Anonymous
05/07/2026 20:46
Subject: Why its almost always women putting partner's career ahead of their own
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Because most women don't want to be married to men who would take a step back and make their wife be the primary breadwinner. In my experience, this is true even with childfree couples where pregnancy/birth/parenting aren't factors. Super career-focused women are outliers although an out-sized amount of discourse focuses on them.
Over 50% of college graduates are women. Even outside of the top 5%, women are earning more than their spouse on dual working homes.
In 45% of dual-income marriages, the woman makes equal to or more than the man.
In 2022, at least, in homes in which both spouses worked, in 14% the woman was the primary earner. (https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2023/04/13/in-a-growing-share-of-u-s-marriages-husbands-and-wives-earn-about-the-same/)
That 14% is (wife primary) / (wife primary + egalitarian + husband primary). Excluding homes where either man or woman is sole earner.
You are entitled to your own facts, though.
Anonymous
05/07/2026 20:45
Subject: Why its almost always women putting partner's career ahead of their own
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:This is 2026. Why aren't more men doing it?
Because many people still have common sense. Men are providers by nature. Household and children are the primary responsibilities of women. This type of lifestyle is closest to the human nature.
whaaaaaaa? Voice from 1955.
Name a society in history where men cared for the home and children, and women went out and procured the food and resources.
Aka Pygmies are one example I can think of off the top of my head.
If that's the best you can do, I think you're coming up short.
Anonymous
05/07/2026 20:44
Subject: Why its almost always women putting partner's career ahead of their own
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Because most women don't want to be married to men who would take a step back and make their wife be the primary breadwinner. In my experience, this is true even with childfree couples where pregnancy/birth/parenting aren't factors. Super career-focused women are outliers although an out-sized amount of discourse focuses on them.
Over 50% of college graduates are women. Even outside of the top 5%, women are earning more than their spouse on dual working homes.
In 2022, at least, in homes in which both spouses worked, in 14% the woman was the primary earner. (https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2023/04/13/in-a-growing-share-of-u-s-marriages-husbands-and-wives-earn-about-the-same/)
That 14% is (wife primary) / (wife primary + egalitarian + husband primary). Excluding homes where either man or woman is sole earner.
You are entitled to your own facts, though.
Anonymous
05/07/2026 19:40
Subject: Why its almost always women putting partner's career ahead of their own
Anonymous wrote:Because most women don't want to be married to men who would take a step back and make their wife be the primary breadwinner. In my experience, this is true even with childfree couples where pregnancy/birth/parenting aren't factors. Super career-focused women are outliers although an out-sized amount of discourse focuses on them.
Over 50% of college graduates are women. Even outside of the top 5%, women are earning more than their spouse on dual working homes.
Anonymous
05/07/2026 19:27
Subject: Why its almost always women putting partner's career ahead of their own
Anonymous wrote:Men are over represented in lucrative fields. Women are over represented in lower paying fields. Doesn’t make sense for a big law attorney to step back so his 2nd grade teacher wife can lean in.
Women only earn 8-10% less than men prior to marriage. The pre-marital gap is vastly overstated.
Anonymous
05/07/2026 19:25
Subject: Why its almost always women putting partner's career ahead of their own
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:This is 2026. Why aren't more men doing it?
Because many people still have common sense. Men are providers by nature. Household and children are the primary responsibilities of women. This type of lifestyle is closest to the human nature.
whaaaaaaa? Voice from 1955.
Name a society in history where men cared for the home and children, and women went out and procured the food and resources.
Aka Pygmies are one example I can think of off the top of my head.
Anonymous
05/07/2026 19:24
Subject: Why its almost always women putting partner's career ahead of their own
Anonymous wrote:Men are over represented in lucrative fields. Women are over represented in lower paying fields. Doesn’t make sense for a big law attorney to step back so his 2nd grade teacher wife can lean in.
Why are there more female biglaw associates than males but substantially more male partners and counsel?
Anonymous
05/07/2026 19:21
Subject: Why its almost always women putting partner's career ahead of their own
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:This is 2026. Why aren't more men doing it?
Because many people still have common sense. Men are providers by nature. Household and children are the primary responsibilities of women. This type of lifestyle is closest to the human nature.
whaaaaaaa? Voice from 1955.
Name a society in history where men cared for the home and children, and women went out and procured the food and resources.
Anonymous
05/07/2026 19:19
Subject: Why its almost always women putting partner's career ahead of their own
Anonymous wrote:Men are over represented in lucrative fields. Women are over represented in lower paying fields. Doesn’t make sense for a big law attorney to step back so his 2nd grade teacher wife can lean in.
This income differential is common (even when the woman is not working a lower paying job, she still statistically is getting paid less for the same job) and compounded by the fact that many women marry someone older, so the older man is higher earning due to more years of work experience. So if the economics say the lower paid person steps back then it’s still more likely to be the woman.
Anonymous
05/07/2026 19:07
Subject: Why its almost always women putting partner's career ahead of their own
Men are over represented in lucrative fields. Women are over represented in lower paying fields. Doesn’t make sense for a big law attorney to step back so his 2nd grade teacher wife can lean in.
Anonymous
05/07/2026 18:59
Subject: Why its almost always women putting partner's career ahead of their own
This thread makes me so thankful I’m a lesbian married to a woman.
Anonymous
05/07/2026 18:49
Subject: Why its almost always women putting partner's career ahead of their own
Anonymous wrote:In general, it’s unmanly when a man slow pedals his career and lets his wife do the heavy lifting. Maybe some outlier women are okay with that but most will get the ick. It’s human nature.
Go back to the 1950s!!!!
Anonymous
05/07/2026 18:48
Subject: Why its almost always women putting partner's career ahead of their own
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:This is 2026. Why aren't more men doing it?
Because many people still have common sense. Men are providers by nature. Household and children are the primary responsibilities of women. This type of lifestyle is closest to the human nature.
whaaaaaaa? Voice from 1955.
Anonymous
05/07/2026 18:45
Subject: Why its almost always women putting partner's career ahead of their own
Because women think men who stay home and focus on their families are not masculine and much less de desirable as partners.
Maybe not every woman but many
Maybe not every woman but many
Anonymous
05/07/2026 18:36
Subject: Why its almost always women putting partner's career ahead of their own
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:In general, it’s unmanly when a man slow pedals his career and lets his wife do the heavy lifting. Maybe some outlier women are okay with that but most will get the ick. It’s human nature.
False. It’s societal conditioning.
I can’t think of anything less masculine than men with so little confidence they don’t lean into their families.
DP. You have to ignore all of human history to believe that.