Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have always gotten good feedback on my management and I realized recently that I was a good manager because I had good people who reported to me.

Having a crappy direct report is a different kind of leadership and I am learning for the first time that you can't treat a terrible employee like you want to be treated.

Ain’t that the truth. But maybe change your framing. Don’t confuse holding people accountable with treating people poorly. You can treat people kindly and still insist on accountability. They may hate you, but it’s a them problem, not a you problem.

Until they get a job in the Trump administration and start using their power to @#$% over your company or agency. Unfortunately.

Anonymous wrote:all work teams should have planning, daily standups and then review meetings in 2 weeks cycles or else they are slacking.

This is terrible advice. People should be given time to work. Meetings are not work.

Anonymous wrote:I have always gotten good feedback on my management and I realized recently that I was a good manager because I had good people who reported to me.

Having a crappy direct report is a different kind of leadership and I am learning for the first time that you can't treat a terrible employee like you want to be treated.

Ain’t that the truth. But maybe change your framing. Don’t confuse holding people accountable with treating people poorly. You can treat people kindly and still insist on accountability. They may hate you, but it’s a them problem, not a you problem.

I have always gotten good feedback on my management and I realized recently that I was a good manager because I had good people who reported to me.

Having a crappy direct report is a different kind of leadership and I am learning for the first time that you can't treat a terrible employee like you want to be treated.

Managers are never the best employees or even the best at what they do. Most employee problems stem from managers who should not be in that role and yet they fail to see their own shortcomings.

all work teams should have planning, daily standups and then review meetings in 2 weeks cycles or else they are slacking.

The last response is excellent. My issue I am struggling with is my core value system is stuck in past where everyone is driven by work, getting promoted, getting recognition, kissing up, FaceTime, getting MBAs, wanting to speak at conferences, run meetings, invited key meetings, getting opportunities to manage, getting certifications, being very proactive, you almost have to hold them back.

But today I have people who work is not very important to them. Most don’t even care about promotions or big raises and don’t even want to manage people, they want to WFH, log off at exact moment possible and barely interact with coworkers unless have to for work and no interest leading projects.

So I am at a loss to motivate them other than being a drill master. Which I hate.

Anonymous wrote:Women are the worst managers I have had. And they treat the women even worse. It's just been my personal experience.

I find that bad female managers are actively bad and bad male managers are passively bad. I think it makes bad women managers look worse because you can point to specific things they did that are horrible, but the bad male managers are equally maddening in that they tend to do things like let problems fester, avoid responsibility, only manage up, take credit for everything, etc. Also in my experience bad male managers move around a lot (and move up!) while you get stuck with bad female managers longer. Peter Principle works more for men, its why you eventually end up with incompetent CEOs and VPs.

I am a fantastic female manager and I became that way by making an effort to not do the things I hate in managers and to try and do the things I wish good managers would do. Be predictable, responsive, clear about expectations, and consistent; share information, try and minimize surprises, share credit/take blame (instead of the other way around), actually deal with problem people, etc. You gotta remember you're management now and not president of the union (there is a divide), but you also need to manage the people you manage and not just suck up to leadership.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have your back, you have my back

I roll up my sleeves, no task is too small and no title will prevent me from helping out during crunch time

I don't monitor or babysit, if I get wind of someone not performing (which I have in the past) I re-train and spend time with the individual to feel out what the disconnect/issue is

LISTEN more than I talk

Award high performers beyond the annual review cycle

Weekly one on one's are scheduled as a placeholder but if we have nothing to talk about, it gets canceled why force it?

Open door/open communication

You sound like a bad leader to some people according to Leadership Challenge training I received. I say that as you are prescribing your core value system to others. What you described may be perfect some people if their core value system aligns your core value system. Plus you are mixing in a God complex. Like the new mother in law going into kitchen at first Thanksgiving dinner to roll up her sleeves and show that new daughter in law the right way to cook.

Your approach will work for most. But it is missing looking at the total person, when you ask how are you it should be a deep meaningful conversation. You are just focused work, divorce, death, illness, financial troubles are often root causes of poor performance. Roll up your sleeves is not right approach for an employee whose real issue is problems at home that need your emotional support.

PP - you keep talking about this one training you did like a recent convert to a new religion, but have you ever actually managed people?

I agree with the PP wholeheartedly, and I'm someone who has seen a bunch of leadership/management fads come and go. [b]The bottom line to being a good manager is clear expectations, giving people the tools to meet those expectations, and holding them accountable when they do not. And, yes, never letting them believe I'm not working exactly as hard as I'm asking them to work. If I have to roll up my sleeves and make copies, or edit a report because a direct report had a personal emergency, then I'll do that.

I am a good manager *because* of these tenets, which include taking hard decisions. Rarely are those hard decisions termination, but they can be performance improvement plans or simply refusing to engage in routine promotions. This is premised on making sure the team functions effectively, giving credit for successes, and taking blame for mistakes.

It's not rocket science and doesn't require a special training, but not everyone can do it, and that's okay too.

I am also fed manager and 100% agree with this. You can be a strong leader and also be a compassionate. In addition to holding my team accountable, I am supportive of them individually when someone faces a personal issue like death, divorce or others you mentioned. That support is part of "rolling up your sleves" as a manger. If you have awareness of the work your employee is doing and they need to take leave, you are there to step in and pick up the slack or reassign it to another team member without too much disruption.

I also agree with PP's recognition of good work when it happens and not just during performance reviews. I do an end of week email every Friday afternoon to highlight administrative emails, office-wide requests (i.e. "everyone fill out this spreadsheet by X date"), and I also use that space to highlight individual "small wins" and "great news to celebrate." I have limited ability to give bonuses and time off awards, but when someone finishes a big project, or gets praise from a higher up, I always try to do a STAR award.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have your back, you have my back

I roll up my sleeves, no task is too small and no title will prevent me from helping out during crunch time

I don't monitor or babysit, if I get wind of someone not performing (which I have in the past) I re-train and spend time with the individual to feel out what the disconnect/issue is

LISTEN more than I talk

Award high performers beyond the annual review cycle

Weekly one on one's are scheduled as a placeholder but if we have nothing to talk about, it gets canceled why force it?

Open door/open communication

You sound like a bad leader to some people according to Leadership Challenge training I received. I say that as you are prescribing your core value system to others. What you described may be perfect some people if their core value system aligns your core value system. Plus you are mixing in a God complex. Like the new mother in law going into kitchen at first Thanksgiving dinner to roll up her sleeves and show that new daughter in law the right way to cook.

Your approach will work for most. But it is missing looking at the total person, when you ask how are you it should be a deep meaningful conversation. You are just focused work, divorce, death, illness, financial troubles are often root causes of poor performance. Roll up your sleeves is not right approach for an employee whose real issue is problems at home that need your emotional support.

PP - you keep talking about this one training you did like a recent convert to a new religion, but have you ever actually managed people?

I agree with the PP wholeheartedly, and I'm someone who has seen a bunch of leadership/management fads come and go. The bottom line to being a good manager is clear expectations, giving people the tools to meet those expectations, and holding them accountable when they do not. And, yes, never letting them believe I'm not working exactly as hard as I'm asking them to work. If I have to roll up my sleeves and make copies, or edit a report because a direct report had a personal emergency, then I'll do that.

I am a good manager *because* of these tenets, which include taking hard decisions. Rarely are those hard decisions termination, but they can be performance improvement plans or simply refusing to engage in routine promotions. This is premised on making sure the team functions effectively, giving credit for successes, and taking blame for mistakes.

It's not rocket science and doesn't require a special training, but not everyone can do it, and that's okay too.

Anonymous wrote:I have your back, you have my back

I roll up my sleeves, no task is too small and no title will prevent me from helping out during crunch time

I don't monitor or babysit, if I get wind of someone not performing (which I have in the past) I re-train and spend time with the individual to feel out what the disconnect/issue is

LISTEN more than I talk

Award high performers beyond the annual review cycle

Weekly one on one's are scheduled as a placeholder but if we have nothing to talk about, it gets canceled why force it?

Open door/open communication

You sound like a bad leader to some people according to Leadership Challenge training I received. I say that as you are prescribing your core value system to others. What you described may be perfect some people if their core value system aligns your core value system. Plus you are mixing in a God complex. Like the new mother in law going into kitchen at first Thanksgiving dinner to roll up her sleeves and show that new daughter in law the right way to cook.

Your approach will work for most. But it is missing looking at the total person, when you ask how are you it should be a deep meaningful conversation. You are just focused work, divorce, death, illness, financial troubles are often root causes of poor performance. Roll up your sleeves is not right approach for an employee whose real issue is problems at home that need your emotional support.

Being a strong leader is a balance between clear expectations and trust. Instead of micromanagement, focus on the end result, giving the team the freedom to choose a path that increases their responsibility and quality of work.Even in difficult conditions, leadership is strengthened through care for people, for example, through the implementation of wellness programs that rally the team: https://betterme.world/articles/how-do-corporate-wellness-programs-work-for-gyms/ . Your productivity is a reflection of your team's energy!

i hope yes

I was not a good manager/leader. I specfically asked to return to my non-manager role. I am much happier to not spend my time doing something that I was never very good at doing.

I have your back, you have my back

I roll up my sleeves, no task is too small and no title will prevent me from helping out during crunch time

I don't monitor or babysit, if I get wind of someone not performing (which I have in the past) I re-train and spend time with the individual to feel out what the disconnect/issue is

LISTEN more than I talk

Award high performers beyond the annual review cycle

Weekly one on one's are scheduled as a placeholder but if we have nothing to talk about, it gets canceled why force it?

Open door/open communication