This is normal. The person throwing the shower is not the person deciding the guest list of the wedding. Go if you want, decline if you want.

Workplace shower is the only acceptable situation for this.

It's a gift grab. Don't go and don't send a gift.

If you like them go. If not, don’t. Most likely they weren’t able to invite everyone they wanted to the wedding due to numbers. But they still want to celebrate with you. You don’t have to bring a gift to a shower. You can take a nice card. Or get them something off the registry. It really just depends on your relationship with this person.

I wouldn’t be offended. I wasn’t invited to the wedding. And I don’t see showers as a gift grabs, it’s more to me at time to spend with the individual. You’d probably see them more than you might at the wedding anyway. At wedding, you barely get to spend time with the couple.

It wouldn't bother me if it were a coworker, family member I am not close to, neighbor or whatever. Also, if the wedding is far away I'd be relieved I don't have to travel. I don't really enjoy any of the hoopla unless it is someone I am close with.

Anonymous wrote:I would not go to the shower and wouldn’t send a gift either. No question.

+1 also agree that it comes off as a gift grab and is in poor taste

Gift grab. Decline invite.

Anonymous wrote:I’d go, bring a wrapped gift, and gush about how excited you are for the wedding. Then ask the bride in front of others, “I haven’t received the wedding invite yet, though…do you have a website so I can see the logistics? Or when are the invites going out?”

Just as tacky.