Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a similar problem. I'm totally attracted to my husband's friend. Good thing we don't see each other a lot. But yum.

Do you ever give him little flirtations?

He recently shaved his beard and I told him it looks good (after shaving). I wasn't trying to flirt but later I thought it might have come off that way. We're supposed to visit them this weekend.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So why is it ok for a man (DH) to think about his wife's friends but a woman can't do the same?

women absolutely can (and do) the same - that's not the issue. the issue is whether or not someone (man or woman) takes some form of action - a married person can enjoy (abd should) flirting and the attention he/she receives. But to go out and have drinks and put oneself in a situation that can get out of hand ("I was drunk and it all happened so fast") is what many here are opposing

+1.

I feel quite the same as the PP; DW and I have grown close to a couple and I find myself connecting more quickly and deeply with his DW than I do my own! She's not even my physical type at all, but she strikes me as more adventurous, spontaneous and a more sexual than my own DW. I'm great friends with her DH though, and the absolute mess it would create... not going there, just agreeing with other posters. It's odd when it happens but just something ya gotta deal with.

I kinda want to hang around them more often primarily so this woman rubs off on my DW, gets her out of her shell some!

My husband and I became close friends with another couple through a child care arrangment. We (and the kiddos) became very close, very fast. The other couple's husband and I have much more in common (running, politics, line of work) than I do with the wife. She's nice, but not someone I could ever see being super close friends with- we do best as a foursome, if that makes any sense. One day, I found myself meeting the other husband for a drink (he called randomly as I was on my way home and asked if I wanted to meet for a beer before pick up) and while NOTHING happened, he started unloading on me about his crazy extended family and a little bit about his wife- mostly how we both find ourselves the "rational" one with the kids. He said he felt he could trust me for advice and that he was "so glad I was in his life" ... All of the sudden, I realized that this is how lifetime movies about affairs start. I immediately distanced myself from the other couple- he's attractive, but not worth that! . I love my husband and my family more than anything and I think sometimes we all have to remind ourselves that yeah, our eyes may wander with people they are not supposed to, but more than likely you'd be just trading one thing for another. I've been to this guy's house. He leaves out dirty socks just like my husband does.

Anonymous wrote:I have a similar problem. I'm totally attracted to my husband's friend. Good thing we don't see each other a lot. But yum.

Do you ever give him little flirtations?

Anonymous wrote:So why is it ok for a man (DH) to think about his wife's friends but a woman can't do the same?

women absolutely can (and do) the same - that's not the issue. the issue is whether or not someone (man or woman) takes some form of action - a married person can enjoy (abd should) flirting and the attention he/she receives. But to go out and have drinks and put oneself in a situation that can get out of hand ("I was drunk and it all happened so fast") is what many here are opposing