Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, the goal is to feed the baby. Is the baby getting fed? If so, then everything is good.

+1!

+10K

Well, since wetnurses are not out of style , just stop the breastfeeding! It sounds like you're miserable. That's no fun. Being a new mommy is hard enough without adding to the misery!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: Did you ever use formula? Formula was reallllly easy! Mix up a pitcher at night, put bottles in dishwasher. Or use drop-ins. So, so , easy. When I switched from BF/pumping to formula i was wondering what all the fuss was about.

I am the PP you are responding to. Yes, I have supplemented with formula and found it to be such a PITA. Have you BFed? The washing of bottle parts (not everything comes out clean in dishwasher, plus they smell like dish soap, and even if you can make the dishwasher work, there are so many parts to load, unload, keep track of, etc.), the advance planning it takes to feed formula outside the home, the spoiling/storage issues, and the expense of formula feeding was a major pain. This is not to say you are horrible if you do not BF, but I did find it considerably easier than the alternatives once you got established (six weeks for me with my first kid).

Hah - sounds like you had functional boobs. And a lame dishwasher. I had the opposite. i did bf, and I think full on formula is easier than supplementing. I made up the bottles the day before. Kept water, powder and a clean bottle in diaper bag at all times. Also kept one bottle of ready to feed just in case. There weren't many parts to keep track of at all - nipple, ring, bottle. Another thing that is easier when you have tons of bottles. When we were supplementing we had only a couple of bottles so I could see how that could be annoying.

Anonymous wrote: Did you ever use formula? Formula was reallllly easy! Mix up a pitcher at night, put bottles in dishwasher. Or use drop-ins. So, so , easy. When I switched from BF/pumping to formula i was wondering what all the fuss was about.

I am the PP you are responding to. Yes, I have supplemented with formula and found it to be such a PITA. Have you BFed? The washing of bottle parts (not everything comes out clean in dishwasher, plus they smell like dish soap, and even if you can make the dishwasher work, there are so many parts to load, unload, keep track of, etc.), the advance planning it takes to feed formula outside the home, the spoiling/storage issues, and the expense of formula feeding was a major pain. This is not to say you are horrible if you do not BF, but I did find it considerably easier than the alternatives once you got established (six weeks for me with my first kid).

OP, you sound just like me a year and a half ago, tears and all. My baby had trouble latching at first but even after she got the hang of it she continued to lose weight. I pumped for 4 months and never ever got more than one ounce per breast, and that was on a good day. And yes, I saw 3 LC's, used nipple shields, ate/drank fenugreek, oatmeal, etc like crazy,....you name it, I tried it. Nothing worked. My time with my baby got so much better once I gave up. I'm glad she got that little bit of breast milk, I guess, but was it worth it? Probably not. I later found out that my paternal grandmother had to use formula (that she had to make herself) with some of her children due to not making enough milk. Do whatever you need to do to get through these early weeks/months and do not feel guilty!

Breastfeedinglady.com

Angela saved my breastfeeding relationship. She will come to you and even took our aetna.

I was you op. It's hard and I'm sure you are doing a great job despite how you feel.

My first BF effortlessly, so it was shocking to me when my second would not latch. I sought help from a lactation consultant as well as the LLL (both were super-helpful) and learned from Dr. Jack Newman's website that most non-latchers will latch by 6 weeks old. (In fact, I corresponded with Dr. Newman on the topic.) So, I pumped every three hours around the clock and just kept trying every day. In the meanwhile I enjoyed snuggling him with lots of skin-to-skin contact, played music I loved, and stayed in touch every day with supportive people. Sure enough, at 5 weeks old, he latched - and went on to nurse for 3+ years.

One of my favorite books is So That's What They're For - an informative, helpful, easy and entertaining read. This was a long time ago though, so you should look into other books - I think Dr. Newman has a great book too.

Dr. Jack Newman's website has some great info:

http://www.breastfeedingonline.com/newman.shtml#sthash.9ZwxOuTN.dpbs

Here is a piece on babies not latching:

https://www.nbci.ca/index.php?option=com_content&v...&catid=5:information&Itemid=17

Hope this helps.

Hi OP. I had a really difficult time with my first baby as my milk didn't come in until day 5 and I feel like he never really slept until that day. He fell asleep after I had to pump my gigantically engorged boob to get him to latch and I swore he died because he'd never slept so long. It is rough the first 6 weeks but I promise it gets better, I went on to nurse all 4 of my kids remembering to never quit on my worst day. That way, I know I made an informed decision and not frustrated one.

Ha! 3 lactation consultants, nursing and pumping around the clock, baby failing to gain weight, doctors and lactation consultants saying things like, "well your milk should have come in by *now*," while looking worried and concerned, an infection, 104 degree fever and nursing and pumping through that...

I finally gave up and switched to formula. I wish had done it sooner and I wish I had been able to forgive myself sooner.

Mine is 12 now. If there is some lasting effect from not breast feeding, I don't know what it is. I do know beyond a shadow of a doubt that she is happier when her mom is happier.

NP here. OP, thank you so much for starting this thread. I am four weeks in, and while you and I sound like we are having different issues, it is so emotionally draining. I can't tell you the number of times I have cried over BFing my child and my husband thinks I am crazy to keep trying!

For me, the support group at the breast feeding center was great. Not really bc any information shared was life changing... But just knowing that SO many more people are struggling with this than you realize. Hugely emotionally comforting to me to not feel alone.

Best of luck with whatever you decide!

I was never able to BF DD. It was a terrible feeling and even with seeing a lactation consultant I gave it up. I switched to EPing and made it a year. It was much less stressful for me in the end (I did this while working and traveling internationally).

When DS was born, things went better and I was able to BF, but I eventually switched to EPing, which was just less stressful for me.

Do what works for you and forget about what the others say. Plenty of women BF, plenty EP, and plenty use only formula, don't feel guilty about your choice.

I am just past 6 months and have just learned that my poor latching and poor sucking baby is underfed. It had messed with my supply so I'm up at 3:30 pumping. Additionally, trying to get him to take a bottle (formula or milk) isn't easy and he is very pissed off about formula.

I wish I had stopped wth the guilt and started supplementing earlier. Nursing has been constantly difficult for us and it's made me miserable. I've spent tons of money on LCs all who basically give me the same advice.

I saw this to tell you - you're not along. Give it your best effort and if it doesn't work, there are more important things to worry about. Pumped milk is good. Formula is fine. It's hard to stop feeling guilty at first but at almost 7 months I am so tired of trying to make nursing happen. Don't be me! Easier said that done. I know!

Anonymous wrote:are the flanges the right size? is the pump working correctly? did a LC check thesethings? both issues do happen. i am not a bf nazi, i just have bfed two kids and it is so good for your kid, so much easier in the long run than ep or formula, and so emotionally rewarding that i -want- it to work for you. just not having any milk is pretty unlikely. if you are not making progress with a LC, try a different one. it tookme six weeks to get comfortable the first time, i wish i had found good consultant sooner. hang in there. you can do this.

Did you ever use formula? Formula was reallllly easy! Mix up a pitcher at night, put bottles in dishwasher. Or use drop-ins. So, so , easy. When I switched from BF/pumping to formula i was wondering what all the fuss was about.

OP, feed the baby! No need to feel guilty. Find a good LC, some unfortunately are going to be counterproductive. Hopefully your insurance covers it. I spent more on LCs/pumps/nursing supplies in the first 3 months than I spent in the following 9 months using formula!