Boy am I cracking up here..... So funny, my grandmother always says "It looks like you been eating a lot or maybe your just fat" even though I lost 65 pounds...

My mother past when I was young and my grandmother raised but her favorite thing to talk about was whether or not I was going to settle down and have kids (still neither).

Or when I go on vacation she states "did you see what happened last week over there, that girl got (it can be a number of things, robbed, beat up, etc) and you should be careful, you dont want it to be you" or the one I hate the most "why would you want to do that, back in my day we didnt do", she is always referring to back in the day crap... I love her but she is annoying...

I'm sorry for you 20:25 but that is all hilarious. My new catch phrase: What's wrong with his toes?

My mother, when my toddler cries or gets upset or disobeys, "Well, we'll just explain to him why he should x."

That's the problem. My exposition has been lacking. All he needs is an explanation.

OMG. I so appreciate my totally cool mother. My MIL, on the other hand is a complete nightmare.

Anonymous wrote:Can I do one from my father...since high school regardless of the time of day whenever he calls me the first words out of his mouth are,"are you still sleeping?". I just want to hang up. I mean the fact that I have two children a husband and full time job wouldn't have clued him into the fact that at any given moment I'm more likely awake than asleep. Ugh, I hate it.

My dad said this until the day he died. Of course now I can say: "who sleepin' now mofo?"

Anonymous wrote:When I had my first miscarriage, mom turned to DH (they were both at hospital waiting for me to come out of surgery) and told him she was glad this was happening because I was getting "too fat."

crap. That may win the thread.

Can I do one from my father...since high school regardless of the time of day whenever he calls me the first words out of his mouth are,"are you still sleeping?". I just want to hang up. I mean the fact that I have two children a husband and full time job wouldn't have clued him into the fact that at any given moment I'm more likely awake than asleep. Ugh, I hate it.

Both of my parents make all of these comments. Holidays and visits are a blast!

My parents came to town for the birth of DS...which was 12 days late. They came to the hospital with me for a non-stress test on the 10th day past his due date, and my dad was lovingly stroking my hair. I was like "aww - Dad!" And then he said "You sure have a lot of gray hairs for someone your age." I was 33 at the time. Then two minutes later, my mom says when they pull up my shirt to do the ultrasound "Wow, you really have a lot of stretch marks." Thanks a lot, assholes.

Every time my mom is with DS, she gives him these looks of pity. All the time. Like he's severely ill or something. He's a very bright, healthy, active 2 year old, but for some reason, she thinks he has a zillion different problems. She makes comments like "What's wrong with his toes? They seem really long. Is that normal?" or "Why did he throw the food on the floor? Why is he crying? What's wrong with him?" He's 2. That's what's "wrong" with him. And also? You're giving him a really creepy, sad look and it's freaking him out.

But my favorite is when I overhear her telling DS things like "Eat this so that Mommy will be happy! Drink your milk to make Mommy happy!" I always tell her that DS doesn't eat or drink to make me happy---he does it to stay alive. The number of times I have told her to knock that shit off....

It's great to vent on here, because I feel like I can't say any of this to DH, since he lost his mom several years ago and would love to have her around and meeting DS. Then again, he also finds my parents to be unbearably awful most of the time.

When I had my first miscarriage, mom turned to DH (they were both at hospital waiting for me to come out of surgery) and told him she was glad this was happening because I was getting "too fat."

"You really should watch Glenn Beck. Finally, someone who speaks the truth about our country!"

Anonymous wrote:"We thought we were sending you to an elite college to get a good M.R.S. We didn't expect you'd get other fancy degrees, move away, and put our grandchildren in daycare."

OMG

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know my mother could die and I would miss her. But I love/hate her. Sometimes the annoyance is funny. Sometimes it is spittle-flecked hatred.

Why does she call air conditioning: air-COHN-Deesh? She will say: "I have a stiff neck because of deh air-cohn-DEESH".

Why is she an anti-semite?

Why does she care if I am wearing an un-ironed shirt?

.

The answers to these are simple. She is from a different time, where people pronounced some words differently, they were expected to be more formal and neat in public, and it was accepted to put down other races in public.

See Mad Men. You'll find your mother there.

Unacceptable. I love Mad Men. But those are actors playing a pretend part. Real people are supposed to have some personality growth. I have lived almost a half a century and I am not still some hippie walking around in leather sandals with unshaved legs and unvarnished toenails--far from it! But I am more understanding of conservative view points than she is or ever will be. Sometimes a BITCH is just BITCH no matter how well dressed and polite a person is. That is my mother.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know my mother could die and I would miss her. But I love/hate her. Sometimes the annoyance is funny. Sometimes it is spittle-flecked hatred.

Why does she call air conditioning: air-COHN-Deesh? She will say: "I have a stiff neck because of deh air-cohn-DEESH".

Why is she an anti-semite?

Why does she care if I am wearing an un-ironed shirt?

.

I can't answer as to why she says "air-COHN-Deesh (nor do I understand why you would consider this to be anti-semitic). Maybe she cares about wearing unironed clothes it advertises the fact that you are a lazy slob.

Wow. You're a bitch.
My statements above about the things she says are not inter-related. Bitch.

"We thought we were sending you to an elite college to get a good M.R.S. We didn't expect you'd get other fancy degrees, move away, and put our grandchildren in daycare."

She never understands anything political/policy wise and calls with statements like "well, I just heard that the President is taking away half our social security check this month."

She makes many racist statements and when I call her on them she completely fails to see why the statement was inappropriate and/or gets huffy and says she has the right to her opinions. And, she does not censure herself if anyone of said racial/ethnic group is around.

Honestly, she's been gone for over 10 year, so it's really hard to remember the stuff she said that annoyed me.