Anonymous
Post 05/24/2026 18:33     Subject: Predicting spousal support

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I don’t understand why 50/50 on assets plus child support isn’t what you should expect. Alimony is an injustice to any person. The marriage is over, but then financially everyone pretends like it isn’t?


You made a family decision for one spouse to give up earnings and do the unpaid labor of staying home and caring for the children. The alimony represents the lost earning potential from having been out of the workforce for so long.


Yea. My ex was insisting that I quit law practice for a less time demanding job. He achieved career heights and cheated caked me “nobody”. Why did you marry a “nobody” and had kids with them, lived under same roof for 20 years?

Alimony is to equalize the households for children when ex wife is too old to start anew

I didn’t get any alimony but I welcome it when other women get it as it’s only fair


Why didn’t you get any alimony?


He hid future income behind stock options
Anonymous
Post 05/24/2026 18:31     Subject: Predicting spousal support

Anonymous wrote:I don’t understand why 50/50 on assets plus child support isn’t what you should expect. Alimony is an injustice to any person. The marriage is over, but then financially everyone pretends like it isn’t?


Except that one spouse is forced to absorb all the downside of supporting and sacrificing for the other’s career opportunities while the other harvests all the upside. You can’t make it be over unless you have a magical time machine that resets the spouse’s age and opportunities to where they were before they had to stop working. Alimony recognizes the impossibility of that.
Anonymous
Post 05/24/2026 18:31     Subject: Predicting spousal support

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I don’t understand why 50/50 on assets plus child support isn’t what you should expect. Alimony is an injustice to any person. The marriage is over, but then financially everyone pretends like it isn’t?


You made a family decision for one spouse to give up earnings and do the unpaid labor of staying home and caring for the children. The alimony represents the lost earning potential from having been out of the workforce for so long.


Yea. My ex was insisting that I quit law practice for a less time demanding job. He achieved career heights and cheated caked me “nobody”. Why did you marry a “nobody” and had kids with them, lived under same roof for 20 years?

Alimony is to equalize the households for children when ex wife is too old to start anew

I didn’t get any alimony but I welcome it when other women get it as it’s only fair


Why didn’t you get any alimony?
Anonymous
Post 05/24/2026 18:10     Subject: Predicting spousal support

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP here. No oxygen for the troll.


Good, ignore them. Now there’s two!
You deserve alimony, the house, and part of his retirement.


Disagree. That’s not fair to him or his future partner.


The future partner should fend for herself and her kids. Not mooch on divorced dada who have responsibility to their children from first marriage


Future partner would probably be fending for herself, but who would like their spouse’s money going to another woman? Would you like it if your husband funded his ex-girlfriend’s life while she sits around and does nothing?


My husband was married at 18, divorced by 28 as she went to her AP. He has to pay many years of child support/allimony and pension (he started his pension at 38 and she got half)...It is what it is.


Miscarriage of justice would be a gross understatement of his situation.


This is likely a made up BS
Anonymous
Post 05/24/2026 18:10     Subject: Predicting spousal support

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I don’t understand why 50/50 on assets plus child support isn’t what you should expect. Alimony is an injustice to any person. The marriage is over, but then financially everyone pretends like it isn’t?


You made a family decision for one spouse to give up earnings and do the unpaid labor of staying home and caring for the children. The alimony represents the lost earning potential from having been out of the workforce for so long.


Yea. My ex was insisting that I quit law practice for a less time demanding job. He achieved career heights and cheated caked me “nobody”. Why did you marry a “nobody” and had kids with them, lived under same roof for 20 years?

Alimony is to equalize the households for children when ex wife is too old to start anew

I didn’t get any alimony but I welcome it when other women get it as it’s only fair
Anonymous
Post 05/24/2026 18:07     Subject: Predicting spousal support

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP here. No oxygen for the troll.


Good, ignore them. Now there’s two!
You deserve alimony, the house, and part of his retirement.


Disagree. That’s not fair to him or his future partner.


The future partner should fend for herself and her kids. Not mooch on divorced dada who have responsibility to their children from first marriage


Future partner would probably be fending for herself, but who would like their spouse’s money going to another woman? Would you like it if your husband funded his ex-girlfriend’s life while she sits around and does nothing?


That’s totally different. The ex wife and her time investment in building life with him is totally different from a mooch new GF.
Anonymous
Post 05/24/2026 18:06     Subject: Predicting spousal support

Anonymous wrote:I don’t understand why 50/50 on assets plus child support isn’t what you should expect. Alimony is an injustice to any person. The marriage is over, but then financially everyone pretends like it isn’t?


You made a family decision for one spouse to give up earnings and do the unpaid labor of staying home and caring for the children. The alimony represents the lost earning potential from having been out of the workforce for so long.
Anonymous
Post 05/24/2026 18:04     Subject: Predicting spousal support

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP here. No oxygen for the troll.


Good, ignore them. Now there’s two!
You deserve alimony, the house, and part of his retirement.


Disagree. That’s not fair to him or his future partner.


The future partner should fend for herself and her kids. Not mooch on divorced dada who have responsibility to their children from first marriage


Future partner would probably be fending for herself, but who would like their spouse’s money going to another woman? Would you like it if your husband funded his ex-girlfriend’s life while she sits around and does nothing?


My husband was married at 18, divorced by 28 as she went to her AP. He has to pay many years of child support/allimony and pension (he started his pension at 38 and she got half)...It is what it is.


Miscarriage of justice would be a gross understatement of his situation.
Anonymous
Post 05/24/2026 18:00     Subject: Predicting spousal support

I don’t understand why 50/50 on assets plus child support isn’t what you should expect. Alimony is an injustice to any person. The marriage is over, but then financially everyone pretends like it isn’t?
Anonymous
Post 05/24/2026 17:27     Subject: Predicting spousal support

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Don't bother asking here, this is a lawyer question. In my state, 20 years = alimony for life but I have seen cases where that changes based on educational background, earning potential (even if you didn't work to potential during the marriage), time left with kids under 18 at home, and division of assets. If he makes a ton and you are dividing enormous assets there is not much reason for spousal support on top of that. If you are walking away with even few million that's more than a lot of people still married have accumulated.


What does enormous mean?


I don't know he number in the eyes of the law; to me it would depend on age and number. $1.5M when she is 40 is different from $3M when she is 55. Anything over $2.5M and under 55 yo I would not expect alimony on top, but that is just my opinion and I am not a judge.
Anonymous
Post 05/24/2026 16:50     Subject: Predicting spousal support

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Any chance you can work things out and salvage the marriage?


OP here. Believe me, I tried. 😭


Is he having an affair? You are better off without him. If he wants the divorce, tell him you will expose the affair if he's having one, you want the house, college funds (he pays 100% of college costs up to 80K a year for college and grad school), 1/2 of everything and $200K life long allimony.



Agree with this
Anonymous
Post 05/24/2026 16:36     Subject: Predicting spousal support

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Any chance you can work things out and salvage the marriage?


OP here. Believe me, I tried. 😭


Is he having an affair? You are better off without him. If he wants the divorce, tell him you will expose the affair if he's having one, you want the house, college funds (he pays 100% of college costs up to 80K a year for college and grad school), 1/2 of everything and $200K life long allimony.
Anonymous
Post 05/24/2026 16:31     Subject: Predicting spousal support

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Married 20 years and got alimony for 10 years, until youngest was 16. The decision we made TOGETHER for me to do majority of parenting was honored. Also got over 50% of his retirement and full ownership of home.
Aim high.


Leech


Hardly
That PP was smart in her divorce proceedings.
Anonymous
Post 05/24/2026 16:30     Subject: Predicting spousal support

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP here. No oxygen for the troll.


Good, ignore them. Now there’s two!
You deserve alimony, the house, and part of his retirement.


Disagree. That’s not fair to him or his future partner.


The future partner should fend for herself and her kids. Not mooch on divorced dada who have responsibility to their children from first marriage


Future partner would probably be fending for herself, but who would like their spouse’s money going to another woman? Would you like it if your husband funded his ex-girlfriend’s life while she sits around and does nothing?


My husband was married at 18, divorced by 28 as she went to her AP. He has to pay many years of child support/allimony and pension (he started his pension at 38 and she got half)...It is what it is.
Anonymous
Post 05/24/2026 16:29     Subject: Predicting spousal support

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP here. No oxygen for the troll.


Good, ignore them. Now there’s two!
You deserve alimony, the house, and part of his retirement.


Disagree. That’s not fair to him or his future partner.


The future partner should fend for herself and her kids. Not mooch on divorced dada who have responsibility to their children from first marriage


Future partner would probably be fending for herself, but who would like their spouse’s money going to another woman? Would you like it if your husband funded his ex-girlfriend’s life while she sits around and does nothing?