Anonymous wrote:Unpopular opinion:

It’s normal and it has no indication that they won’t ever “catch up to girls”.

I actually love it and make sure activities lend to being “feral”.

Take them to a creek, or to climb trees, or have them play capture the flag or back yard football,

I sent my kids to all boys school for elementary so they could be a boy and run, jump, burn energy and learn in many ways besides sitting and sitting and sitting,

I think it would benefit a lot of girls too.

Found the #boymom. 🙄

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s not the kids it’s the parenting

This. We’re a “girl family” that vacations with a “boy family”. The boys are high energy and, yes, feral at times. BUT they know when the right time for that is and we make sure they get A Lot of time to be wild and crazy in a way that doesn’t bother others. Frankly the girls are feral by midweek as well. Their parents have high standards for manners and respect and the kids meet those standards. Theres none of this boys will be boys and so no expectations garbage.

You've seen the boys with their parents and your girls. You haven't seen them at a friend's drop off birthday party with 8 other boys. It is not the same.

True, but as well brought up kids if an adult told them to cool it they would do so. Kids who don’t respond to adults correcting them have permissive parents.

Not always. The kid that is most frequently out of control or on the border in our friend group has parents who are working with him and who are trying to get things smoothed out. The kid is on medication and is working with someone because he has a legit diagnosis. But he is a kid and he does have something going on and he cannot control his responses all the time especially when in an excitable situation. He does respond when told no but he is not likely to remember that no 15 minutes later because he has little to no impulse control and struggles with emotional regulation.

All of us are aware of that. He is not a bad kid, he just needs more reminders and guidance. It is improving as he ages but he is going to be at a different place than most of his peers well into teenage years. Not gonna lie, we don’t invite him to everything because he can be a bit much and it is overwhelming for my kid as well as us. DS invites him when he thinks it is going to be fun to have the kid there but that isn’t everything. DS doesn’t tell us that but when we see who DS is inviting and to what and we can see the trend. And that is fine.

But there are parents who are working with their kids but the kids have more going on and it just takes more.

In my sons friend group there are 2 boys whose inclusion very much changes the behavior, they are just more active and hands on and loud then the others. They are good kids just more active and require a lot more supervision.

What is interesting is my son knows this and picks and chooses when to invite those kids. If they are doing something that he wants that energy, he invites them. He doesn’t invite them for other activities. I don’t think they have been invited for a sleep over or a birthday party because my kid finds them enjoyable in shorter bursts or with specific shared activities.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s not the kids it’s the parenting

This. We’re a “girl family” that vacations with a “boy family”. The boys are high energy and, yes, feral at times. BUT they know when the right time for that is and we make sure they get A Lot of time to be wild and crazy in a way that doesn’t bother others. Frankly the girls are feral by midweek as well. Their parents have high standards for manners and respect and the kids meet those standards. Theres none of this boys will be boys and so no expectations garbage.

You've seen the boys with their parents and your girls. You haven't seen them at a friend's drop off birthday party with 8 other boys. It is not the same.

True, but as well brought up kids if an adult told them to cool it they would do so. Kids who don’t respond to adults correcting them have permissive parents.

+1. It’s obvious which kids are used to adults holding boundaries and which are not.

It's really just not that. I'm the other party PP and similar to OP we are saying these boys are actually totally fine in smaller group settings like a playdate. Well behaved overall and definitely listen to No and any rules I as the host parent lay out. We have them over often and do other activities where there parents are there too (whole family stuff). Part of this is how they hype each other up. Not that parenting can't help with that but this isn't about constant everyday misbehavior. (And I do know kids who are frequently a problem, even in school, and this group I was talking about I didn't include those kids.)

Anonymous wrote:This is mostly a vent, but WTF is up with boys these days. We had a handful of our DS's friends over for his birthday and took them to an outing in public and they're borderline feral 😆. So much loud, running everywhere, talking over each other. Additionally, half of them have speech issues, struggle with reading (the activity involved minimal reading), or can't focus for more than minute at a time.

We've been doing similar things for his big sister, but the way the group of kids behave (even at the same age) is sooooooo different. It just shocks me to observe and it doesn't seem like boys will ever catch to girls.

It's not like I'm a stranger to boys either. For one, I'm a man but I don't recall my friends ever being this wild. Maybe we had a lot more unstructured free pay so maybe it's because we weren't as contained. I also coach a few different youth sports, but those are environments where boys are expected to be loud and active. I guess maby of them just don't know how turn it off these days

I took a bunch of 1st grade girl scouts on an outing recently (with substantial adult backup, the issue was not being wildly outnumbered) and they wound each other up to the point of madness. Screaming, running in circles, cartwheels and roundoffs and wrestling and breaking stuff. And that was before they all got hungry and whiny because of it.

Kids in groups always amplify kid behavior. You have to set some hard boundaries around safety and then accept the chaos. There's nothing wrong with boys being loud and wild with their friends, as long as they're not bullying or being unkind. Loud and wild is a sign of fun happening.

What I see in boys in elementary classrooms is what you will see on the news 6 or 8 years from now. Here are some of them taunting Montgomery county police in the middle of Connecticut Ave yesterday: https://www.wusa9.com/article/news/crime/illegal-street-takeover-investigations-maryland-virginia/65-39193a65-559b-4700-824d-7e9a1dde2b03

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s not the kids it’s the parenting

This. We’re a “girl family” that vacations with a “boy family”. The boys are high energy and, yes, feral at times. BUT they know when the right time for that is and we make sure they get A Lot of time to be wild and crazy in a way that doesn’t bother others. Frankly the girls are feral by midweek as well. Their parents have high standards for manners and respect and the kids meet those standards. Theres none of this boys will be boys and so no expectations garbage.

You've seen the boys with their parents and your girls. You haven't seen them at a friend's drop off birthday party with 8 other boys. It is not the same.

True, but as well brought up kids if an adult told them to cool it they would do so. Kids who don’t respond to adults correcting them have permissive parents.

+1. It’s obvious which kids are used to adults holding boundaries and which are not.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s not the kids it’s the parenting

This. We’re a “girl family” that vacations with a “boy family”. The boys are high energy and, yes, feral at times. BUT they know when the right time for that is and we make sure they get A Lot of time to be wild and crazy in a way that doesn’t bother others. Frankly the girls are feral by midweek as well. Their parents have high standards for manners and respect and the kids meet those standards. Theres none of this boys will be boys and so no expectations garbage.

You've seen the boys with their parents and your girls. You haven't seen them at a friend's drop off birthday party with 8 other boys. It is not the same.

True, but as well brought up kids if an adult told them to cool it they would do so. Kids who don’t respond to adults correcting them have permissive parents.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a teacher I am very strict with hyperactivity regardless of gender so as a result the word is out and parents with hyper kids don’t want me for a teacher, thank goodness! It does not offend me at all! I tend not to get the sped behavior kids for the same reason - admin doesn’t want to hear about it constantly. In teaching, being successful with tough kids just gets you more tough kids. No thanks. I’m pad the same either way.

So youre willfully bad at your job, which is to educate children, all children, even those with different temperments. I think we know what the word is and why those who hear it avoid you! You should consider other careers that you may be better at.

(My kids have had those teachers who "got paid the same either way" and it shows)

Right? "I'm so bad at my job hardly any parents want me as their kid's teacher!" PP only gets the kids whose parents are doing all the leg work outside of the classroom because they know their kids learn nothing all day, but school is mandatory.

My students actually learn a lot because we don’t have any room clearing or other behavior issues. Those are all with someone else. In fact I have the sped kids who need a calm, orderly classroom to function.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a teacher I am very strict with hyperactivity regardless of gender so as a result the word is out and parents with hyper kids don’t want me for a teacher, thank goodness! It does not offend me at all! I tend not to get the sped behavior kids for the same reason - admin doesn’t want to hear about it constantly. In teaching, being successful with tough kids just gets you more tough kids. No thanks. I’m pad the same either way.

So youre willfully bad at your job, which is to educate children, all children, even those with different temperments. I think we know what the word is and why those who hear it avoid you! You should consider other careers that you may be better at.

(My kids have had those teachers who "got paid the same either way" and it shows)

This ^^^

Ms unpopular opinion here… this is why I sent my kids to an old boys school. It’s so much better for everybody involved.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a teacher I am very strict with hyperactivity regardless of gender so as a result the word is out and parents with hyper kids don’t want me for a teacher, thank goodness! It does not offend me at all! I tend not to get the sped behavior kids for the same reason - admin doesn’t want to hear about it constantly. In teaching, being successful with tough kids just gets you more tough kids. No thanks. I’m pad the same either way.

So youre willfully bad at your job, which is to educate children, all children, even those with different temperments. I think we know what the word is and why those who hear it avoid you! You should consider other careers that you may be better at.

(My kids have had those teachers who "got paid the same either way" and it shows)

Right? "I'm so bad at my job hardly any parents want me as their kid's teacher!" PP only gets the kids whose parents are doing all the leg work outside of the classroom because they know their kids learn nothing all day, but school is mandatory.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a teacher I am very strict with hyperactivity regardless of gender so as a result the word is out and parents with hyper kids don’t want me for a teacher, thank goodness! It does not offend me at all! I tend not to get the sped behavior kids for the same reason - admin doesn’t want to hear about it constantly. In teaching, being successful with tough kids just gets you more tough kids. No thanks. I’m pad the same either way.

So youre willfully bad at your job, which is to educate children, all children, even those with different temperments. I think we know what the word is and why those who hear it avoid you! You should consider other careers that you may be better at.

(My kids have had those teachers who "got paid the same either way" and it shows)

No thanks. I’ll keep my 6 figure job, summers, snow days and holiday weeks off, and my pension. And I get great classes each year - it’s wonderful.

Anonymous wrote:As a teacher I am very strict with hyperactivity regardless of gender so as a result the word is out and parents with hyper kids don’t want me for a teacher, thank goodness! It does not offend me at all! I tend not to get the sped behavior kids for the same reason - admin doesn’t want to hear about it constantly. In teaching, being successful with tough kids just gets you more tough kids. No thanks. I’m pad the same either way.

So youre willfully bad at your job, which is to educate children, all children, even those with different temperments. I think we know what the word is and why those who hear it avoid you! You should consider other careers that you may be better at.

(My kids have had those teachers who "got paid the same either way" and it shows)

As a teacher I am very strict with hyperactivity regardless of gender so as a result the word is out and parents with hyper kids don’t want me for a teacher, thank goodness! It does not offend me at all! I tend not to get the sped behavior kids for the same reason - admin doesn’t want to hear about it constantly. In teaching, being successful with tough kids just gets you more tough kids. No thanks. I’m pad the same either way.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a teacher I often wonder if some of these boys have ever been made to do anything. Ever.

Well, as the teacher why can't you make them do something? It sounds easy, no?

thats so true boo