Hi OP! I lost a lot of weight in between my two pregnancies and then re-gained a bunch during pregnancy/breastfeeding. I've lost the weight in a healthy, slow but steady way, and here are some things that work for me:
1. Be realistic about food intake. Don't try to switch to tilapia and broccoli and eat only 1200 calories a day. It doesn't work.
2. Log everything. In fact, make a logging goal. 50 days of logging everything, even if you blow through your calorie goals, which you will do sometimes. Life happens.
3. Focus on what you are putting into your body, not what you're taking out. You need healthy, nourishing food. Have a protein goal. Have six servings of veggies every day. Make sure you're getting enough dairy (or a substitute if you don't do dairy). Drink enough water. When you're making sure to get all that good stuff in, you don't have a lot of time to think about what you're keeping out.
4. Don't categorically restrict foods. IF you say "No sweets until I lose 20 lbs" you will think about food constantly. Try to limit your junk to 10% of your daily calories or less. If you know you're going out to dinner and will be having a huge dessert, plan ahead and stay off the sweets until then.
5. FIgure out what your weak spots are in terms of diet. For me - it was as soon as I came home from work. I would be ravenous when I walked through the door and would snarf down everything in sight. I started keeping a substantial snack at work so I didn't come home hungry. (Hard boiled eggs, cheese stick, apple, nuts)
6.Follow an exercise program, don't just get to the gym and think of things to do. You can design your own program. Walk ten minutes, stretch, etc might be your first workout.
7. Do resistance/strength training. Even when the scale stalls (it will) or you gain (it happens) you'll see progress in your strength. And that will keep you motivated (and make it easier to drop fat).
Do you use myfitnesspal? Do you want a buddy to help you? As long as you stay motivated I'd be happy to "coach" you through this since I'm right with you, I've done iet before and I"m confident I'll do it again