Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I agree that it is refreshing. I roll my eyes at all these wimpy, scaredy-cat kids running around. I'm glad we didn't go there with DD. There's nothing cute about it.

Sounds like you'll be very proud and smug when your DD is playing Call of Duty at 7 years old and thinks nothing of killing . . . not like those wimpy kids you detest, right?

I'm the poster the poster you quoted agreed with, not the poster you quoted. But... Call of Duty is a video game, saying that someone who plays a game doesn't mind killing -- with the implication being that you mean doing so in the real world to real people -- makes no sense. By that same token, is a 7 year old who plays the board game "Life" fine with becoming pregnant at a young age since in the game players end up with kids? Does playing "Monopoly" desensitize kids to going to jail and make it more likely they will do that since players in the game end up in jail? Do most kids who watch cartoons duplicate things like walking off cliffs or blowing stuff up? Of course not, because those things are ridiculous, right? Your video game example uses the exact same logic.

I wouldn't be "proud or smug" if my DD enjoyed that game, but I certainly wouldn't be disturbed as it seems you would. If her enjoyment of it stemmed from a fascination with military service or the idea of dealing with the "bad guys" I would probably encourage her interest in the military by providing real information, exploration of successful military ops both historical and more modern, trips to related interesting places, etc. Detailed discussion of what is publicly known about the bin Laden raid would be offered as something she might find nearly as interesting as the success against fictional adversaries in the game.

It's not as though such a game would be my DD's first exposure to the concepts of death, or killing, so she would know our family's thoughts on the matter. Both girls watch the news with us almost daily, and unless you completely shelter your kid it would be pretty hard to get to age 7 without having had some exposure to those concepts.

Liking a particular video game isn't something to be proud about necessarily, but it could suggest a general attitude of being brave, or of having sufficiently good safety awareness/perspective not to bothered by "scary" things that are not actual threats, or a budding interest in a military/law enforcement/defense related career, and those underlying personality traits might be something a parent would be proud of.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A 4yo who is not scared of evil things is worrisome. It's not developmentally appropriate. There's nothing about parenting style or child's personality. It's a serious issue and this child needs help.

But what is evil about a movie exactly? Not trying to be an idiot, genuinely curious. I could see considering something "evil" if
- it was a person, capable of moral reasoning, that intended to do actual harm to other living beings,
- it was a person, capable of moral reasoning, that actually perpetrated some sort of violent or grossly malicious act against other living beings,
- it was a person, capable of moral reasoning, that knowingly provided any type of support to the above categories of individual or their agents,
- it was a person, capable of moral reasoning, that knowingly and willfully concealed or lied about information concerning the above individuals or their plans, or
- it was offensive to your religious/spiritual/moral beliefs.

None of these things apply to that movie. The closest I can come is that characters in the movie act maliciously or violently towards other characters. Is that what you mean by evil? If so, I understand where you are coming from but disagree with you on one fundamental point. That movie is a work of fiction, portraying a story which did not really happen. Nobody got hurt or worse making the film, nor will anything on the screen hurt anyone watching the film in any way.

I made a conscious effort to always help my girls distinguish between something that is actually bad and scary because it might harm someone and something that is just pretend. While they may have been slightly scared by scary movies at first, I was fine with them seeing films or shows featuring fantasy-type "violence" because I have always drawn a very sharp distinction between actual bad people and storybook bad guys.

Was this the wrong approach? Should I have instead allowed or encouraged my kids to find such things evil and scary because they are still depicting violence or malice even if it is not targeted towards a real living being? In other words I guess what I am asking is, are scary films inherently evil or are the characters' actions evil only in relation to the other fictional characters because such actions would be evil in the real world?

If the child has decided that the characters are just pretend and therefore can't hurt anyone, even if she knows the character is the bad guy, should she still be scared? If so, why? what is there to be frightened of?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A 4yo who is not scared of evil things is worrisome. It's not developmentally appropriate. There's nothing about parenting style or child's personality. It's a serious issue and this child needs help.

But what is evil about a movie exactly? Not trying to be an idiot, genuinely curious. I could see considering something "evil" if
- it was a person, capable of moral reasoning, that intended to do actual harm to other living beings,
- it was a person, capable of moral reasoning, that actually perpetrated some sort of violent or grossly malicious act against other living beings,
- it was a person, capable of moral reasoning, that knowingly provided any type of support to the above categories of individual or their agents,
- it was a person, capable of moral reasoning, that knowingly and willfully concealed or lied about information concerning the above individuals or their plans, or
- it was offensive to your religious/spiritual/moral beliefs.

None of these things apply to that movie. The closest I can come is that characters in the movie act maliciously or violently towards other characters. Is that what you mean by evil? If so, I understand where you are coming from but disagree with you on one fundamental point. That movie is a work of fiction, portraying a story which did not really happen. Nobody got hurt or worse making the film, nor will anything on the screen hurt anyone watching the film in any way.

I made a conscious effort to always help my girls distinguish between something that is actually bad and scary because it might harm someone and something that is just pretend. While they may have been slightly scared by scary movies at first, I was fine with them seeing films or shows featuring fantasy-type "violence" because I have always drawn a very sharp distinction between actual bad people and storybook bad guys.

Was this the wrong approach? Should I have instead allowed or encouraged my kids to find such things evil and scary because they are still depicting violence or malice even if it is not targeted towards a real living being? In other words I guess what I am asking is, are scary films inherently evil or are the characters' actions evil only in relation to the other fictional characters because such actions would be evil in the real world?

If the child has decided that the characters are just pretend and therefore can't hurt anyone, even if she knows the character is the bad guy, should she still be scared? If so, why? what is there to be frightened of?

Anonymous wrote:A 4yo who is not scared of evil things is worrisome. It's not developmentally appropriate. There's nothing about parenting style or child's personality. It's a serious issue and this child needs help.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is it weird that *I* really want to see it? Wondering if it would be an OK date night movie. Or perhaps DH and I need to get an adult life.

No DH and I want to go...reminds me of the play wicked.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I took my six year old. She liked it and wasn't scared. She's perfectly well-adjusted as far as we can tell and not "desensitized" to violence, but that suggestion did make me laugh.

I'm sure there are a lot of older kids who would be upset at some parts. It's pretty scary. Just like there are some adults who like horror movies and some who don't, children have different tastes and temperaments.

Smile dismissively all you want, but you have desensitized your very young child. That may be your objective, but a six year old doesn't just "choose" to see that type of movie because of different tastes and temperaments. YOU have chosen for her.

Anonymous wrote:I took my six year old. She liked it and wasn't scared. She's perfectly well-adjusted as far as we can tell and not "desensitized" to violence, but that suggestion did make me laugh.

I'm sure there are a lot of older kids who would be upset at some parts. It's pretty scary. Just like there are some adults who like horror movies and some who don't, children have different tastes and temperaments.

Anonymous wrote:A 4yo who is not scared of evil things is worrisome. It's not developmentally appropriate. There's nothing about parenting style or child's personality. It's a serious issue and this child needs help.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I agree that it is refreshing. I roll my eyes at all these wimpy, scaredy-cat kids running around. I'm glad we didn't go there with DD. There's nothing cute about it.

Sounds like you'll be very proud and smug when your DD is playing Call of Duty at 7 years old and thinks nothing of killing . . . not like those wimpy kids you detest, right?

Nope. She is brave and fearless and strong. None of this hiding behind behind us and pretending to be afraid because it is supposed to be "cute."

Anonymous wrote:So, has anyone ACTUALLY seen the movie? Thinking of taking my 7 yr old.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am taking my 4y old!

I hope you will enjoy the 5 minutes of the movie before you will have to leave with a terrified, crying kid.

No, she will be fine based on past experiences.