Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a college administrator, I can't remember a student (except international or very unusual trying family circumstances) who didn't have one parent attend orientation. These were high price privates in top 50. My parents didn't attend my state school orientation in the 90's, but there also wasn't a parent track set up for them. At my most recent school, GW, the students are almost never with their parents, except a dinner or two. Yet, it still is a shared experience between them.

Agreed. Sometimes the faux anti-helicoptering parents love to chime in about what they're not doing for their kids. Or maybe they just don't want to take a day off work. Orientation time is a clear demarcation of "here, we got you to college, the rest is up to you."

+1

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:16:40 How old is your child? I'm going to orientation in late August and parent's weekend in November but in between my child is on his/her own!

+1. Call your kid frequently to ask about her new friends, how the local pizza joint is, and whether she needs a new winter coat. But don't ask if she's completed that English Lit reading yet.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a college administrator, I can't remember a student (except international or very unusual trying family circumstances) who didn't have one parent attend orientation. These were high price privates in top 50. My parents didn't attend my state school orientation in the 90's, but there also wasn't a parent track set up for them. At my most recent school, GW, the students are almost never with their parents, except a dinner or two. Yet, it still is a shared experience between them.

Agreed. Sometimes the faux anti-helicoptering parents love to chime in about what they're not doing for their kids. Or maybe they just don't want to take a day off work. Orientation time is a clear demarcation of "here, we got you to college, the rest is up to you."

Anonymous wrote:As a college administrator, I can't remember a student (except international or very unusual trying family circumstances) who didn't have one parent attend orientation. These were high price privates in top 50. My parents didn't attend my state school orientation in the 90's, but there also wasn't a parent track set up for them. At my most recent school, GW, the students are almost never with their parents, except a dinner or two. Yet, it still is a shared experience between them.

Anonymous wrote:16:40 How old is your child? I'm going to orientation in late August and parent's weekend in November but in between my child is on his/her own!

Anonymous wrote:

Speak for yourself (and pray for your child). Being involved as a trusted advisor is NOT inconsistent with allowing a child to make decisions. Intelligent people understand that the quality of a decision depends on the quality of the information available to the decision maker. Any parent who says their major role is writing a check is either lying, ignorant or completely lacking in self confidence.

Anonymous wrote:I would be happy to just write a check. When DC goes off to school I know that if I become involved its because he is having a problem. Otherwise, he's perfectly capable of choosing classes and finding his own way. He doesn't need me to provide information -- he's there, I'm home, he will certainly have access to more information than I do. This whole "trusted advisor" thing, I don't get. Unless you are somehow getting copies of things like class or activity signups, what are you advising him on? And those are precisely the decisions he should be making on his own. I know my DS would not need or want our involvement. If he is encountering some kind of issue, he'll ask for my involvement. I hope that doesn't happen, which is why I'm saying I hope my only role is to write checks.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Some schools have parent programs that are separate from the new student programs. I laugh at parents who think there sole role is writing a check.

Actually, your major role IS writing the check. You don't even get to see the grades unless your kid gives them to you, or you find out that your kid has been tossed out. Let your kid start making his own decisions.

If your kid's college puts on a few days of parent seminars, that's great. But DC's school, an Ivy, had almost nothing for parents, except (a) a July meeting here in DC that lasted all of 2-3 hours, and (b) sandwhich wraps under a tent on move-in day. Parent Weekend wasn't much better, but at least there was the Homecoming football game to attend.

Speak for yourself (and pray for your child). Being involved as a trusted advisor is NOT inconsistent with allowing a child to make decisions. Intelligent people understand that the quality of a decision depends on the quality of the information available to the decision maker. Any parent who says their major role is writing a check is either lying, ignorant or completely lacking in self confidence.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Some schools have parent programs that are separate from the new student programs. I laugh at parents who think there sole role is writing a check.

Actually, your major role IS writing the check. You don't even get to see the grades unless your kid gives them to you, or you find out that your kid has been tossed out. Let your kid start making his own decisions.

If your kid's college puts on a few days of parent seminars, that's great. But DC's school, an Ivy, had almost nothing for parents, except (a) a July meeting here in DC that lasted all of 2-3 hours, and (b) sandwhich wraps under a tent on move-in day. Parent Weekend wasn't much better, but at least there was the Homecoming football game to attend.