Anonymous wrote:I am trying to understand this. Is it like you washed out of Marine Corps boot camp? Please elucidate me as to how your college experience somehow drives a feeling of "unworthiness."

Well, I selected a small college known for being intensely academic. I arrived as an enthusiastic learner, confident in my abilities and hopeful about my future. The faculty and my fellow students at this college contributed to a culture on campus in which no amount of studying was ever enough, and no matter how much work you had done, you were always behind. If I were a different young person I certainly could have risen above this and thrived, but I was who I was. I did my work well, but I subsequently burned out entirely by 21. When I returned to grad school at different institutions I found that their cultures were very different, and people actually seemed to enjoy their work and stay on top of it. If my children have my temperament, and so far they do, I would not encourage them to attend this institution.

I am trying to understand this. Is it like you washed out of Marine Corps boot camp? Please elucidate me as to how your college experience somehow drives a feeling of "unworthiness."

Anonymous wrote:I went to a SLAC. I don't care if DC go there, to a state u, or wherever (they are quite young now), but what is a million times more important to me than where they go to college is that they are not riddled with the anxiety and depression that I have been my whole life.

Unfortunately I have to agree with this, and I fear that for me the anxiety and depression may have been exacerbated by the time at the SLAC. It was worse then than it has ever been since, but I still do carry a sense of unworthiness that was born and grew there in college.

Anonymous wrote:Get over it OP. Today is so much harder to make it. From 2006=12-- only 50% of college grads have full-time employment. It really matters where people go today so that they can even get a job. You probably graduated 20 or 30 years ago when people could go to a crummy state school (like my husband and I did) and get a great job afterward. We're happy our kid had a chance to go to an Ivy and yes, she has a job offer -- than God. Don't be so glib. What you did yesterday Rip Van Winkle...has no bearing today. The world is not all about you and times have changed. Get with the times.

Maybe they are choosing to major in the wrong subjects . There was a discussion on these boards some time bsck on the most employable majors being under-subscribed, and I sat in a meeting today with a major U.S. IT company that says it cannot find enough qualified engineers and programmers among U.S. graduates - esp. among Gen Y. Therefore, they are forced to look overseas for the needed expertise.

From the above article by the MIT Admissions Counselor:

There is only one coin. There are many sides to the coin, but there is only one coin. And you can flip it however you like.
So when a parent says to me, "Why does HYPSM (Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Stanford, MIT, etc.) put so much emphasis on AP's?" I reply "Why do you put so much emphasis on HYPSM?" When a parent says "My kid's value as a person/student shouldn't be measured by how many AP's he/she has taken" I say "...and your kid's value as a person/student shouldn't be measured by whether or not he/she goes to HYPSM."

Wonder how that parent reacted?

What is UMC?

Why are you so anxious and depressed.

I went to a SLAC. I don't care if DC go there, to a state u, or wherever (they are quite young now), but what is a million times more important to me than where they go to college is that they are not riddled with the anxiety and depression that I have been my whole life.

Anonymous wrote:I dunno why so much emphasis on getting into Ivies? My Dd may be allowed to apply for one or two if she has the grades and scores, but I don't want to bank on getting in. She is already drinking the Kool Aid offered by her peers and their parents that these are the "acceptable" schools. She broke down crying to me about her prospects. It is a real shame to have so much pressure on you at a young age. My advice to her is to go where it will be the best program and fit for you. This may or may not be an Ivy. You will do weel regardless of where you go to school.

This is so sad, but very typical of UMC teens today.

Get over it OP. Today is so much harder to make it. From 2006=12-- only 50% of college grads have full-time employment. It really matters where people go today so that they can even get a job. You probably graduated 20 or 30 years ago when people could go to a crummy state school (like my husband and I did) and get a great job afterward. We're happy our kid had a chance to go to an Ivy and yes, she has a job offer -- than God. Don't be so glib. What you did yesterday Rip Van Winkle...has no bearing today. The world is not all about you and times have changed. Get with the times.

Rutgers, I think.

Anonymous wrote:I went to the commuter ivy league of long island. And I make 6 figures! Can you believe it? I did go to grad school at the only school to turn down a spot in the ivy league though. I wouldn't have wanted to play those pussies in football either. Lolz.

Wait -- wait -- don't go before you tell us which school turned down a spot in the Ivy League!

Nice read from an MIT admissions counselor http://mitadmissions.org/blogs/entry/many_ways_to_define_the_best