Anonymous wrote:Don’t nickel and dime your kids on their dinner. I grew up lmc and Ponderosa was a rare dinner out— and my mother never allowed me to get sour cream on my potato because it cost extra. Ridiculous and controlling.

Ah, fellow Ponderosa eater here! We would go a handful of times a year, and same, that was a big night out. I loved the ribeye, and I’m glad my parents didn’t deny me that pleasure.

Eat where you can afford to eat, and don’t be ridiculous about inconsequential numbers. If you can’t afford Chipotle, give Qdoba a try.

Don’t nickel and dime your kids on their dinner. I grew up lmc and Ponderosa was a rare dinner out— and my mother never allowed me to get sour cream on my potato because it cost extra. Ridiculous and controlling.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:PP who grew up in a family that didn't allow extras - I agree with the other posters who mention this isn't just about being able to afford it - it's teaching kids to make decisions about what to spend on.

So, for example- it's one extra - quac, queso, or a drink.

And while I think financial advice along the lines of "make coffee at home so you can afford a downpayment" is stupid - there is something to be said about modeling delayed gratification and decision making.

Yes! It had been one extra for years - the guac. I guess the queso add on is what surprised me. I will say that last year I got Starbucks every workday at $6 each. That is $1600 at the end of the year. I've cut back significantly in 2026.

You are kind of proving that the “make your coffee at home so you can afford a down payment” thing is stupid. Saving $1600/yr, it would take you 50 years to save up for a down payment on a $400,000 house.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We make way more than that and I've always side-eyed my husband for getting both, lol. But I also don't say anything, because I'm not trying to control him.

My kids don't like either, so that's a non-issue, but we do try to limit the "extras" just as a matter of not overdoing it, and keeping some things special. So choose 1 extra, or maybe that thing that costs extra is a special treat. One time one of my kids was super hungry and ordered steak and chicken on a salad at chop't. I wasn't involved in the order, but that would have been an example where I would have encouraged her to pick one.

I know we can afford it, but I don't think we (or my kids) should get everything we want all the time.

Same and we are wealthy. Sometimes I think: one day I will die and my kids will live better than I do on my own money. But I can see they have a healthy relationship with money. They would notice the cost of a water at place A is 3x the cost of a water at place B. I spend a fortune on travel so it isn’t like I am thrifty with all things…but on things like extras like this, sure. FWIW, my husband’s burrito at Chipotle is about $26 with guac and double meat. I think that’s ridiculous.

OP here. Thank you both. Glad I'm not totally crazy.

And this kind of mindset helps you retain your wealth.

$100 a year on queso won’t make a difference in retaining wealth. How much you spend on your cars, your vacations, your home, your kids’ education, these things are far more impactful. Denying your kid something that costs $2 a week is pointless and more likely to create distorted thinking around money.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dumbest thread.

Completely disagree, we need more ridiculous whether op is trolling or not, its really funny

I like a more classic troll. Like OP complains that the guac and queso is straining the budget, and takes a few posts to reveal the HHI is 450k, and also works in that it's too many calories and maybe something about GLP-1. Got to up the ante.

The HHI income of 450K is in the headline. Can you read?!

Can you? Pp was describing an alternative scenario.

This stuff seems crazy to me. It really doesn’t add up. Let’s say that you go to Chipotle and spend an extra $6, rent a $4 movie, get some gum for $6, get coffee at Starbucks for $8, and buy a book instead of getting it at the library for $16. That’s $40. If you or your kids or your husband do stuff like this every week for a year, that’s about $2000.

If you are making $450k/yr, you can probably make $2000 after taxes in a weekend. Speaking of taxes, you probably cannot calculate your taxes to within $2000 for the year. You also probably don’t make exactly $450k. You might make $453k or $448k. It doesn’t matter, because it’s pretty much the same.

If pinching pennies is a value that you have and that you want to teach your kids, then please, go ahead. If you think that penny pinching is going to make any realistic difference in your finances, the math ain’t mathing.

Anonymous wrote:OP there's a teaching opportunity here.
Use the toppings conversation to start an ongoing conversation on ordering etiquette when you are eating with friends, other families. For example, when others invite you, don't order the most expensive thing on the menu. Don't add on lots of extras. See what the hosts are having.
If hosts invite you for, say, pizza, don't ask for calzones or appetizers unless offered,
That sort of thing.

Ooh this is good too!
(for everyone who thinks this is literally about guac and queso, step out now; you are too stupid for this convo).

Anyone remember beach house kid that kept ordering the most expensive thing?
This is also a good lesson for kids. How to order; how to split bills!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dumbest thread.

Completely disagree, we need more ridiculous whether op is trolling or not, its really funny

I like a more classic troll. Like OP complains that the guac and queso is straining the budget, and takes a few posts to reveal the HHI is 450k, and also works in that it's too many calories and maybe something about GLP-1. Got to up the ante.

The HHI income of 450K is in the headline. Can you read?!

Anonymous wrote:Just don’t eat out if it’s that big of a deal, there.

How is being more moderate in your spending choices = a big deal?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We make way more than that and I've always side-eyed my husband for getting both, lol. But I also don't say anything, because I'm not trying to control him.

My kids don't like either, so that's a non-issue, but we do try to limit the "extras" just as a matter of not overdoing it, and keeping some things special. So choose 1 extra, or maybe that thing that costs extra is a special treat. One time one of my kids was super hungry and ordered steak and chicken on a salad at chop't. I wasn't involved in the order, but that would have been an example where I would have encouraged her to pick one.

I know we can afford it, but I don't think we (or my kids) should get everything we want all the time.

Same and we are wealthy. Sometimes I think: one day I will die and my kids will live better than I do on my own money. But I can see they have a healthy relationship with money. They would notice the cost of a water at place A is 3x the cost of a water at place B. I spend a fortune on travel so it isn’t like I am thrifty with all things…but on things like extras like this, sure. FWIW, my husband’s burrito at Chipotle is about $26 with guac and double meat. I think that’s ridiculous.

OP here. Thank you both. Glad I'm not totally crazy.

And this kind of mindset helps you retain your wealth.

Just don’t eat out if it’s that big of a deal, there.

ŹZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

Both are included at Qdoba

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We make way more than that and I've always side-eyed my husband for getting both, lol. But I also don't say anything, because I'm not trying to control him.

My kids don't like either, so that's a non-issue, but we do try to limit the "extras" just as a matter of not overdoing it, and keeping some things special. So choose 1 extra, or maybe that thing that costs extra is a special treat. One time one of my kids was super hungry and ordered steak and chicken on a salad at chop't. I wasn't involved in the order, but that would have been an example where I would have encouraged her to pick one.

I know we can afford it, but I don't think we (or my kids) should get everything we want all the time.

Same and we are wealthy. Sometimes I think: one day I will die and my kids will live better than I do on my own money. But I can see they have a healthy relationship with money. They would notice the cost of a water at place A is 3x the cost of a water at place B. I spend a fortune on travel so it isn’t like I am thrifty with all things…but on things like extras like this, sure. FWIW, my husband’s burrito at Chipotle is about $26 with guac and double meat. I think that’s ridiculous.

OP here. Thank you both. Glad I'm not totally crazy.

Anonymous wrote:We make way more than that and I've always side-eyed my husband for getting both, lol. But I also don't say anything, because I'm not trying to control him.

My kids don't like either, so that's a non-issue, but we do try to limit the "extras" just as a matter of not overdoing it, and keeping some things special. So choose 1 extra, or maybe that thing that costs extra is a special treat. One time one of my kids was super hungry and ordered steak and chicken on a salad at chop't. I wasn't involved in the order, but that would have been an example where I would have encouraged her to pick one.

I know we can afford it, but I don't think we (or my kids) should get everything we want all the time.

Same and we are wealthy. Sometimes I think: one day I will die and my kids will live better than I do on my own money. But I can see they have a healthy relationship with money. They would notice the cost of a water at place A is 3x the cost of a water at place B. I spend a fortune on travel so it isn’t like I am thrifty with all things…but on things like extras like this, sure. FWIW, my husband’s burrito at Chipotle is about $26 with guac and double meat. I think that’s ridiculous.