Anonymous wrote:I am in a sort of similar situation but it is my parents and due to cancer so no refusal. My dad is stage 4 lung cancer and cannot get tdap. My mom can't get tdap if she is around him. Obviously she is his caregiver so she cannot get the shot. It is making me sick with worry. I am due in March, my father is terminal, I have no idea what I am going to do. They won't be here for the birth because dad just started another round of 5 weeks radiation. I have not even told my husband this yet. It is overwhelming me. If it was just my dad I would be okay but both... that seems too risky.

TDaP is an inactivated or killed vaccine which means it is not live. It is a component vaccine which means it is not made o\from the virus but from the toxins produced by the infective agent. Your mother gettting the vaccine will in no way harm your father. A simplistic senerio to explain is if she eats a candy bar his blood sugar won't go up. Your mom can safely receive the TDaP as long as she herself has not had a severe adverse reaction to a previous tetanus vaccination.

FWIW I have seen babies sick with Pertussis and it is very serious. The best way to protect the baby is to make sure anyone with close contact is current on their vaccinations. Job #1 of a parent is to take smart prudent steps to decrease risks to your child. You can't put them in a bubble but you can make good choices. There is no reason for a healthy adult to not be vaccinated especially if they will be around an infant up to one year of age.

As for your dad, have him wear a mask and practice good hand washing. Sorry you're dealing with a terminaly ill parent while also preparing for the birth of a new baby. Take care of yourself too! Keeping your immune system in good shape will help keep both you and baby healthy.
Best of luck.

Anonymous wrote:OP here - they have never been vaccinated for anything, including measles. I'm not using the term anti-vaxxer to be provocative. They are exactly that - opposed to any and all vaccinations, for all people. What other term would I use??

OP, you are in a forum with a strong anti vax or "my choice" population.
I would discuss this with your pediatrician