Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes of course. That’s the best time to get remarried. Your love live is super important, and the kids are young so their won’t be problems with them not liking the new spouse. Why waste 10+ years being a single mom?

Huh? That's not how that works. Also, the boyfriend has a kid, so it's not just moving the boyfriend into the house.

She should not marry a guy with a kid. Too much trouble. Find a single guy with no kids.

Not good advice. Someone with a kid would understand parenting and would’ve more stake in mutual parenting as they also have one of their own in the mix. Single guy can just get up and leave.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:what is wrong with marrying a guy with a kid?

Being a stepmom isn’t fun, and he’ll be talking to the exwife and she’ll be jealous of you.

Being a stepdad is?

Of course, everyone always talks about creating a village for your kids. Remarriage is the most reliable way to do that. Just make sure your assets and estate planning are in order.

I would not. You'll end up the lead parent (working closely with his ex!!) for all three kids, and he'll help to parent his one kid and not be helpful with yours. Bad deal.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What if the man offers financial support/is wealthy?

My sister got divorced when her kids were 6 and 8, she remarried to a single multimillionaire a few years later and is so happy she made the right choice. They’ve been married for 16 years and had one kid together. Staying single isn’t always the right choice.

So the answer is - remarry if he’s uber wealthy AND is willing to share his wealth. Otherwise don’t

Anonymous wrote:List the positives and negatives of a remarriage and you will have your answer. For the negatives you might need a second page.

Biggest positive is that you won’t be living in sin and it will overshadow all the negatives.

Nope
Blended families never work.

Anonymous wrote:What if the man offers financial support/is wealthy?

My sister got divorced when her kids were 6 and 8, she remarried to a single multimillionaire a few years later and is so happy she made the right choice. They’ve been married for 16 years and had one kid together. Staying single isn’t always the right choice.

List the positives and negatives of a remarriage and you will have your answer. For the negatives you might need a second page.

Don’t. You’re just going to end up divorced again. Much cleaner to not remarry until kids are out of the house.

I wouldn't do it. My two children are a bit older and I think it would simply make life more complicated and challenging. I'm in a good place right now financially and emotionally and my kids are doing very well and our relationship with my ex isn't bad. I'm in a nice relationship with a guy who has kids and early on we agreed marriage is off the table. We've met each other's kids a couple of times but not all together. We get together every week or two and have fun and sex and that's plenty for me.

Anonymous wrote:Should I consider remarriage with 2 young boys (7 and 5)? Is it worth it? Or should I just focus on myself after the kids are older and out the house. They like my bf and he has one son of his own around the same age.

OP, I have a very sweet couple that live next to me. Both of their spouses died suddenly when they were around age 37. He had 3 kids. She had 4. His youngest was in second grade. She was the second grader's teacher. The second grader was struggling in school. A parent conference was scheduled. During the conference they realized that both were young widows. He wanted to date her. He told me that a number of women were throwing themselves at him as he had a good job in this area. He was not interested in the extremely aggressive women. She put him off for 8 months before she would go out on a date with him.

They subsequently married and built a life together. They had a very long happy marriage. She told me that since her Mom had died young and her Dad remarried and she had had a stepmother and that her Dad's first kids were treated very poorly by the stepmother that she decided to treat all kids equally.

It was not easy but they have a good life together. The stepsiblings are bonded. In fact when the grown adult kids visit I've never known whose kids are whose. During their marriage they had tough times but they worked through them. The second grader who was struggling in school was not struggling because he lost his Mom but was struggling because he was going blind.

I think what made it work was the Mom's decision to treat all kids equally as she had been raised by an evil stepmother. Both Mom and Dad were raised in a generation in which you work through tough times. On marriage number 2 they did the work during tough times.

If you are considering marriage I'd take a long time with dating (like 2-3 years). Get to know his extended family well. Let him get to know your extended family. Get to know the exes. Don't rush into anything.

It can work and some people are very happy but you have to work hard at it to have it work.

Also--if either of you are newly divorced, like less than 12 months then you should be dating others casually. No one should jump into a marriage if you have not dated others or are newly divorced.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:With full time job, household and two young kids, how do you even find time for dating?

How did you assume I or we have full time jobs?? You know nothing about my financial situation so stop assuming. You don’t know how we met, whether I knew him from before, whether I met him organically through friends or whether I dated? STOP ASSUMING and making judgments.

Cute OP, cute.

Anonymous wrote:Should I consider remarriage with 2 young boys (7 and 5)? Is it worth it? Or should I just focus on myself after the kids are older and out the house. They like my bf and he has one son of his own around the same age.

If this is not a troll post, then just the fact that you’re crowd sourcing this means NO.

Get a prenup!!