handle a drill and diagnose what's wrong with a car.
Good manners

+1.

Be a great dad.
And please...control the body hair within reason.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If the words, "I cherish you" ever came out of my mouth while speaking to my wife, she'd laugh me out of the room.

I was thinking about this the other day. All of those romantic songs (especially the ones from the 70s and 80s). Kenn Rogers, all the other duets, etc. Lady in Red. If you actually spoke the lyrics to your wife or girlfriend, they would think it was the most pansy, unattractive thing ever. Somehow it's OK to hear it in a song or read it in a poem, but not hear it from your man.

I was thinking about this last night when I was listening to the Temptations singing "Ain't too proud to beg." He talks about how he doesn't mind looking weak or people laughing at him begging because it's that important that the girl stay with him. If the guy actually did these things, the woman would not be attracted to him, but the way David Ruffin belts it out, it's badass.

One time a guy begged me not to break up with him. He said I'm literally begging you and I thought it was amazing. He was a really confident guy, had a dangerous job, and also the only guy I've been with who was truly comfortable talking about his feelings.

Ive had the same and same reaction. To me it actually proved how confident he was. I still think he was the most purely heater guy Ive ever dated- there was never any pretense, he was always 100% honest so I knew exactly where he stood, knew he meant what he said.

Even though I was mad enough at the time not to accept his apology and agree to date him again, I still think back at that interaction and honestly I could practically jerk off over it. The expression on his face was so plaintive, so open- and so masculine at the same time, like he was so desperate for me.

I texted him about a year later (I had moved cities) but he was dating someone else, and again, we are in different cities. We might get back together one day though. That look on his face... HOT.

Advice to dudes: if you really like a girl, be honest and be plaintive. Any strong woman will not be turned off by it.

Good social skills. Have manners. Be physically attractive (i.e. as in shape as possible with good grooming). Be a gentleman.

And most important for me personally: BE A GOOD CONVERSATIONALIST.

Also study up on sex and be good in bed.

Stop practicing free-range farting throughout the house.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If the words, "I cherish you" ever came out of my mouth while speaking to my wife, she'd laugh me out of the room.

I was thinking about this the other day. All of those romantic songs (especially the ones from the 70s and 80s). Kenn Rogers, all the other duets, etc. Lady in Red. If you actually spoke the lyrics to your wife or girlfriend, they would think it was the most pansy, unattractive thing ever. Somehow it's OK to hear it in a song or read it in a poem, but not hear it from your man.

I was thinking about this last night when I was listening to the Temptations singing "Ain't too proud to beg." He talks about how he doesn't mind looking weak or people laughing at him begging because it's that important that the girl stay with him. If the guy actually did these things, the woman would not be attracted to him, but the way David Ruffin belts it out, it's badass.

One time a guy begged me not to break up with him. He said I'm literally begging you and I thought it was amazing. He was a really confident guy, had a dangerous job, and also the only guy I've been with who was truly comfortable talking about his feelings.

I love quiet confidance. Men who talk too much, yuck! Don't mind a balding guy or a little gut if you have a good attitude.

Anonymous wrote:Be kind to others. Show empathy to those who deserve it.

Have a great sense of humor. Nothing is more attractive in a man than the ability to make people laugh on cue.

Practice common sense and use it wisely.

And please...If lost, ask for directions.

That's hot.

Nope, nope, not stopping to ask directions.

I think the number of women who say they find a sense of humor sexy exceeds the number of women who in fact find funny guys sexy. Or maybe it's a particular type of sense of humor. I'm married, so obviously there was a woman for me - but in my teens and twenties I was typically among the funniest in any social group, getting plenty of laughs but it never turned into any particular flirting or signs of interest from women.

So, I'm still a little confused about what women really mean when they say this. I'm kind of middle of the pack in terms of looks - maybe they're thinking of a well-above average guy with a good sense of humor. Maybe they're thinking of a different kind of humor than the dry, deadpan delivery I favor. I don't know.

Jake Ryan

Anonymous wrote:I look for a man what I'd look for in a woman friend too- someone who is kind, lacks drama, is intelligent, and is fun to be around.

I don't expect you to make some huge effort to look hot but at least care about your health and have a presentable appearance (clean, normally dressed, not obese, smells ok).

And you don't have to be some sort of super high earner but at least care and have a plan for your career.

And if you have kids, I just want you to care about them, their futures, and be engaged with them.

Same with me- just care. It's the little things that count- little kindnesses, showing you care.

This. The appeal of "sexy" and "rich" wears off after awhile but the above is a keeper.