OP,
I think he's going to propose. By Christmas. If not before. PLEASE update us!

I love that he did not brag about it but let you find out that way. That is commendable in a world of total assholes.

My H is from a very wealthy and prestigious family in New England. When we met I though his name could not be THAT same family but sure enough...it was!

A year late we were engaged and 16 years later here we are married. I come from a good family upper middle class but his family is in a different league, but it never really changed anything, he is really grounded as is his family (old money) and my family is very secure and educated so are not threatened by it. Thankfully it worked well and there was never any sense of a hierarchy within the two families.

If you love him then go for it..sounds like a keeper!

My wife is from a very wealthy family and I am not. Not at all. What matters is how they feel about their wealthy. My wife is the most generous human being I have ever known in my life - generous with her time, her friendship, her compassion as well as her wealth and property. She had a huge house in the Hamptons right on the water and it was filled with visiting friends - everyone was invited to share this beautiful summer property and rest up at her house. What her family has they share graciously.

My wife made it clear that what she inherited had nothing to do with her achievements any more than she could feel person achievement over having blue eyes - it was pure chance that she was born onto this family. She works very hard as a teacher however and for that she is very proud.

My point - wealth can be either good or bad - it depends on how the person sees it. We have been very happily married for over 16 years now and I have to say that her family money has made our lives much easier but not problem free by any means. I never left my career and I've worked as hard if not harder after we were married than I did before.


If you love this guy you love all parts of him - and his family and wealth are part of it. Yes, the relationship can work - I'm proof of that.

Anonymous wrote:OP

If the parents are good people, they may donate their money to various charities and leave the money to them as well. There is no guarantee that their son will get any money from them. It sounds like they raised him to be a decent person who is self-supporting. That is their obligation to him. But do enjoy those visits to their home.

Good point.

Moreover, understand that there can be a difference between appearances and substance. For example, my parents had friends who had 2 houses, a plane, spent rather ostentatiously, etc. My parents had one house (nice but not extravagant), drove Chevys & Oldsmobiles, didn't take fancy vacations, etc. My father mentioned to me once about 15-20 yrs. ago that, in fact, the friends had no more than my parents did but they spent a lot and my parents saved more.

You don't know how leveraged BF's parents may be, in addition to what their plans are (my father once said that he didn't think any children needed to inherit more than $1M to be secure --- luckily for my brother and me he was an even more successful saver/investor than that and while he gave away a lot to charity, we each ended up with quite a bit more than that from my parents, in addition to having earned that much or more on our own). Point is, looks can be deceiving and even if the substance matches the look, there's no assurance that what's theirs may be his.

Good luck, though, they sound like decent people who are not overly swayed in the wrong direction by their good fortune.

Anonymous wrote:

Relax. Some people are tapping on their phones, with autocorrect going.

What does proper grammar have to do with autocorrect? Take the time to make sure your post makes sense.

I have an experience where it ended up not working out, but the family sounds a lot different than your BF's, OP. Several years ago I was dating a guy who seemed to be well off but not unusually so. It turns out that they were billionaires - gorgeous homes in 4 different countries, owned art that could comprise its own museum (they donate a piece annually), amazing international travel several times a year, etc.

They were incredibly sweet and generous people and invited me along on family trips, let me stay at their homes even if none of them were there, and gave me work with BF at some of the family offices. We discussed marriage and his parents were thrilled and supportive about it... but they also became much more controlling. He and I were told not asked where we would spend our summers (still grad students) and it did not go over well when I politely declined, and he mentioned in a joking way (but I didn't think it was at all funny) that if I ever divorced him and we were parents, his family would make sure I never saw any of our children.

In your case you get to see your BF as an already independent person, whereas mine was still at a stage of life where he was getting a lot of support from his parents. But things really changed when we got serious and in my case I was glad to have gotten out of it.

I loved reading the stories of those that it did work out for!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
get knocked up asap.


Classy.

Ignore the pp, she just wants what you have...that's why you she get knocked up now!

English, please. Jesus Christ.

Relax. Some people are tapping on their phones, with autocorrect going.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
get knocked up asap.


Classy.

Ignore the pp, she just wants what you have...that's why you she get knocked up now!

English, please. Jesus Christ.