Anonymous wrote:

Don't bother. These women on this site are fucking drones. Not a god damn thought of their own. Their husbands control them. It's gross.

If that was the case, wouldn't I just do what he wants?

-OP

I am worried about this happening with my fiance.

I'm agnostic, leaning closer to atheism. He has recently been "saved" at 35, getting baptized and attending services for 5-6 hours. He did bad things when he was younger and he thinks he's going to hell after a near-death experience. Which is where this is stemming from.

I've been clear from the get-go about my views on god. I don't constantly talk about it or try to convert him. But I'm not going to change my mind and I certainly will not be going to church (for 5 hours?? WTF!) or attending during the week. However, I will go for special occasions to support him, and I told him that.

Anyway, he said that it's not going to be an issue and he understands. But, I really hope that he's not just holding out hope he's gonna wear me down and I'll jump onboard the Jesus train. Cause it's not gonna happen.

We have zero issues otherwise. Get on great. No arguing or fights. It'd be a shame if religion broke us up.

Just let him know that you will convert when the Catholic Church sees women as equals and allows them access to ALL roles within the Church - including priesthood.

He'll have to wait until h*ll freezes over.....

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:lol. one believes Jesus is the son of God and follows the new testament. the other believes Jesus is the son of God and follows the new testament. the masses are essentially identical, as both date to the Nicene council.

One is Catholic. The other is Catholic after Henry VIII wanted a divorce but didn't want to go all Martin Luther or John Calvin.

The Church of England had substantial theological differences prior to that.

Yes, the masses are essentially identical, which is why my DH assumed I'd have no issues becoming RC. That does not mean the beliefs are the same, however similarly we worship.

-OP

you going off to one church on Sunday while your husband goes to another one is not going to make for a healthy marriage. that is stupid. A church is supposed to be a community. One of you needs to compromise.

or you should both just go episcopalian or lutheran. IT IS ALL THE SAME THING. Just read the friggin bible and stop obsessing over silly differences created by old white guys in the 1500s and 1600s.

If it were ALL THE SAME THING, her husband would not be pressuring her.

Maybe he should go to her church. You know, since they are all the same.

Don't bother. These women on this site are fucking drones. Not a god damn thought of their own. Their husbands control them. It's gross.

Asking someone to change their religion for you is akin to saying, I don't accept you. How would you feel if, after years of marriage, your spouse said, change your musical tastes. Change your clothing style. I dislike your hair, color it. Change the essence of who you are, because I don't love you in spite of our differences, like I used to.

It's a betrayal, to me. The only thing we should ever ask our SO to change are behaviors that are detrimental. Addiction, reckless behavior, etc. The rest of it, you knew before. You don't get to get pissy because someone won't change the very fabric of their self.

Religion is HIGHLY personal and no one has the right to bully their partner over it.

Anonymous wrote:As someone who grew up Catholic I understand where your husband is coming from. You're heavily indoctrinated to believe that the Roman Catholic Church is the one true church. Everything else is a sham and to be viewed with suspicion. But that's simply not true. It's about having a relationship with God through the saving grace of Jesus.

Seems like the other way around to me.

Too intimate a thing to ever ask someone to change.

As someone who grew up Catholic I understand where your husband is coming from. You're heavily indoctrinated to believe that the Roman Catholic Church is the one true church. Everything else is a sham and to be viewed with suspicion. But that's simply not true. It's about having a relationship with God through the saving grace of Jesus.

theological footnotes

OP here. Those of you saying it's all the same need to read up on transubstantiation. That and the authority of Rome are my issues, and non-negotiable. DH knew this.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:lol. one believes Jesus is the son of God and follows the new testament. the other believes Jesus is the son of God and follows the new testament. the masses are essentially identical, as both date to the Nicene council.

One is Catholic. The other is Catholic after Henry VIII wanted a divorce but didn't want to go all Martin Luther or John Calvin.

The Church of England had substantial theological differences prior to that.

Yes, the masses are essentially identical, which is why my DH assumed I'd have no issues becoming RC. That does not mean the beliefs are the same, however similarly we worship.

-OP

you going off to one church on Sunday while your husband goes to another one is not going to make for a healthy marriage. that is stupid. A church is supposed to be a community. One of you needs to compromise.

or you should both just go episcopalian or lutheran. IT IS ALL THE SAME THING. Just read the friggin bible and stop obsessing over silly differences created by old white guys in the 1500s and 1600s.

If it were ALL THE SAME THING, her husband would not be pressuring her.

Maybe he should go to her church. You know, since they are all the same.

It is all the same and he should, if she is that stubborn. Someone needs to be a grown-up.

If it were really all the same, there would not be different Christian denominations. You do not know what you are talking about.

The differences are political tripe. The bible is the same. The teaching is the same. I've been to them all, Jesus is Jesus. In this multicultural world of Buddhist, Hindu, Christian, Jewish and Islam, to hear arguments over Anglicanism vs Catholicism is pedantic nonsense.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:lol. one believes Jesus is the son of God and follows the new testament. the other believes Jesus is the son of God and follows the new testament. the masses are essentially identical, as both date to the Nicene council.

One is Catholic. The other is Catholic after Henry VIII wanted a divorce but didn't want to go all Martin Luther or John Calvin.

The Church of England had substantial theological differences prior to that.

Yes, the masses are essentially identical, which is why my DH assumed I'd have no issues becoming RC. That does not mean the beliefs are the same, however similarly we worship.

-OP

you going off to one church on Sunday while your husband goes to another one is not going to make for a healthy marriage. that is stupid. A church is supposed to be a community. One of you needs to compromise.

or you should both just go episcopalian or lutheran. IT IS ALL THE SAME THING. Just read the friggin bible and stop obsessing over silly differences created by old white guys in the 1500s and 1600s.

If it were ALL THE SAME THING, her husband would not be pressuring her.

Maybe he should go to her church. You know, since they are all the same.

It is all the same and he should, if she is that stubborn. Someone needs to be a grown-up.

If it were really all the same, there would not be different Christian denominations. You do not know what you are talking about.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:lol. one believes Jesus is the son of God and follows the new testament. the other believes Jesus is the son of God and follows the new testament. the masses are essentially identical, as both date to the Nicene council.

One is Catholic. The other is Catholic after Henry VIII wanted a divorce but didn't want to go all Martin Luther or John Calvin.

The Church of England had substantial theological differences prior to that.

Yes, the masses are essentially identical, which is why my DH assumed I'd have no issues becoming RC. That does not mean the beliefs are the same, however similarly we worship.

-OP

you going off to one church on Sunday while your husband goes to another one is not going to make for a healthy marriage. that is stupid. A church is supposed to be a community. One of you needs to compromise.

or you should both just go episcopalian or lutheran. IT IS ALL THE SAME THING. Just read the friggin bible and stop obsessing over silly differences created by old white guys in the 1500s and 1600s.

If it were ALL THE SAME THING, her husband would not be pressuring her.

Maybe he should go to her church. You know, since they are all the same.

It is all the same and he should, if she is that stubborn. Someone needs to be a grown-up.

Anonymous wrote:I should have said before that we do generally attend my church, so all the comments about us going separately are wrong. It's also been over 15 years since I attended any other church, so I'm not church hopping.

I just feel badly that whenever I tell him it's not going to happen, it ends up becoming a fight.

I suspect God doesn't look kindly on a man who doesn't value his wife and his children more than a bunch of stupid rituals that eat into time better spent with wife and kids, or hungry orphans or something. Also, as someone who attended 12 years of Catholic school and attended Mass through high school, I think Catholocism is a relatively useless thing to participate in. It's not right for a guy to ask his wife to deal with that nonsense; I worried more about asking mine for other stuff. Just tell him to live with you as you are.

Anonymous wrote:I should have said before that we do generally attend my church, so all the comments about us going separately are wrong. It's also been over 15 years since I attended any other church, so I'm not church hopping.

I just feel badly that whenever I tell him it's not going to happen, it ends up becoming a fight.

He is so out of line, to pressure you on something you never said you would do.

Maybe some short-term counseling is in order.