Who THOUGHT of these "beach weeks from hell"?

And who decided they were a "good idea"?

MF!

do yourself a favor -- run!

OP, would the family be irreparably insulted if you and DH rent your own house/hotel room?

We pay our own way, and invite them to our friends new beach house that is nicer, closer and has family amenities abound.

But. They. Still. Insist. Its a mystery.

I think for most people here, paying their own way is not the issue. Most people aren't leeches, they just want peaceful togetherness. Is that too much to ask? Without the family drama, perhaps it is too much to ask. Especially when you have upwards of 20 (!) people *crammed* into a "big" house.

Pay your own way

We put up with SILs rotten attitude and her screaming kids for years. Now that her children are older, and we are the ones with young children, all of the ILs have to make a point to disappear. The disappearing takes place (just a couple examples) at the end of the week (so they don't have to clean); or after dinner. God forbid anyone ever help with our children the way they did with SILs obnoxious children.

So much of the past comes to light, they never have to tell me how horrible it was growing up in their house. Only certain people are allowed to initiate activities or conversations, its f*cked up in the worst way.

I just assume not have to play counselor all week, nor have to pick up after them. If I ever went (don't intend to), it would be for the kids only.

I get stuck watching my nieces and nephews (plus my own kids) during the day while the other parents get drunk on the porch and they all say they just assume I like it because I'm a teacher! The two days I totally refused the kids went wild and one child cut his forehead and another peed all over my MIL's bed.

Also, my in-laws love their grandkids but hate having dinner with kids around because they say they can't enjoy the food. So we end up feeding all the kids at the regular dinner time, cleaning up the kitchen and then cooking a totally new fancy dinner that isn't served until around 8:30 or 9. Every year I find myself at 10 pm standing over the kitchen sink exhausted and pissed as hell!

Don't go. It's easy. If you hate being around your family that much under those circumstances you're not doing anyone any favors.

Do something with them that brings out their best and enhance your relationship with extended family.

Why would you go?

Call everybody fat.

Go for a long weekend and save your vacation time for a real vacation. I have been on many of these trips.. There is always anxiety. Anger, and crying... I hate it

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Back out now! Just say one of your kids is sick. It is not worth it.

I sent my husband. It is his family.

Peace for me. Cheers!

agree

I've sent my husband with the kids.

total heaven

I went on DH's family camping trip one year. When we got home, I told DH that I hated camping and would never do it again. He takes the kids every year and I have great time at home. Win, win.

Anonymous wrote:We rent a house in the Caribbean that comes with staff. Grandparents, kids, and grandkids can all relax.

Bingo!

Anonymous wrote:Back out now! Just say one of your kids is sick. It is not worth it.

I sent my husband. It is his family.

Peace for me. Cheers!

agree

I've sent my husband with the kids.

total heaven

It is like waiting tables -- everybody should do it once and realize you have to plan carefully to avoid ever doing it again.

Anonymous wrote:I want to hear more details about family drama. What are the rotten things the ILs do? Any crazy reactions? Tell all!

We did this one year, never again!

DH's Princess sister never STFU!
Her dour husband puts a damper on everything. Can't wait for this asshole to go to bed!
DH's younger, single brothers show up with uninvited girlfriends and pals. They smoke a lot of weed. They don't do any of the housework or cooking. They do pay for multiple beer runs. LOL! They leave early, so others are stuck with the final clean up. They call looking for their
share(s) of the security deposit a couple of days after the rental is up. They were fun guys when we were all younger, but they aren't fun anymore.