Anonymous
Post 07/17/2012 12:35     Subject: termination at 19 weeks for medical reason
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thank you all for your responses! I really appreciate it.
10:54, I have started having second thoughts about traveling to NYC especially since my parents live in the suburbs, and it looks like the hospitals insists that I stay within Manhattan after the laminaria are placed. So I would have to stay in a hotel which is not at all pleasant given the circumstances. I prefer the comfort of my home. I don't know why my OB didn't mention anything about GW. They referred me to Planned parenthood and Washington Surgi Clinic. Both of which are obviously clinic setting. I have my concerns about having the procedure done in a clinic setting especially since plane parenthood mentioned that they do the procedure in one day(no laminar, etc!!) and the other clinic doesn't even discuss how the procedure will be done. I wish I could read the post about the risks! Too bad it was deleted apparently.
I also have fed. insurance which doesn't cover the procedure. The hospital cost in NYC adds up to 20K! So, rather than being at work today, I am sitting home debating whether to cancel my appointment for tomorrow with the hospital and just go with one of the local clinics. It is a really tough situation. I am so scared of the hormone crash afterwards that I have already made an appointment with a psychologist. I also called my ob to prescribe me with anti anxiety meds.


OP, I only have a moment and I'm on my phone, but I will try to cover this quickly:

There are risks to your future fertility with late-term abortions. Cervical incompetence is an established potential side effect of forcibly dilating your cervix, but there are also risks of infection, scar tissue, and other problems that can make carrying a future baby to term impossible.

Your health is not in danger right now. Your baby is growing and living and kicking. Carrying your baby to term will protect your fertility, rather than endanger it.

this is not true, I had a late term abortion at 21 weeks and now I have 2 beautiful children. No fertility problems.

You mentioned insurance does not cover it. The birth, perinatal hospice care, and your child WILL be covered! Research carefully, OP. termination is not the only choice.
Anonymous
Post 07/17/2012 12:28     Subject: termination at 19 weeks for medical reason
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:

I assume OP educated herself. I see no reason to hammer her over the head with hurtful details that she DID NOT ASK FOR.


How is describing a procedure to discard fetal tissue hurtful? I could see if it was describing ending the life of a baby, a child, with a heartbeat-movements-thoughts; now that would really give me pause. But since it's not, I don't get why "hurtful" keeps getting thrown around. And even still, if you are going to have the procedure, you should know what it entails.





Because even if you don't believe that your fetus is a baby, even if you believe that the abortion is the right choice for you and have decided to go through with it, that doesn't mean that the loss of a wanted pregnancy doesn't hurt. And with that, I'm moving my responses on this topic to the s/o thread, so that OP has a better chance of getting the info she asked for.
Anonymous
Post 07/17/2012 12:26     Subject: termination at 19 weeks for medical reason
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thank you all for your responses! I really appreciate it.
10:54, I have started having second thoughts about traveling to NYC especially since my parents live in the suburbs, and it looks like the hospitals insists that I stay within Manhattan after the laminaria are placed. So I would have to stay in a hotel which is not at all pleasant given the circumstances. I prefer the comfort of my home. I don't know why my OB didn't mention anything about GW. They referred me to Planned parenthood and Washington Surgi Clinic. Both of which are obviously clinic setting. I have my concerns about having the procedure done in a clinic setting especially since plane parenthood mentioned that they do the procedure in one day(no laminar, etc!!) and the other clinic doesn't even discuss how the procedure will be done. I wish I could read the post about the risks! Too bad it was deleted apparently.
I also have fed. insurance which doesn't cover the procedure. The hospital cost in NYC adds up to 20K! So, rather than being at work today, I am sitting home debating whether to cancel my appointment for tomorrow with the hospital and just go with one of the local clinics. It is a really tough situation. I am so scared of the hormone crash afterwards that I have already made an appointment with a psychologist. I also called my ob to prescribe me with anti anxiety meds.


OP, I only have a moment and I'm on my phone, but I will try to cover this quickly:

There are risks to your future fertility with late-term abortions. Cervical incompetence is an established potential side effect of forcibly dilating your cervix, but there are also risks of infection, scar tissue, and other problems that can make carrying a future baby to term impossible.

Your health is not in danger right now. Your baby is growing and living and kicking. Carrying your baby to term will protect your fertility, rather than endanger it.

You mentioned insurance does not cover it. The birth, perinatal hospice care, and your child WILL be covered! Research carefully, OP. termination is not the only choice.


Using this reasoning, then when I had my babies induced I ran these risks as well. Stop trying to scare the OP. As for describing the gory details, you too are trying to harass the OP to your perspective. I agree with the PPs, I am sure she rans through the options with her medical professional and made a decision, therefore, stick to the topic at hand - her questions not the course of her decision making.

If you have not had a Trisomy 18 (or other fetal anomoly) and faced the OP's decision, you have no reason to respond to her question. She asked for people with experience in this and only those people should answer.

Anonymous
Post 07/17/2012 12:25     Subject: termination at 19 weeks for medical reason
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:

I assume OP educated herself. I see no reason to hammer her over the head with hurtful details that she DID NOT ASK FOR.


How is describing a procedure to discard fetal tissue hurtful? I could see if it was describing ending the life of a baby, a child, with a heartbeat-movements-thoughts; now that would really give me pause. But since it's not, I don't get why "hurtful" keeps getting thrown around. And even still, if you are going to have the procedure, you should know what it entails.





yes.
Anonymous
Post 07/17/2012 12:22     Subject: termination at 19 weeks for medical reason
Anonymous wrote:

I assume OP educated herself. I see no reason to hammer her over the head with hurtful details that she DID NOT ASK FOR.


How is describing a procedure to discard fetal tissue hurtful? I could see if it was describing ending the life of a baby, a child, with a heartbeat-movements-thoughts; now that would really give me pause. But since it's not, I don't get why "hurtful" keeps getting thrown around. And even still, if you are going to have the procedure, you should know what it entails.



Anonymous
Post 07/17/2012 12:19     Subject: termination at 19 weeks for medical reason
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thank you all for your responses! I really appreciate it.
10:54, I have started having second thoughts about traveling to NYC especially since my parents live in the suburbs, and it looks like the hospitals insists that I stay within Manhattan after the laminaria are placed. So I would have to stay in a hotel which is not at all pleasant given the circumstances. I prefer the comfort of my home. I don't know why my OB didn't mention anything about GW. They referred me to Planned parenthood and Washington Surgi Clinic. Both of which are obviously clinic setting. I have my concerns about having the procedure done in a clinic setting especially since plane parenthood mentioned that they do the procedure in one day(no laminar, etc!!) and the other clinic doesn't even discuss how the procedure will be done. I wish I could read the post about the risks! Too bad it was deleted apparently.
I also have fed. insurance which doesn't cover the procedure. The hospital cost in NYC adds up to 20K! So, rather than being at work today, I am sitting home debating whether to cancel my appointment for tomorrow with the hospital and just go with one of the local clinics. It is a really tough situation. I am so scared of the hormone crash afterwards that I have already made an appointment with a psychologist. I also called my ob to prescribe me with anti anxiety meds.


OP, I read that post. It wasn't about the risks. It was pretty graphic, inappropriate and irrelevant information about the procedure from an anti-choicer. I don't think you missed anything.


Was anything in the post UNTRUE? And how can the procedure itself be irrelevant? Do you think the OP will never hear what happened, for the rest of her life?


It was not untrue. It described what happend. It said that the baby's bones are hardened enough so that the dr. cannot simply scrape the baby out. Rather, it has to dismember and scratch at it to make sure it gets everything, and then lay them out like a puzzle piece on the table to make sure he/she gets everything.

If you are going to have any medical procedure done, don't you research it and want to know what is going to happen? In no other medical procedure, so we say, "I don't want to know about it." We are all heavily educated women who demand answers and wnat to know what is going on with every medical decision we make. It you are going to undergo a medical procedure, you should know what is going on so you can assess your choices.


Really? Are you on other threads describing heart bypasses, liposuction or other invasive procedures in gory, unsolicited, hurtful detail in the name of "education?"


Have you ever been in the TTC threads? We all talk about every intricate detail ad nauseum.
Anonymous
Post 07/17/2012 12:18     Subject: termination at 19 weeks for medical reason
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thank you all for your responses! I really appreciate it.
10:54, I have started having second thoughts about traveling to NYC especially since my parents live in the suburbs, and it looks like the hospitals insists that I stay within Manhattan after the laminaria are placed. So I would have to stay in a hotel which is not at all pleasant given the circumstances. I prefer the comfort of my home. I don't know why my OB didn't mention anything about GW. They referred me to Planned parenthood and Washington Surgi Clinic. Both of which are obviously clinic setting. I have my concerns about having the procedure done in a clinic setting especially since plane parenthood mentioned that they do the procedure in one day(no laminar, etc!!) and the other clinic doesn't even discuss how the procedure will be done. I wish I could read the post about the risks! Too bad it was deleted apparently.
I also have fed. insurance which doesn't cover the procedure. The hospital cost in NYC adds up to 20K! So, rather than being at work today, I am sitting home debating whether to cancel my appointment for tomorrow with the hospital and just go with one of the local clinics. It is a really tough situation. I am so scared of the hormone crash afterwards that I have already made an appointment with a psychologist. I also called my ob to prescribe me with anti anxiety meds.


OP, I read that post. It wasn't about the risks. It was pretty graphic, inappropriate and irrelevant information about the procedure from an anti-choicer. I don't think you missed anything.


Was anything in the post UNTRUE? And how can the procedure itself be irrelevant? Do you think the OP will never hear what happened, for the rest of her life?


It was not untrue. It described what happend. It said that the baby's bones are hardened enough so that the dr. cannot simply scrape the baby out. Rather, it has to dismember and scratch at it to make sure it gets everything, and then lay them out like a puzzle piece on the table to make sure he/she gets everything.

If you are going to have any medical procedure done, don't you research it and want to know what is going to happen? In no other medical procedure, so we say, "I don't want to know about it." We are all heavily educated women who demand answers and wnat to know what is going on with every medical decision we make. It you are going to undergo a medical procedure, you should know what is going on so you can assess your choices.


Really? Are you on other threads describing heart bypasses, liposuction or other invasive procedures in gory, unsolicited, hurtful detail in the name of "education?"
Anonymous
Post 07/17/2012 12:16     Subject: termination at 19 weeks for medical reason
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thank you all for your responses! I really appreciate it.
10:54, I have started having second thoughts about traveling to NYC especially since my parents live in the suburbs, and it looks like the hospitals insists that I stay within Manhattan after the laminaria are placed. So I would have to stay in a hotel which is not at all pleasant given the circumstances. I prefer the comfort of my home. I don't know why my OB didn't mention anything about GW. They referred me to Planned parenthood and Washington Surgi Clinic. Both of which are obviously clinic setting. I have my concerns about having the procedure done in a clinic setting especially since plane parenthood mentioned that they do the procedure in one day(no laminar, etc!!) and the other clinic doesn't even discuss how the procedure will be done. I wish I could read the post about the risks! Too bad it was deleted apparently.
I also have fed. insurance which doesn't cover the procedure. The hospital cost in NYC adds up to 20K! So, rather than being at work today, I am sitting home debating whether to cancel my appointment for tomorrow with the hospital and just go with one of the local clinics. It is a really tough situation. I am so scared of the hormone crash afterwards that I have already made an appointment with a psychologist. I also called my ob to prescribe me with anti anxiety meds.


OP, I read that post. It wasn't about the risks. It was pretty graphic, inappropriate and irrelevant information about the procedure from an anti-choicer. I don't think you missed anything.


Was anything in the post UNTRUE? And how can the procedure itself be irrelevant? Do you think the OP will never hear what happened, for the rest of her life?


I assume OP educated herself. I see no reason to hammer her over the head with hurtful details that she DID NOT ASK FOR.
Anonymous
Post 07/17/2012 11:56     Subject: termination at 19 weeks for medical reason
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thank you all for your responses! I really appreciate it.
10:54, I have started having second thoughts about traveling to NYC especially since my parents live in the suburbs, and it looks like the hospitals insists that I stay within Manhattan after the laminaria are placed. So I would have to stay in a hotel which is not at all pleasant given the circumstances. I prefer the comfort of my home. I don't know why my OB didn't mention anything about GW. They referred me to Planned parenthood and Washington Surgi Clinic. Both of which are obviously clinic setting. I have my concerns about having the procedure done in a clinic setting especially since plane parenthood mentioned that they do the procedure in one day(no laminar, etc!!) and the other clinic doesn't even discuss how the procedure will be done. I wish I could read the post about the risks! Too bad it was deleted apparently.
I also have fed. insurance which doesn't cover the procedure. The hospital cost in NYC adds up to 20K! So, rather than being at work today, I am sitting home debating whether to cancel my appointment for tomorrow with the hospital and just go with one of the local clinics. It is a really tough situation. I am so scared of the hormone crash afterwards that I have already made an appointment with a psychologist. I also called my ob to prescribe me with anti anxiety meds.


OP, I read that post. It wasn't about the risks. It was pretty graphic, inappropriate and irrelevant information about the procedure from an anti-choicer. I don't think you missed anything.


Was anything in the post UNTRUE? And how can the procedure itself be irrelevant? Do you think the OP will never hear what happened, for the rest of her life?


It was not untrue. It described what happend. It said that the baby's bones are hardened enough so that the dr. cannot simply scrape the baby out. Rather, it has to dismember and scratch at it to make sure it gets everything, and then lay them out like a puzzle piece on the table to make sure he/she gets everything.

If you are going to have any medical procedure done, don't you research it and want to know what is going to happen? In no other medical procedure, so we say, "I don't want to know about it." We are all heavily educated women who demand answers and wnat to know what is going on with every medical decision we make. It you are going to undergo a medical procedure, you should know what is going on so you can assess your choices.
Anonymous
Post 07/17/2012 11:51     Subject: termination at 19 weeks for medical reason
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thank you all for your responses! I really appreciate it.
10:54, I have started having second thoughts about traveling to NYC especially since my parents live in the suburbs, and it looks like the hospitals insists that I stay within Manhattan after the laminaria are placed. So I would have to stay in a hotel which is not at all pleasant given the circumstances. I prefer the comfort of my home. I don't know why my OB didn't mention anything about GW. They referred me to Planned parenthood and Washington Surgi Clinic. Both of which are obviously clinic setting. I have my concerns about having the procedure done in a clinic setting especially since plane parenthood mentioned that they do the procedure in one day(no laminar, etc!!) and the other clinic doesn't even discuss how the procedure will be done. I wish I could read the post about the risks! Too bad it was deleted apparently.
I also have fed. insurance which doesn't cover the procedure. The hospital cost in NYC adds up to 20K! So, rather than being at work today, I am sitting home debating whether to cancel my appointment for tomorrow with the hospital and just go with one of the local clinics. It is a really tough situation. I am so scared of the hormone crash afterwards that I have already made an appointment with a psychologist. I also called my ob to prescribe me with anti anxiety meds.


OP, I read that post. It wasn't about the risks. It was pretty graphic, inappropriate and irrelevant information about the procedure from an anti-choicer. I don't think you missed anything.


Was anything in the post UNTRUE? And how can the procedure itself be irrelevant? Do you think the OP will never hear what happened, for the rest of her life?
Anonymous
Post 07/17/2012 11:48     Subject: termination at 19 weeks for medical reason
Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thank you all for your responses! I really appreciate it.
10:54, I have started having second thoughts about traveling to NYC especially since my parents live in the suburbs, and it looks like the hospitals insists that I stay within Manhattan after the laminaria are placed. So I would have to stay in a hotel which is not at all pleasant given the circumstances. I prefer the comfort of my home. I don't know why my OB didn't mention anything about GW. They referred me to Planned parenthood and Washington Surgi Clinic. Both of which are obviously clinic setting. I have my concerns about having the procedure done in a clinic setting especially since plane parenthood mentioned that they do the procedure in one day(no laminar, etc!!) and the other clinic doesn't even discuss how the procedure will be done. I wish I could read the post about the risks! Too bad it was deleted apparently.
I also have fed. insurance which doesn't cover the procedure. The hospital cost in NYC adds up to 20K! So, rather than being at work today, I am sitting home debating whether to cancel my appointment for tomorrow with the hospital and just go with one of the local clinics. It is a really tough situation. I am so scared of the hormone crash afterwards that I have already made an appointment with a psychologist. I also called my ob to prescribe me with anti anxiety meds.


OP, I only have a moment and I'm on my phone, but I will try to cover this quickly:

There are risks to your future fertility with late-term abortions. Cervical incompetence is an established potential side effect of forcibly dilating your cervix, but there are also risks of infection, scar tissue, and other problems that can make carrying a future baby to term impossible.

Your health is not in danger right now. Your baby is growing and living and kicking. Carrying your baby to term will protect your fertility, rather than endanger it.

You mentioned insurance does not cover it. The birth, perinatal hospice care, and your child WILL be covered! Research carefully, OP. termination is not the only choice.
Anonymous
Post 07/17/2012 11:41     Subject: termination at 19 weeks for medical reason
OP, are you working with Georgetown for genetic counseling? Hopefully you have another resource you can call (maybe the counselor from the NYC hospital?). I know there are other options. Just thinking that Georgtown may not have the best info due to the pro-life stance of the hospital.
The homone crash is the same as I had after miscarriage, with added emotional fallout. Everyone grieves differently and at their own pace.
I did get a good piece of advice from a counselor at Children's. She said that if we were going down this road, to make the decision and make it once. Fortunately my husband and I were in agreement and very supportive to one another, and so were our families. If there is tension with your husband or partner than counseling can be very helpful. You will be vulnerable for a while, and you do need to protect yourself to some extent from judgmental people.
Anonymous
Post 07/17/2012 11:36     Subject: Re:termination at 19 weeks for medical reason
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP has not made her choice until the procedure is underway, and even then, she could change her mind. This choice is forever. Would it really be better for her to hear what the procedure entails afterwards? What kind of paternalism is that, Jeff?

There was nothing abusive in the post you deleted. Was it too effective?


No, it's just that Jeff is anti-choice and promotes that through his selective deletions on any thread about abortion.

Women have a right to be exposed to the different perspectives and information offered in these types of conversations.


This is not a thread about a choice. The choice has been made. Stop assuming that, just because OP didn't make the choice you wanted her to, she didn't have access to all the information. The default shouldn't be that women are dumb.

OP has asked for specific information. You are offering her other, hurtful information that is not relevant. It's cruel. Knock it off.


This is absolutely bizarre. If she can't tolerate the posts which have been offered in this thread -- none of which are combative, rude or judgmental - perhaps she hasn't fully vetted her choice? And I disagree; no choice has been made until it is acted upon. I personally find it far more insulting to women to pat them on the head with a "there there honey" and not share different perspectives on a topic, even one as emotional as this one. She can handle it, and perhaps something written here will help her (or even another DCUM reader) in either the short or long-term, regardless of what she winds up doing with her baby.

By the way, the previous posts (one of which seems to have been deleted now?) were not mine.
Anonymous
Post 07/17/2012 11:34     Subject: Re:termination at 19 weeks for medical reason
Hi OP

I posted yesterday having terminated at 12 wks for T18. I ha dthe procedure at the clinic in Rockville, although I consider WHC too. If you would like to ask me questions off of DCUM you can email me at annlikesred2@gmail.com.

I am sorry your post was hijacked. Ignore them.

Anonymous
Post 07/17/2012 11:31     Subject: termination at 19 weeks for medical reason
I would feel confident with Planned Parenthood. They are professionals and compassionate.