Personal trainer for a limited time - you only need about 4 sessions to get the correct form in basic moves (so you don’t injure yourself) and have them start you off on a good routine. Then house cleaner.

Perhaps you can do them all, but not all at once.

Get a cleaner to come and do a one-time deep clean this month. Think of it as a reset. It will boost your mood immediately.

Then use a service like Grow to find an in network therapist. Try to find one who specializes in CBT (because it's more goal oriented). Give yourself a set amount of time, say three months. Go weekly for three months and then stop (unless it's amazing, then keep going!).

Then get a personal trainer. Also, my hack for motivating to work out is to do a workout challenge with an online workout program. My favorite is the 40 day Iron program with Caroline Girvan on YouTube. You do the workouts in order and you can download a schedule (with rest dates and other recommended activities). She offers technique guidance and explains the reasoning behind how the workout is structured at the beginning of each video. The only equipment you need is a yoga mat and some dumbbells, and if you are just starting out you can start with a inexpensive set of maybe 5 and 10 lb. This gives you many of the benefits of a personal trainer (structure, a guided program that gets progressively harder, technique instruction) practically for free, and depending on how it goes you could decide whether it would be worth it to pay someone who could give you direct feedback and hands on instruction.

Anonymous wrote:I’m confused by all the people saying that a house cleaner is the key to happiness. Do none of you have little kids? I have a cleaner who comes regularly, but my house looks like a mess the next day. I’m glad I don’t have to scrub the bathroom and whatnot, but I spend an hour tidying up every day.

I agree with PP who said a trainer can be a bit like a therapist. Obviously if you have very serious problems, you need a mental health professional. But my trainer is supportive and a really good listener.

I have kids but the cleaner helps keep a baseline. Finding time to mop regularly with kids can be difficult. Yes, I pick up before the cleaners come.

I tried therapy after the loss of a parent and just discovered that regular exercise was frankly better to calm the anxiety in my head than therapy.

I think a personal trainer is good to Jumpstart or get help adjusting to a body change (like.post partum) but doesn't need to be permanent.

Personal trainer. If you find the right one, they can act as your therapist, especially those who specialize in mind-body wellness. Tell them to make house cleaning functional workouts for you to do at home

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m confused by all the people saying that a house cleaner is the key to happiness. Do none of you have little kids? I have a cleaner who comes regularly, but my house looks like a mess the next day. I’m glad I don’t have to scrub the bathroom and whatnot, but I spend an hour tidying up every day.

I agree with PP who said a trainer can be a bit like a therapist. Obviously if you have very serious problems, you need a mental health professional. But my trainer is supportive and a really good listener.

Just imagine how much worse your life would be if you had to pick up an hour a day plus still scrub bathrooms!

Haha, that’s true. If I had to choose between my trainer and my cleaner, I’d pick the cleaner. I just don’t think it’s life changing the way people make it sound.

Anonymous wrote:I’m confused by all the people saying that a house cleaner is the key to happiness. Do none of you have little kids? I have a cleaner who comes regularly, but my house looks like a mess the next day. I’m glad I don’t have to scrub the bathroom and whatnot, but I spend an hour tidying up every day.

I agree with PP who said a trainer can be a bit like a therapist. Obviously if you have very serious problems, you need a mental health professional. But my trainer is supportive and a really good listener.

Just imagine how much worse your life would be if you had to pick up an hour a day plus still scrub bathrooms!

I’m confused by all the people saying that a house cleaner is the key to happiness. Do none of you have little kids? I have a cleaner who comes regularly, but my house looks like a mess the next day. I’m glad I don’t have to scrub the bathroom and whatnot, but I spend an hour tidying up every day.

I agree with PP who said a trainer can be a bit like a therapist. Obviously if you have very serious problems, you need a mental health professional. But my trainer is supportive and a really good listener.

Very few people come out of therapy better than when they started, so IMO it's a waste of money for the average person. I'd do the trainer because working out is important and doing it right to prevent injuries and having an accountability buddy is priceless. Once you get a good workout routing and start feeling good, you'll be more motivated to clean. Another idea is 3x month trainer and 1x month cleaning.

Anonymous wrote:I’m a therapist and my vote is for a house cleaner. Life changing.

+1 I'm a therapist and also vote for a house cleaner. Having a clean house frees up time and energy you can use to work out.

It makes me sad to see all the hate for therapy here. I know not all therapists are great, so if you need one, it's important to find one that works for you and actually helps. Of course you shouldn't go if it's not helpful!! Still, as long as you don't have significant trauma and your mental health isn't interfering with your relationships or your career, I think exercising can boost your mood as much as therapy.

Anonymous wrote:Which would you choose and why?

Regular housecleaning
Therapist
Personal Trainer

I’m pretty unhappy in almost all areas right now, but I think committing to one of the above will help (for the sake of this discussion, assume I’m not currently self-motivated enough to clean the house, work out effectively, or pursue self-help strategies alone).

Personal trainer. You will get in shape and look and feel better about yourself and your life.

You can straighten up your house every evening before you go to bed and it also start your day without clutter in you house.

Most churches have free counseling and you don't have to be a member.

In OP’s case, hire the housecleaner please. The clean space should help with your mental clarity.

In my case none. I don’t like strangers in my house, have always worked out, and find AI to be 100 times more helpful than the therapists I’ve had—they were either novice, had their own issues, felt like a waste of time.

Housecleaner. But I’m a pretty avid runner & fitness enthusiast which is great for stress/mental health and (for me) makes therapy unnecessary

I would definitely choose to have a regular housecleaner 🧹🧽🧼🪣 out of the 3 you listed because when my home is clean and in order (tidy,) then the rest is easy.

It is tough at times to motivate myself to clean my house but if my home has been taken care of that in itself motivates me to do other stuff.

1st and everytime - Cleaner

2nd - Personal Trainer

3rd - You may not need a therapist.

I’ve had all 3 and currently have housecleaner and trainer. Dealt with my issues in therapy years ago.

Do you have issues to deal with in therapy? If so: Therapist

Do you waste valuable time cleaning? Cleaner I hired a housecleaner when I was 26, a new homeowner & didn’t have much $$. But I love a clean house and thought investing my time & energy into my career would be a better pay off than cleaning my house. I was right

I’ve had many personal trainers. They’re great for 6 weeks to learn proper form, jumpstart the habit, etc. but then move on. Find a gym buddy or workout alone. Trainers are typically $$$ and you can get fit/healthy a thousand cheaper ways