Sigh ... and yet again blame the parents posters pop up.

Listen up! I have four children between 4 and 10 including twins in the middle. One of my twins became a horrible eater just after his third birthday. Truly out of nowhere, he began dropping foods from his "like list" at a ridiculously fast rate. Thankfully his older sister and twin sister are great. They keep me sane. His younger brother is kind of following in his footsteps but I believe he is heavily under the influence and not just a super taster like his brother. I did the same for each of them when they were young but alas this is who they are.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

- signed a lazy parent

I think it's lazy thinking to blame things on other people's "lazy parenting." I'm not even sure what "lazy parenting" means. Not to mention that it's the opposite of lazy to prepare separate meals for each family member.

It means not providing a variety of options to your child at an early age so that they are exposed to all textures and flavors. It means not providing the same meals over and over and over (chicken nuggets, cereal, hot dogs, pasta, processed snacks, and little to no vegetables/fruits). It means caving in when your child demands a separate meal because you would rather just take the easy way and give them what they want (like cereal, pb&j or pasta) than encourage them to try something new and possibly have to listen to them whine and complain because its not chicken nuggets before they actually putting it into their mouth. It isn't the opposite if the alternative meal is pb&j, frozen nuggest, etc. That is the easy way out and that is lazy parenting.

I provided plenty of variety that didn't include chicken nuggets, PBJ, mac & cheese, etc and one day DS was picky. Explain, please.

But how did you handle it when he got picky? THAT is the question. It's easy not to be lazy, until it's hard.

Anonymous wrote:60% lazy parenting
40% actual physical or psychological issues with the child.

90 % lazy parenting, and bad eating habits from parents to start with.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

- signed a lazy parent

I think it's lazy thinking to blame things on other people's "lazy parenting." I'm not even sure what "lazy parenting" means. Not to mention that it's the opposite of lazy to prepare separate meals for each family member.

It means not providing a variety of options to your child at an early age so that they are exposed to all textures and flavors. It means not providing the same meals over and over and over (chicken nuggets, cereal, hot dogs, pasta, processed snacks, and little to no vegetables/fruits). It means caving in when your child demands a separate meal because you would rather just take the easy way and give them what they want (like cereal, pb&j or pasta) than encourage them to try something new and possibly have to listen to them whine and complain because its not chicken nuggets before they actually putting it into their mouth. It isn't the opposite if the alternative meal is pb&j, frozen nuggest, etc. That is the easy way out and that is lazy parenting.

I provided plenty of variety that didn't include chicken nuggets, PBJ, mac & cheese, etc and one day DS was picky. Explain, please.

Anonymous wrote:I have no idea.

My son won't eat broccoli but will eat cabbage.
He won't eat strawberries but he will eat olives.
He won't eat oranges but he will eat hummus.
Some days he will only eat the carb served, the next day he will eat a whole steak, and the rest of my steak.

He eats raw onions.

Who knows.

+1 - My DS is the same way. Can't explain it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This article from the Post today is really interesting: http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/wonkblog/wp/2014/11/04/the-stark-difference-between-what-poor-babies-and-rich-babies-eat/

Be careful what you feed your babies when they are young because it may dictate their preferences later in life.

IMO some kids are picky because of texture or other physiological issues, but those are rare. ALmost all issues of picky eaters are cultural. I have two kids and one is somewhat picky. I take responsibility for that. For a while when he was younger we didn't handle it well and indulged him. That said, he does eat plenty of food that is not on the typical "kid friendly" list - because it's been given to him repeatedly since he was tiny- that's why he loves tofu, broccoli and spicy food.

People whose kids will only eat mac and cheese, chicken nuggets and the like have only themselves to blame.

So what happens when kids don't like typical 'kid food' but I would still consider them a picky eater? Who is to blame then? DD won't eat chicken nuggets, burgers or fries. She also hates ketchup. It isn't as simple as liking kid food vs. regular food. Or if it is, DD didn't get the memo.

YOu need to read what I said again. People whose kids will only eat mac and cheese, chicken nuggets and the like have only themselves to blame. That demonstrates a parent that is indulging their kid, not an innately picky eater. Many parents insist that is all their kid will eat -- it's mainly because that's all they've offered. It's not the case with you. My comment doesn't apply to you.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This article from the Post today is really interesting: http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/wonkblog/wp/2014/11/04/the-stark-difference-between-what-poor-babies-and-rich-babies-eat/

Be careful what you feed your babies when they are young because it may dictate their preferences later in life.

IMO some kids are picky because of texture or other physiological issues, but those are rare. ALmost all issues of picky eaters are cultural. I have two kids and one is somewhat picky. I take responsibility for that. For a while when he was younger we didn't handle it well and indulged him. That said, he does eat plenty of food that is not on the typical "kid friendly" list - because it's been given to him repeatedly since he was tiny- that's why he loves tofu, broccoli and spicy food.

People whose kids will only eat mac and cheese, chicken nuggets and the like have only themselves to blame.

So what happens when kids don't like typical 'kid food' but I would still consider them a picky eater? Who is to blame then? DD won't eat chicken nuggets, burgers or fries. She also hates ketchup. It isn't as simple as liking kid food vs. regular food. Or if it is, DD didn't get the memo.

See, this scares me because my 11 month old is picky already. He was a champion eater of breastmilk but hated solids from the moment we introduced them. Purees, BLW, cut up in one of those mesh things -- he hated them all. We have tried oatmeal, rice, and just about every fruit and vegetable under the sun (except the one or two I am allergic to). We've tried pureeing the food we eat -- I am a good cook and cook mostly from scratch. We've tried the store-bought purees and pouches. At 11 months, he loves cheerios (they fed them at day care to work on his fine motor skills, which are not good); bread; pureed sweet potatoes; and plain whole milk yogurt. That's it. He will eat some other pureed fruits and vegetables under protest but not meat. And as for finger foods, the only ones he reliably picks up are Cheerios and bread. So we spread the bread with goat cheese, to get a little protein in, and he's ok with that. But he won't even pick up most finger foods, nor let me get it anywhere near his mouth. We've tried chicken, eggs, beef, stewed lamb, sweet potato pieces, avocado, banana (what kid doesn't eat banana?!), melon, pear, etc. Nada.

DH and I eat anything. We were never picky as kids. I am afraid DS is going to be horribly picky, and I read these articles about how infants will accept anything and want to tear my hair out. Because he never has.

Anonymous wrote:60% lazy parenting
40% actual physical or psychological issues with the child.

You suck. I have cooked meals for my children every night since they were born. I've tried kid friendly, not kid friendly, ethnic, all sorts of options. I am not lazy. I just don't want to fight with my children over food. And the "a hungry child will eat if you provide them food" thing doesn't really work with at least one of my children -- she says she isn't hungry and asks to be excused and then wakes up at midnight asking for a snack since she didn't eat dinner and is hungry.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

- signed a lazy parent

I think it's lazy thinking to blame things on other people's "lazy parenting." I'm not even sure what "lazy parenting" means. Not to mention that it's the opposite of lazy to prepare separate meals for each family member.

It means not providing a variety of options to your child at an early age so that they are exposed to all textures and flavors. It means not providing the same meals over and over and over (chicken nuggets, cereal, hot dogs, pasta, processed snacks, and little to no vegetables/fruits). It means caving in when your child demands a separate meal because you would rather just take the easy way and give them what they want (like cereal, pb&j or pasta) than encourage them to try something new and possibly have to listen to them whine and complain because its not chicken nuggets before they actually putting it into their mouth. It isn't the opposite if the alternative meal is pb&j, frozen nuggest, etc. That is the easy way out and that is lazy parenting.

What if the 10-15 foods the "picky eater" eats are: pasta (can be whole wheat), cereal, carrots, broccoli, bananas, apples, cheese, chicken nuggets (will accept homemade), fish sticks (will accept homemade), PBJ sandwiches, and milk. Does this constitute enough of a "balanced diet" or do I need to force the child to eat more?

Anonymous wrote:60% lazy parenting
40% actual physical or psychological issues with the child.

Really? I disagree. Many picky eaters are born this way. My parents exposed me to plenty of different types of food over and over again. I could not stand the taste and texture of many types of food when I was kid. I am very sensitive to both and to smells. Now that I am older I am able to eat much more than I used to and enjoy plenty more foods than I did when I was a kid, however there are still things that absolutely smell/taste disgusting to me - mustard, mayo and textures that make me gag, such as mushrooms, sushi, peas, mushy bananas etc. I have tried to eat these things many many times and I'm sorry, but it does NOT change. I will not force myself to eat something that makes me want to puke.

My parents weren't lazy. My older sister will eat anything. She was served the same exact food as me. She just happened to like and tolerate more foods than I did.
Some people have different taste buds and sensitivities than others. My son will eat anything - good for him, we are lucky. But it has nothing to do with me being lazy or not. He was born that way.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

- signed a lazy parent

I think it's lazy thinking to blame things on other people's "lazy parenting." I'm not even sure what "lazy parenting" means. Not to mention that it's the opposite of lazy to prepare separate meals for each family member.

It means not providing a variety of options to your child at an early age so that they are exposed to all textures and flavors. It means not providing the same meals over and over and over (chicken nuggets, cereal, hot dogs, pasta, processed snacks, and little to no vegetables/fruits). It means caving in when your child demands a separate meal because you would rather just take the easy way and give them what they want (like cereal, pb&j or pasta) than encourage them to try something new and possibly have to listen to them whine and complain because its not chicken nuggets before they actually putting it into their mouth. It isn't the opposite if the alternative meal is pb&j, frozen nuggest, etc. That is the easy way out and that is lazy parenting.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This article from the Post today is really interesting: http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/wonkblog/wp/2014/11/04/the-stark-difference-between-what-poor-babies-and-rich-babies-eat/

Be careful what you feed your babies when they are young because it may dictate their preferences later in life.

IMO some kids are picky because of texture or other physiological issues, but those are rare. ALmost all issues of picky eaters are cultural. I have two kids and one is somewhat picky. I take responsibility for that. For a while when he was younger we didn't handle it well and indulged him. That said, he does eat plenty of food that is not on the typical "kid friendly" list - because it's been given to him repeatedly since he was tiny- that's why he loves tofu, broccoli and spicy food.

People whose kids will only eat mac and cheese, chicken nuggets and the like have only themselves to blame.

If a kid who was fed tomatoes and tomato juice and tomato sauce when younger, announces that in fact he doesn't like tomato sauce (and dad doesn't either BTW), should the child be forced to eat it? And are the parents to blame that olive oil and parmesan cheese is preferred to the red sauce or pesto? Is it OK with you if the child prefers raw tomatoes on the side instead of red sauce? Why are you blaming anyone for anything as long as kids are getting a balanced diet? How about the kid who won't touch fried and breaded chicken nuggets due to the the texture and prefers simply grilled chicken? Too picky?

At what age are kids allowed to have preferences without the parents begin blamed for having "caused" someone else's idea of poor eating habits?

Not PP, but I don't think a "balanced diet" is established if a child will only eat mac and cheese, chicken nuggets, etc., which is exactly what PP noted. I think a picky eater is one that limits their diet to 10 - 15 items or less - without exception. The examples you provide don't indicate a "picky eater' they are examples of preparation preferences, which is probably a texture issue for the child.

Anonymous wrote:This article from the Post today is really interesting: http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/wonkblog/wp/2014/11/04/the-stark-difference-between-what-poor-babies-and-rich-babies-eat/

Be careful what you feed your babies when they are young because it may dictate their preferences later in life.

IMO some kids are picky because of texture or other physiological issues, but those are rare. ALmost all issues of picky eaters are cultural. I have two kids and one is somewhat picky. I take responsibility for that. For a while when he was younger we didn't handle it well and indulged him. That said, he does eat plenty of food that is not on the typical "kid friendly" list - because it's been given to him repeatedly since he was tiny- that's why he loves tofu, broccoli and spicy food.

People whose kids will only eat mac and cheese, chicken nuggets and the like have only themselves to blame.

If a kid who was fed tomatoes and tomato juice and tomato sauce when younger, announces that in fact he doesn't like tomato sauce (and dad doesn't either BTW), should the child be forced to eat it? And are the parents to blame that olive oil and parmesan cheese is preferred to the red sauce or pesto? Is it OK with you if the child prefers raw tomatoes on the side instead of red sauce? Why are you blaming anyone for anything as long as kids are getting a balanced diet? How about the kid who won't touch fried and breaded chicken nuggets due to the the texture and prefers simply grilled chicken? Too picky?

At what age are kids allowed to have preferences without the parents begin blamed for having "caused" someone else's idea of poor eating habits?

One of our kids is "picky" - loves any kind of carb, chicken (various other meats too, luckily) and refuses nearly all vegetables and fruits (maybe eats an apple or cantaloupe once in a blue moon). He will eat one bite of veggies at dinner and that's it (because that's the rule). Other kid eats everything under the sun. Ironically, neither of our kids eats burgers, pizza, ketchup... aka normal kid food. That would make my life easier!

Anonymous wrote:This article from the Post today is really interesting: http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/wonkblog/wp/2014/11/04/the-stark-difference-between-what-poor-babies-and-rich-babies-eat/

Be careful what you feed your babies when they are young because it may dictate their preferences later in life.

IMO some kids are picky because of texture or other physiological issues, but those are rare. ALmost all issues of picky eaters are cultural. I have two kids and one is somewhat picky. I take responsibility for that. For a while when he was younger we didn't handle it well and indulged him. That said, he does eat plenty of food that is not on the typical "kid friendly" list - because it's been given to him repeatedly since he was tiny- that's why he loves tofu, broccoli and spicy food.

People whose kids will only eat mac and cheese, chicken nuggets and the like have only themselves to blame.

So what happens when kids don't like typical 'kid food' but I would still consider them a picky eater? Who is to blame then? DD won't eat chicken nuggets, burgers or fries. She also hates ketchup. It isn't as simple as liking kid food vs. regular food. Or if it is, DD didn't get the memo.