Since middle school (now in high school) I have had problems with school administrators and councilors forgetting my child's disability and the info. in her IEP and thus requiring her to handle situations on the same level as a general education student. My daughter's mental deficits make it difficult for her to adjust to change and appropriately weigh her options when problems arise. She can have melt down moments if staff do not handle the situation appropriately. She does give special verbal cues that are signal that she is becoming agitated and overloaded in specific situations before complete meltdowns occur. There are also steps that can be taken once she is in meltdown mode to help her regain her composure.

This past week I had a conversation with the counselor in which she said it was school expectations that a high school child can do XYZ. I said I would agree if my child did not have special needs. I can see that my younger child can do XYZ but she is a general education student. I told the counselor that if she would read my daughter's confidential file including the full IEP, then she would realize my daughter is unable to do XYZ and the actions by school staff had violated my daughter's IEP and led to the meltdown we were discussing.

An IEP including one with a FBA is only as good as good as the staff who take the time to read it and is knowledgeable on its implementation. In my daughter's case, she has a well written IEP but no one reads the full IEP.

Anonymous wrote:THIS THREAD IS YEARS OLD.

But the issues remain.

Anonymous wrote:This is two years old, but thought OP to be interesting.

Amazing how the same issues drag on, huh?

THIS THREAD IS YEARS OLD.

"Harsh" needs to be clearly defined.

Anonymous wrote:Doesn't everyone want to protect their kids from harsh discipline?

I hope this wasn't a flip question. I'm not OP, but I do think that all kids need to be protected from harsh discipline, simply because ruling by fear is not an effective way to manage the classroom or permanently change behavior. My youngest child has an LD, but my oldest child does not. The stories I hear from the oldest DC about some of the magnet teachers at her MCPS magnet middle school program make me want to cry -- teachers who yell, humiliate, and denigrate to manage the classroom. It's hard on my DC when she has been caught on the brunt end of it, hard on my DC to watch and hard on the other kids (some of whom I suspect have ADD, but not all obviously) who are battered by what I consider to be verbal abuse. I have also seen this behavior from teachers in elementary, although it seems more uncommon in those who teach the younger ones. No child should have to be subject to this kind of discipline.

Unfortunately, IME, system doesn't view this as a problem. I know of one teacher who has had multiple complaints about comments she has made to students, but no consequences ensue. In fact, quite the reverse -- some kids have dropped out (or more correctly been driven out) of the magnet program due to this verbal abuse, but the system chooses to see them as students who "couldn't hack it" rather than acknowledging that there is a problem with a teacher. As long as there is no physical or sexual abuse, the system tolerates quite a lot of verbal abuse by teachers.

Anonymous wrote:OP here. My question on this thread was simply - what is the process to getting my child protection from harsh punishment/discipline at school? This question can be answered without opening up a new and separate discussion or debate as to what constitutes "harsh" discipline. The question as to what truly constitutes harsh discipline is not for DCUMer's to debate or decide, after all, it is for me, my husband, an attorney (which we're seeking), my child's psychiatrist, and the school to decide. I wasn't asking for you to get in on this discussion too.

So it does beg the question - why do some PP's need to know what the actual discipline or punishment was and why do some PP's need to know what the misbehavior was if this issue will be decided by our school and his psychiatrist and attorney? The only reason I can fathom is to ensure that I not be permitted to allow my child to "get away" from appropriate disciplining for his misbehavior by opening up a debate first, determining if it warrants protection in an IEP, and then deciding whether support for me or my child is justified. So if you are one of those people who needs to determine if my child is worthy of protection here first, I would suggest you ignore this thread and get on another one of the threads available to you in the SN forum. You're looking to stir the pot and I'm not interested in giving you a mixing spoon.

OP, you sound very defensive and easily agitated and my suggestion is when you deal with the school you need to leave your baggage at the door. They need to see you as a reasonable, rational, open-minded and empathetic person so that they hear the message and can collaborate with you whether than focusing on walking on eggshells with you and calling in extra personnel to the team meeting to help enlighten you. It is COMPLETELY reasonable for people to need more details to answer your question. You were incredibly vague and then you got agitated when people requested more information.

This is two years old, but thought OP to be interesting.

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Sorry, not going into the details of what my child did or what kind of punishment he received. I've been on DCUM long enough to know that too much information that isn't absolutely necessary can send a simple question on a runaway train into never never land. LOL I never said any discipline is harsh. Nor did I say or infer that my child should be given a free pass because he's special needs. Nor did I say he should have zero consequences. Nice try. Just not interested in adding more to stir up an unnecessary debate.

I just wanted to know how one goes about getting the issue of behavior and disciplined integrated into an IEP and if it has been done by anyone already. DH and I know what we consider to be harsh. If it doesn't get added into his IEP, fine. But we want to give it a try to protect our child from the school completely disregarding his legitimate issues.

Does this sound like an enabler?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Those of you who are suggesting the OP is trying to get away with not having her child receive any discipline should be ashamed of yourselves. What responsible parent would want that for their child? Why not extend the benefit of the doubt here and assume the question was asked in good faith?

OP, I would suggest a behavioralist approach. I think your child may need an FBA (Functional Behavioral Analysis) to take a data-driven approach to what sets him off, what the various preceding events are, what the "punishment" is (because when the so-called punishment is actually a reward? like, say, getting to go home? then it's not an effective punishment at all and only reinforces bad behavior. Then the next step is a BIP (Behavior Improvement Plan). This is to modify the escalation behaviors, and also the punishment/reward systems. It should be done by someone who is trained in the field, not just anyone who is on staff.

The right behavioral analysis and supports can make an enormous difference for an impulsive child who hasn't mastered self-control (for his age level).

Good luck, OP.

12:31 again. Here's an example of why the OP's question and point are to be taken very, VERY seriously:

In Mercer County, Kentucky, nine year old Chris Baker, an Autistic student, was told by his special education aide to climb inside a bag intended for therapeutic purposes as a punishment to "control his autistic behavior" on 14 December 2011. He was placed in the bag with the drawstring tightened and left in the hallway in the school. When his mother, Sandra Baker, was called to the school to get her son, she demanded that he be removed from the bag right away. The teacher struggled to undo the drawstring, and Chris emerged sweaty and non-communicative. According to the teacher, this had been done several times over the last year, but Sandra didn't know until this latest incident.


Full story here.

To be fair, this was in The South.

How exactly does that make it fair?

Easily the most stupid remark I've ever read. The most entrenched racism in America is in L.A., Cincinnati, and New York.

Umm . . . OK? Not sure what that has to do with the price of oranges, though.