Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Put her on budget". Seriously? OP's wife is not a child and should not be treated like a child. That is a recipe for disaster in any marriage. Working out a budget together is one thing but putting her on a budget is completely out of line.

I put DH on a budget - we have to or we cannot buy food. It's that simple - we HAVE to be on a budget. And he understands that because I do the finances and pay the bills, I am the one who knows how much we should be spending. So I don't find this sexist or out of line - it's just some people's reality.

If you are the same poster as before -- your mortgage payment is about half your take home. That leaves you scrambling to pay for toilet paper. You want to "put DW on a budget" or "get her to go back to work" but have you calculated the cost of daycare? Or the unseen cost of latch key? You are not a poor person --you are a vain, middle class person who overspent on the car and house. Also, some of these posters must not live here in DC area, or they don't care about the qaulity of the food they eat. Poor people eat Doritos and McDonalds. It can be done for mere dollars.

Yes I think it is certainly possible to get through the day w/o spending beyond necessities. Heck, I don't spend a dime the whole week (I work). I fill up my car on weekend and that lasts me 5 days of work commute. I pack my lunches and will take coffee from home if I feel like it. I rarely spending on anything else. However, all our purchases are lumped into weekend and we budget it before hand.

As for your wife, I agree as SAHM, she somehow needs to entertain kids. But if you look around these forums, there are many SAHM posts, who list lot of free stuff. Many of them are not rolling in dough. They make the best of what they have.

If your little Johny goes to a paid class every week, don't lump it into your wife's spending. If you both agreed for this class, it should be part of your household budget. Also calculate what the kids need in a given month. It is a new season and all kids need summer clothes? Budget for it and then your wife can shop as she pleases (everyday or every weekend) as long as she stays within that budget.

Some people are not good at doing math in their head. You two need to sit down, write out every single purchase and then figure out what you can afford to spend on discretionary items. If you have some unforeseen expense, such as car repair, you should reign in the discretionary budget that month. But please discuss with your wife and put everything in writing - that will jolt many spendthrifts to action. Good luck.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you buy it at our local Hispanic Supermarket on Tuesdays it is $2.95. So, yes it is still $2.95 per gallon if you know where and when to shop for it.

It's regularly priced at $2.99 at Food Lion. Every day.

Yes, but then you have to shop at Food Lion.

It's 2.99 at Whole Foods. Every day.

Organic milk is more expensive than that. Having said that, buying organic milk is essentially throwing money at the wind.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In HS I had a friend whose mom was SAHM and she would go to the grocery store every day to get fresh rolls for sandwiches. Seriously. I think it her mom thought she was doing her job as a SAHM.

Was she European? One reason they have such small fridges is that they tend to shop much more frequently so they can get fresher food. Like daily bread, in season fruits and veggies.....

My. Mom grew up in Philly and went to the grocery store every day. I think she was either disorganized or had a crush on the produce guy!

Anonymous wrote:In HS I had a friend whose mom was SAHM and she would go to the grocery store every day to get fresh rolls for sandwiches. Seriously. I think it her mom thought she was doing her job as a SAHM.

Was she European? One reason they have such small fridges is that they tend to shop much more frequently so they can get fresher food. Like daily bread, in season fruits and veggies.....

In HS I had a friend whose mom was SAHM and she would go to the grocery store every day to get fresh rolls for sandwiches. Seriously. I think it her mom thought she was doing her job as a SAHM.

Sure, I go through most of the week w/o spending money and I have 3 small children at home (SAHM). There are tons of free things to do - library, nature center, playgrounds galore, lakes, etc. In fact, there are days when I don't even drive we just walk everywhere.

The flip side, most of my spending is lumped on the weekends such as grocery shopping, Good Will store, Walmart trip to buy birthday party gifts, paying for the dry cleaner, filling up the gas tank, etc.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you buy it at our local Hispanic Supermarket on Tuesdays it is $2.95. So, yes it is still $2.95 per gallon if you know where and when to shop for it.

It's regularly priced at $2.99 at Food Lion. Every day.

Yes, but then you have to shop at Food Lion.

It's 2.99 at Whole Foods. Every day.

Anonymous wrote:"Put her on budget". Seriously? OP's wife is not a child and should not be treated like a child. That is a recipe for disaster in any marriage. Working out a budget together is one thing but putting her on a budget is completely out of line.

I put DH on a budget - we have to or we cannot buy food. It's that simple - we HAVE to be on a budget. And he understands that because I do the finances and pay the bills, I am the one who knows how much we should be spending. So I don't find this sexist or out of line - it's just some people's reality.

Anonymous wrote:"Put her on budget". Seriously? OP's wife is not a child and should not be treated like a child. That is a recipe for disaster in any marriage. Working out a budget together is one thing but putting her on a budget is completely out of line.

.

I think this is a genuine challenge for many in this area. Mr. Mustache and advice columns talk about making strict budgets and generally being cheap. That sort of thing is an absolute necessity if you're truly living paycheck to paycheck with no savings and no retirement account. However, the OP and many of us actually have a bit of breathing room, making those practices merely desirable. Being tight with money when you don't have to be is a big challenge. It's handy if your spouse was wired from birth to be cheap. Good luck otherwise.

"Put her on budget". Seriously? OP's wife is not a child and should not be treated like a child. That is a recipe for disaster in any marriage. Working out a budget together is one thing but putting her on a budget is completely out of line.