Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why are you counting daycare against your salary alone and not your overall HHI??

You are an idealist, aren't you? Silly question.

she mentions this in every thread. she is annoying

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why are you counting daycare against your salary alone and not your overall HHI??

You are an idealist, aren't you? Silly question.

Nope. This is how we think of child care in our home---
A household expense, just like the mortgage.

Don't do it. If you are out of the workforce for 6 years you really will start at the bottom - actually below the bottom, because most people will rather have "fresh" from school talent than stale talent.

Also - think about your pension/TSP. You'll stop making contributions and matches.

Also, 1,200 left over is pretty good. Do a budget to pay closer attention.

How secure is your husband's job? My kids know that mommy and daddy both work and we are a team. both parents volunteer (OK daddy is at school way more than me - the SAH PTA moms are a double standard - suck up to my hubby when he volunteers and give me the cold sholder - that is another string!)

I'm still confused if the OP is actually netting anything - she said 1200 a month but then said she's pulling from savings... which is is?

I most cases I'd say keep the job. Netting 1200 a month isn't that bad - far better than what I was netting with 2 in daycare.

Do you and DH already own a home with at least 20% equity? Are college savings already pretty well funded? TSP balance? If all of these are pretty good, maybe quitting is worth considering.

Just know how hard it may be to go back. I was lucky b/c I maintained connections for 6 years, without that it would have been impossible.

Anonymous wrote:Why are you counting daycare against your salary alone and not your overall HHI??

You are an idealist, aren't you? Silly question.

I would focus less on what you are netting out and more on what you want in your life. Will you get more fulfillment out of being a SAHM or having a career? There is no right answer - different people would answer this differently. At least you have a choice and money isn't driving it one way or another.

OP, do you really want to spend all day taking care of twin babies and a needy 3 yr old? That sounds exhausting to me. I couldn't mentally handle never having a break. I was home for six months with an infant and three yr old and it was much more difficult for me personally.
We are just now digging out of the years of daycare bills since our oldest started school. I've been fortunate that my government agency allows flex time and telework, and I'm happy I stuck it out to get to this point. It wasn't family friendly when my kids were younger though, this has recently changed.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would probably keep the job. Your kids will only need a nanny for so much longer before they start school. Good government jobs are hard to come by.

I worked for awhile to pay the nanny too. It is temporary. I would keep the job.

I followed this advice also but what I noticed is that preschool costs almost as much as the nanny. Government salaries don't adjust adequately against inflation - fuel prices, food, housing, etc. Now, I'm actually in DEBT because I decided to continue working.

OP, I wish I had decided to stay at home then with my LOs. We would at least be breaking even now and I would be much lower stress and happier.

Do you fully max out your TSP?

i wouldn't do it, personally.

The money you AND YOUR HUSBAND pay for the nanny is what allows you BOTH to earn BOTH your salaries. My ex and I pay about $15K for our daughter's preschool. That $15K allows me to earn $100K and him to earn $100K. That's a pretty good deal. Once one of your kids is in school, you can crunch the numbers and see if daycare for two plus aftercare for one is more or less than the nanny. And so on.

You say you net 1200 from your job after the nanny costs, but are still pulling out of savings. It would seem that if you quit your family would be in a larger hole financially, even short term. If you are net positive 14k/year (1200/month) from your job, then without your job you would be pulling that amount from savings as well to make ends meet.

The FERS pension alone is reason enough to keep working. With promotions and step increases govt is doing better than a lot of private industry and the TSP match is pretty generous. The younger years will be tough with the nanny costs, but financially giving up a job you may not be able to get back and all the govt benefits would sizeable.

It is also debatable that you would be able to give more attention and care to the kids than the nanny, if the nanny is good. The nanny doesn't have the distractions of running a household to take away time from the kids, as well as an end time that makes it more likely she can put more energy into things. Then you get home from work and are excited to see them and can interact with energy and excitement that might not be there if you spent all day, every day with them.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would probably keep the job. Your kids will only need a nanny for so much longer before they start school. Good government jobs are hard to come by.

I worked for awhile to pay the nanny too. It is temporary. I would keep the job.

I followed this advice also but what I noticed is that preschool costs almost as much as the nanny. Government salaries don't adjust adequately against inflation - fuel prices, food, housing, etc. Now, I'm actually in DEBT because I decided to continue working.

OP, I wish I had decided to stay at home then with my LOs. We would at least be breaking even now and I would be much lower stress and happier.

Can you see about part time? I know some agencies offer a job share. I was in your spot a few years ago, on the verge of quitting and I was allowed to work part time for six months. It was a wise decision. I still made some money and was get a better hold on my household.

Anonymous wrote:OP here, children are in good hands and not neglected in any way. Although of course I feel that they would be better off with me at home. I have two little babies and do wish I could see them more, there are days when I only see them for an hour or less. My job will not let me telecommute, I have asked many times and they don't let anyone do it. My husband is fine with whatever decision I make and has a secure job. I do think he would prefer it if I stayed home in order for all of us to eat a little bit better and avoid my long commute. I worry about giving up the career that I went to school for so many years to have plus the 6 years that I have worked my butt off to get two promotions. I will make a decision soon, I do appreciate everyone taking the time to share your thoughts

OP, what do you do? Is contracting an option for you? I managed a similar situation by quitting and contracting out my services for several years. Then I got to work as much or as little as I wanted (or rather, as I needed in order to pay the bills), at home or on-site. We still had childcare, and some weeks I worked 60 hours, but other weeks I worked 10 or 20. The flexibility and ability to manage my own time as I saw fit was HUGE for me. There is a cost--self-employment taxes, loss of matching retirement, loss of insurance (health not an issue if you can get it through your spouse, but disability insurance becomes more important), time spent managing finances (quarterly tax payments, being disciplined about making contributions to your SEP-IRA, etc)--but for me the benefits far outweighed them.