Well OP made me laugh for the day. Especially "useless". We had an idiot mocking bird (presumably male because he, too, was "useless" and very stupid) and he kept thinking the reflection he saw was himself so he kept flinging himself at about bedroom window. Over and over and over. I asked our gardener how much longer this was going to go on. He said "Oh they learn after a week". Wrong. Years. This idiot bird would come back and bang its brains out against our windows.

Think about adding drapes on your windows that you can pull closed at night. They will block sound, light and provide insulation for a triple win.

Also, rethink your landscaping. Take out the trees near your windows.

Anonymous wrote:You called the cops on a singing bird?

Girl in my law school classed called 911 because she had a mouse in her apartment. True story.

Put rubber snakes in the trees. It will keep the birds away from those trees without hurting them.

You called the cops on a singing bird?

Anonymous wrote:the cop said i should trim my trees so the birds will stay away. another stupid mexican sheriff. then 10 minutes later the same bird is on my lawn. i suppose i should mow my lawn now.

Wtf

Get a slingshot at Bass Pro Shop and shoot some metal shot or plastic BB's in the direction of the bird. This won't hurt it, but will make enough noise in the branches it will relocate, eventually.

the cop said i should trim my trees so the birds will stay away. another stupid mexican sheriff. then 10 minutes later the same bird is on my lawn. i suppose i should mow my lawn now.

Blow gun, they are cheap and if you don't want to kill the animals, then you can use it to just scare them. I put a small hole in my wall to be able to stick a straw out and shoot bb sized candies at them.

Years ago, in my old apartment, there was a bird that sounded like a truck backing up. It was horrible.

Now in this house, the birds are chirping at midnight, chirping at 4am, chirping chirping chirping all day long. So yeah, I feel OP's pain.

get an outdoor cat.

I'll take birds over squirrels any day!

we use bb guns, my friend farther out uses a pellet gun for turkey vultures

Get a sprinkler that locks in the "straight up" position. Put it under the tree. Get a timer and have it go off every hour for 5 minutes or something like that. The birds will stop using the tree.