Anonymous
Post 03/15/2014 18:45     Subject: Average age of parents
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:NP. As a younger mom, I am appalled how many of you are judging us. I was under the impression the older the wiser, no? Instead some of you sit here and try to decipher how people actually could do this? Unbelievable. I am sure other moms must talk about me then. Nice to know I am being judged on my age. I didnt want to be in my 60's when my kid graduates and goes to college. I wanted to have kids instead of racking up selfish debt in my 20's. I wanted to retire and not still have kids living at home or supporting in college. I want to have an empty nest and travel/live a new life with my husband before I need a cane. I wanted to be a fun healthy mom and a fun and healthy grand mom. So go ahead and judge me. I don't care. I settled down quick and didn't make a ton of stupid mistakes in my twenties. We started saving right after college and here we are.


+1

I had my first at 21 and finished college and graduate school while I had babies/ toddlers. Being a young parent is great. Both kids in independent schools in HS. Other parents are generationally like my parents. I understand the trend toward later marriage, but there are many benefits of being young parents. Pregnancies were easy. We have lots of energy and are less set in our ways. My DH and I are growing up together and hope
we get to be young grandparents. Those who insist young parents can't be successful or send their kids to top privates do live in a bubble.


People who had babies underfoot when they were 21 years old do not send their children to 'top privates" in DC. The setting for this forum (look up at the blue bar at the top of your screen). I feel confident that there are 26 year olds sending their 5 year olds to a "top private" in some other town, someplace. They are no 26 year old K moms at Beauvoir, Sidwell, GDS or Maret.
Anonymous
Post 03/15/2014 18:44     Subject: Average age of parents
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:NP. As a younger mom, I am appalled how many of you are judging us. I was under the impression the older the wiser, no? Instead some of you sit here and try to decipher how people actually could do this? Unbelievable. I am sure other moms must talk about me then. Nice to know I am being judged on my age. I didnt want to be in my 60's when my kid graduates and goes to college. I wanted to have kids instead of racking up selfish debt in my 20's. I wanted to retire and not still have kids living at home or supporting in college. I want to have an empty nest and travel/live a new life with my husband before I need a cane. I wanted to be a fun healthy mom and a fun and healthy grand mom. So go ahead and judge me. I don't care. I settled down quick and didn't make a ton of stupid mistakes in my twenties. We started saving right after college and here we are.


+1

I had my first at 21 and finished college and graduate school while I had babies/ toddlers. Being a young parent is great. Both kids in independent schools in HS. Other parents are generationally like my parents. I understand the trend toward later marriage, but there are many benefits of being young parents. Pregnancies were easy. We have lots of energy and are less set in our ways. My DH and I are growing up together and hope
we get to be young grandparents. Those who insist young parents can't be successful or send their kids to top privates do live in a bubble.
You did it your way, and others are entitled to their way. Some people just don't want children while they're in college.


I think the point of the younger moms proving their points is because of the rude comments in the first few pages. To say things like it could never happen, not around here, couldn't afford private, must be from Virginia is offending. The only rude commenter a young mom made was about not living to see their grand kids. But I think if you are having kids around 40 and your kids will too. Well, math doesn't lie. That is a very sad reality of having kids at an older age. I am the youngest of 4 and my mom died when my oldest was 6 and wasn't around for 2 at all. It is heartbreaking.
Anonymous
Post 03/15/2014 18:08     Subject: Average age of parents
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:At the welcoming reception for K, I noticed that most parents look like they're in their 40s and maybe even 50s. In another thread a poster mentioned that s/he will be in their 40s when the kids graduate from high school. I will also be in my early 40s when my kid graduates from high school. What do you think is the average age of the parents at your kid's private?


So you had this kid when you were 25 years old? You live .... not in DC. Right? Atlanta maybe? South Carolina?

I cannot think of of one. single solitary woman I have ever met or known who had a child at 25 and could afford $35,000 a year tuition for that kid 5 years later. Even the trophy wives and trustafarians -- the not heavy hitters in their cAreers -- don't make the babies at 25 in the DC and close-in privates.


You don't think two pharmacists could afford one in private here, for example? My friends and I with kids in private schools all started families in our 20s. We don't live in upper NW but closer to other young professionals and young families like ourselves. Our mortgages are probably more modest. I'm honestly amazed that this you live in such a bubble.


I agree with PP. I never see Moms this young in my NW neighborhood or at 2 of the "Big 3" schools my DCs attend. So for the 25 y/o pharmacist mom - you and your friends are clearly the exception, and as you mentioned, you don't live in the NW neighborhoods where most with $$ and private school kids live. No judgment attached, just the reality as far as I can tell.


I understand that, but my point is upper NW is not the goal for many of us. It lacks the soul and flavor that some of us are looking for in an urban city (ethnic restaurants, racial and economic diversity). I love that one of DC's friends (neighbor) wasn't speaking English when our families first met yet they were and still are close friends. In 15-20 years, young professionals and families will probably consider the Anacostia area the place to be.


That's fine, but can you share with the class any or all of the independent schools that you can think of that are NOT in upper NW but instead are in your hipster enclaves of DC? No. Because there aren't any, save for some struggling parish parochial schools and random AME God of Light types of religious schools, and Gonazga.

So this raises the question of why, since you have no goal of attending these schools in upper NW, you are lecturing people on a thread concerning schools in upper NW?
Anonymous
Post 03/15/2014 17:42     Subject: Average age of parents
How can you tell that I'm 40++?! I look good.
Anonymous
Post 03/15/2014 17:40     Subject: Average age of parents
i had my first at 28, that is considered young around here! not where i grew up though. i had our second at age 31, and i find i'm still younger than many parents at her school. i am by far the youngest in the room at our first child's school. by far. does it bother me? why should it? i'll still be young enough to have fun and do things when my kids go off to college and some others will be in their late 60's...that said some are more secure in their careers... to each their own. i have also found that some "older" moms, for lack of a better term, make the best "mom friends" more level headed and grounded, more life experience and less competitive than some people in their 30's...
just be friendly, that's my motto.
Anonymous
Post 03/15/2014 17:23     Subject: Average age of parents
I'm on the younger end- had a child while I was in college but didn't take any time off, and continued on to professional school. Thanks to professional school and only having one child, I am able to do private education. I'm in my early 30's. No one has ever asked me my age.
Anonymous
Post 03/15/2014 16:39     Subject: Average age of parents
Anonymous wrote:We're older parents and we've been in private schools the last few years and have noticed that we are surrounded by older parents as well.

Our theory has been that most people who can send their kids to private school are older parents because they have made their $ already. Even people who are on the way to becoming very successful aren't usually there by their mid-20s. I know that I wouldn't have been able to send our child to private school had we had her in our 20s.

Of course, there are exceptions to every trend. But older parents do seem to be the rule.


I assume the same and I'm on the younger end. I was worried about this initially as I was the youngest mom in our class and I wondered if my DC would be treated differently (not invited to bday parties or play dates), but my worries were totally unfounded. At the new parents reception, everyone was warm and welcoming so we made the right choice.
Anonymous
Post 03/15/2014 16:05     Subject: Average age of parents
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:At the welcoming reception for K, I noticed that most parents look like they're in their 40s and maybe even 50s. In another thread a poster mentioned that s/he will be in their 40s when the kids graduate from high school. I will also be in my early 40s when my kid graduates from high school. What do you think is the average age of the parents at your kid's private?


So you had this kid when you were 25 years old? You live .... not in DC. Right? Atlanta maybe? South Carolina?

I cannot think of of one. single solitary woman I have ever met or known who had a child at 25 and could afford $35,000 a year tuition for that kid 5 years later. Even the trophy wives and trustafarians -- the not heavy hitters in their cAreers -- don't make the babies at 25 in the DC and close-in privates.


You don't think two pharmacists could afford one in private here, for example? My friends and I with kids in private schools all started families in our 20s. We don't live in upper NW but closer to other young professionals and young families like ourselves. Our mortgages are probably more modest. I'm honestly amazed that this you live in such a bubble.


I agree with PP. I never see Moms this young in my NW neighborhood or at 2 of the "Big 3" schools my DCs attend. So for the 25 y/o pharmacist mom - you and your friends are clearly the exception, and as you mentioned, you don't live in the NW neighborhoods where most with $$ and private school kids live. No judgment attached, just the reality as far as I can tell.


I understand that, but my point is upper NW is not the goal for many of us. It lacks the soul and flavor that some of us are looking for in an urban city (ethnic restaurants, racial and economic diversity). I love that one of DC's friends (neighbor) wasn't speaking English when our families first met yet they were and still are close friends. In 15-20 years, young professionals and families will probably consider the Anacostia area the place to be.


Ethnic restaurants? Seriously?? People who don't speak English?? You're the one living in the bubble. Those are pretty much EVERYWHERE in the metro DC area. And the best ethnic restaurants are not the overpriced hipster places on 14th St., but rather the authentic ones out in the suburbs.

But in all honestly, this discussion is ridiculous. The vitriol between older and younger parents here is silly. People make different choices in their lives, some have no control over things and take a different path. One is not better than the other. Just different.


I never said where I lived, but I guess you just wanted to argue.
Anonymous
Post 03/15/2014 15:41     Subject: Average age of parents
We're older parents and we've been in private schools the last few years and have noticed that we are surrounded by older parents as well.

Our theory has been that most people who can send their kids to private school are older parents because they have made their $ already. Even people who are on the way to becoming very successful aren't usually there by their mid-20s. I know that I wouldn't have been able to send our child to private school had we had her in our 20s.

Of course, there are exceptions to every trend. But older parents do seem to be the rule.
Anonymous
Post 03/15/2014 15:19     Subject: Average age of parents
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:When I attended DC's admission reception for preK - I noticed that I was definitely the youngest parent (32) in the room by a wide margin. Most of the parents were closer to 40 or 45. There were even a couple of older men in their mid to late 50s.


Good to hear! That's me (early 40's) and my DH (early 50's).
Not to worry. You and DH are far, far from alone.
Anonymous
Post 03/15/2014 14:45     Subject: Average age of parents
Anonymous wrote:When I attended DC's admission reception for preK - I noticed that I was definitely the youngest parent (32) in the room by a wide margin. Most of the parents were closer to 40 or 45. There were even a couple of older men in their mid to late 50s.


Good to hear! That's me (early 40's) and my DH (early 50's).
Anonymous
Post 03/15/2014 14:38     Subject: Average age of parents
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:NP. As a younger mom, I am appalled how many of you are judging us. I was under the impression the older the wiser, no? Instead some of you sit here and try to decipher how people actually could do this? Unbelievable. I am sure other moms must talk about me then. Nice to know I am being judged on my age. I didnt want to be in my 60's when my kid graduates and goes to college. I wanted to have kids instead of racking up selfish debt in my 20's. I wanted to retire and not still have kids living at home or supporting in college. I want to have an empty nest and travel/live a new life with my husband before I need a cane. I wanted to be a fun healthy mom and a fun and healthy grand mom. So go ahead and judge me. I don't care. I settled down quick and didn't make a ton of stupid mistakes in my twenties. We started saving right after college and here we are.


+1

I had my first at 21 and finished college and graduate school while I had babies/ toddlers. Being a young parent is great. Both kids in independent schools in HS. Other parents are generationally like my parents. I understand the trend toward later marriage, but there are many benefits of being young parents. Pregnancies were easy. We have lots of energy and are less set in our ways. My DH and I are growing up together and hope
we get to be young grandparents. Those who insist young parents can't be successful or send their kids to top privates do live in a bubble.
How do you know you get to be young grandparents? Your children may not want to have babies when they're 21 years old. Your way may not be their way. Or they might not want children.
Anonymous
Post 03/15/2014 14:33     Subject: Average age of parents
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:NP. As a younger mom, I am appalled how many of you are judging us. I was under the impression the older the wiser, no? Instead some of you sit here and try to decipher how people actually could do this? Unbelievable. I am sure other moms must talk about me then. Nice to know I am being judged on my age. I didnt want to be in my 60's when my kid graduates and goes to college. I wanted to have kids instead of racking up selfish debt in my 20's. I wanted to retire and not still have kids living at home or supporting in college. I want to have an empty nest and travel/live a new life with my husband before I need a cane. I wanted to be a fun healthy mom and a fun and healthy grand mom. So go ahead and judge me. I don't care. I settled down quick and didn't make a ton of stupid mistakes in my twenties. We started saving right after college and here we are.


+1

I had my first at 21 and finished college and graduate school while I had babies/ toddlers. Being a young parent is great. Both kids in independent schools in HS. Other parents are generationally like my parents. I understand the trend toward later marriage, but there are many benefits of being young parents. Pregnancies were easy. We have lots of energy and are less set in our ways. My DH and I are growing up together and hope
we get to be young grandparents. Those who insist young parents can't be successful or send their kids to top privates do live in a bubble.


I had my first at 22 right after I graduated from college. My DH and I were both in graduate school when our children were younger. He did his coursework in the evenings. I SAH so it was fairly easy for me to do mine during the day. Our children are grown. We only have one left at home and he already has one foot out the door. Our oldest will very soon make us grandparents. My DH and I are both 47. We are loving the freedom! We are looking forward to many, many years of play and travel. And most of all - lots of grandchildren.

I can see that there would be benefits to waiting until you are older to have children. But there are certainly many benefits to having them young as well.
Anonymous
Post 03/15/2014 14:22     Subject: Average age of parents
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:NP. As a younger mom, I am appalled how many of you are judging us. I was under the impression the older the wiser, no? Instead some of you sit here and try to decipher how people actually could do this? Unbelievable. I am sure other moms must talk about me then. Nice to know I am being judged on my age. I didnt want to be in my 60's when my kid graduates and goes to college. I wanted to have kids instead of racking up selfish debt in my 20's. I wanted to retire and not still have kids living at home or supporting in college. I want to have an empty nest and travel/live a new life with my husband before I need a cane. I wanted to be a fun healthy mom and a fun and healthy grand mom. So go ahead and judge me. I don't care. I settled down quick and didn't make a ton of stupid mistakes in my twenties. We started saving right after college and here we are.


+1

I had my first at 21 and finished college and graduate school while I had babies/ toddlers. Being a young parent is great. Both kids in independent schools in HS. Other parents are generationally like my parents. I understand the trend toward later marriage, but there are many benefits of being young parents. Pregnancies were easy. We have lots of energy and are less set in our ways. My DH and I are growing up together and hope
we get to be young grandparents. Those who insist young parents can't be successful or send their kids to top privates do live in a bubble.
You did it your way, and others are entitled to their way. Some people just don't want children while they're in college.
Anonymous
Post 03/15/2014 13:23     Subject: Average age of parents
Anonymous wrote:NP. As a younger mom, I am appalled how many of you are judging us. I was under the impression the older the wiser, no? Instead some of you sit here and try to decipher how people actually could do this? Unbelievable. I am sure other moms must talk about me then. Nice to know I am being judged on my age. I didnt want to be in my 60's when my kid graduates and goes to college. I wanted to have kids instead of racking up selfish debt in my 20's. I wanted to retire and not still have kids living at home or supporting in college. I want to have an empty nest and travel/live a new life with my husband before I need a cane. I wanted to be a fun healthy mom and a fun and healthy grand mom. So go ahead and judge me. I don't care. I settled down quick and didn't make a ton of stupid mistakes in my twenties. We started saving right after college and here we are.


+1

I had my first at 21 and finished college and graduate school while I had babies/ toddlers. Being a young parent is great. Both kids in independent schools in HS. Other parents are generationally like my parents. I understand the trend toward later marriage, but there are many benefits of being young parents. Pregnancies were easy. We have lots of energy and are less set in our ways. My DH and I are growing up together and hope
we get to be young grandparents. Those who insist young parents can't be successful or send their kids to top privates do live in a bubble.