Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I know you want what's best for your daughter, but your suffering for years with this man isn't going to help your little girl. She will be happiest if you are happy. You could try sharing your genuine thoughts with your partner, even if it might lead to some fights, and see how you are able to resolve things as a couple. You say you have a happy home life without fighting, but it is a false happiness if it is maintained only by your concealing your true thoughts and feelings.
Sorry, but this is one of the biggest myths people tell themselves.
Kids couldn't care less if you're happy[/b[b]]. They care about their own security and home life.
OP you both sound very young and immature, but of course there is hope for this situation. How old are you both? I think it's encouraging that this man wants to marry you, grow up and live a life together. I would suggest some serious counseling before moving ahead, but I believe -- as you seem to -- that that should be your ultimate goal.
I think when people say "your kid won't be happy if you're not happy", they are not suggesting that, literally, the kid waits on your happiness to be happy. Instead, when a parent is unhappy, they generally become harsh, mean, lose interest in spending time with the family, and perhaps lose that nice bubbly quality that makes their child enjoy being with them. This in turn, makes the kid unhappy b/c their parent is now a jack hole that doesn't have any fun with them. I, personally, can tell you, that as a kid, my parents' happiness deeply affected my own.