You did the right thing.

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't have sent my kid to bed without supper because it has all kinds of ramifications for problems in the immediate future- hunger leading to lack of sleep, leading to more behavior, etc. Exception, I would let him go to bed hungry if he refused to eat what I served for dinner.

However, I don't think it's a big deal that you did this and don't see why people are judging. A lot of kids are sassy and it's not usually a reflection on the parents. I'm a good parent and my kid just seems to go there, and always has- he isn't very mature in this regard and lets his emotions get the better of him.

Back to your question-- I have gotten upset enough with my son's behavior that I served him a bowl of cold cereal and an apple because he was acting so disrespectful that I just did not feel like cooking for him. Could be an option.

I personally would have considered this a reward, not a punishment. I LOVED cereal as a preteen/teen!Still do, actually.

It is illegal not to feed your children in more advanced countries You should be ashamed of your non-existent parenting skills if you have to take away your childs FOOD to try and fix behavior issues that were most likely caused or made worse by YOUR parenting...That's all you are going to hear from me.

Pick up neighborhood trash

I wouldn't have sent my kid to bed without supper because it has all kinds of ramifications for problems in the immediate future- hunger leading to lack of sleep, leading to more behavior, etc. Exception, I would let him go to bed hungry if he refused to eat what I served for dinner.

However, I don't think it's a big deal that you did this and don't see why people are judging. A lot of kids are sassy and it's not usually a reflection on the parents. I'm a good parent and my kid just seems to go there, and always has- he isn't very mature in this regard and lets his emotions get the better of him.

Back to your question-- I have gotten upset enough with my son's behavior that I served him a bowl of cold cereal and an apple because he was acting so disrespectful that I just did not feel like cooking for him. Could be an option.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is supper? A Midwestern dinner?

Supper

1 a : the evening meal especially when dinner is taken at midday b : a social affair featuring a supper; especially : an evening social especially for raising funds
2: the food served as a supper <eat your supper>
3: a light meal served late in the evening

http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/supper

Don't use this word. It's dated and weird.

We're from the south and use "supper" all the time. It really is OK to have different dialects in our area. Don't be a snob. Embrace diversity.

I feel for both you and your daughter. If her attitude is ongoing, think about rebuilding your relationship with her.
It seems broken.

I gave my parents a similar experience from about 14--20 years old. I was miserable to live with....attitude... Snarkiness..grumpiness.
.eyerolling... Blah!!!!

Reality was I was really lonely. I was painfully shy and suffered tremendously and school and social settings. I held it together at school but fell apart at home. My mother wasn't at all understanding or compassionate about my shyness which affected so much of my interaction with my family members. I was unpleasant to be around and they made it clear by treating me badly. I remember my mother sitting with my older sister at night and hearing them talking and giggling together. I was lucky if my mother paused at my room to say goodnight. I felt I didn't deserve to be loved but I didn't know how to change.

Love story short, try reconnecting with your daughter. She could be very stressed about dealing with growing up
Rebuild the relationship. It will take time..... Months and months of calmness but it will be worth it.

I haveva 14 yo DD and this week was very rocky. First, these kids are back to school and getting up really early. Second, they are still not back into a good routine for a newcschool year. Finally, they are dealing with lots of new classes and teachers and that can be really stressful. So, my DD has been short, cranky, and not the most pleasant person to be around. I simply refuse to interact with her if her tone and words are not acceptable. The crazy part is she often doesn't realize how off her tone is so by calmly saying I can not help you (listen, find a solution, meet your needs) right now she also learns how she sounds. I think this is a teachable skill.

Anonymous wrote:As somebody who has struggled with an eating disorder since about that age, I have to say that withholding nourishment is never appropriate. Missing a single meal might not harm her physically, but, it sends the message that she does not deserve something so essential. It is dehumanizing, and it can be very damaging.

I can't see ever doing it but her point was not to withhold food but to let her child know mouthliness won't be tolerated. One night without a meal isn't going to kill the child particularly if the child snacked afterschool.. If the OP did this on a regular basis it would very well be abuse. I don't spank my children either but I don't think everyone who does it from time to time is a monster either. OP got her message across. She doesn't appear as a person who thinks withholding food is a good long term discipline strategy.

As somebody who has struggled with an eating disorder since about that age, I have to say that withholding nourishment is never appropriate. Missing a single meal might not harm her physically, but, it sends the message that she does not deserve something so essential. It is dehumanizing, and it can be very damaging.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is supper? A Midwestern dinner?

Supper

1 a : the evening meal especially when dinner is taken at midday b : a social affair featuring a supper; especially : an evening social especially for raising funds
2: the food served as a supper <eat your supper>
3: a light meal served late in the evening

http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/supper

Don't use this word. It's dated and weird.

Anonymous wrote:I love that your first option is slapping your child in the face. You are a real winner.

I think she sounds like a human and not some made-up sugar-coated politically-correct mom that no one can stand to be around.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would never send my child to bed without support. Or dinner either. Not eating before bedtime can disrupt sleep. But that's me.

Oh please. Your precious snowflake. Maybe a night without food or good sleep would get the eye rolls to stop. Kids walk all over parents these days.

God, I'm so sick of people like you. Just because some people choose to parent in a manner other than a prison warden doesn't mean a parent is getting walked over or that they are catering to a "snowflake." And, here's a newsflash: Your prison tactics don't always were. My parents were uber strict. I didn't walk all over them. But, I didn't respect them (b/c they didn't respect me).

Frankly, I would not have taken away dinner. What's the lesson? Disobey = you won't be fed. Dumb. I would have sent her to her room until dinner. Then delivered what I was taking away -something that mattered to her (whatever her important "currency" is - during dinner. For every sassy remark, she'd get something else taken away. After dinner, she goes to her room and stays there. If that's being walked over, so be it. But, it works in our house.

Don't 12/13yr olds want to be in their room away from their parents after a fight? Sounds like a win win for your kids. Glad it works.

Oh and calling other parents who aren't pushovers like you, prison wardens, is doing exactly what you said you were annoyed with. I guess people can be sick of you being judgmental too.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would never send my child to bed without support. Or dinner either. Not eating before bedtime can disrupt sleep. But that's me.

Oh please. Your precious snowflake. Maybe a night without food or good sleep would get the eye rolls to stop. Kids walk all over parents these days.

God, I'm so sick of people like you. Just because some people choose to parent in a manner other than a prison warden doesn't mean a parent is getting walked over or that they are catering to a "snowflake." And, here's a newsflash: Your prison tactics don't always were. My parents were uber strict. I didn't walk all over them. But, I didn't respect them (b/c they didn't respect me).

Frankly, I would not have taken away dinner. What's the lesson? Disobey = you won't be fed. Dumb. I would have sent her to her room until dinner. Then delivered what I was taking away -something that mattered to her (whatever her important "currency" is - during dinner. For every sassy remark, she'd get something else taken away. After dinner, she goes to her room and stays there. If that's being walked over, so be it. But, it works in our house.

Anonymous wrote:No snark intended but 12 year olds play with Leggos? Really?

You're an asshole. No snark intended.