Anonymous wrote:Yes. We sit on our porch every morning and watch the birds while we drink our coffee. Trying to slow down and just enjoy regular life.

What makes me sad at the age of 61 is how jaded and cynical I have become and I don't know how to reverse that. I used to be very optimistic about life, to assume that most people are good people, that they can be trusted, that there is lots to discover, people to meet. We went through a harrowing spell of burying all of the oldest generation in the space of one year, people in nursing homes, cancer, people fighting over inheritances, DOGE layoffs, etc. and at the end of it I feel like my spark and genuine zest for life is just . . . gone. We are semi-retired and could easily afford to travel etc. but we just can't seem to motivate ourselves to do anything. We are realizing that burnout is a real thing. I just wonder how long it lasts and how to get over it.

Anonymous wrote:I feel you, OP--I'm right there with you.

We try to do all the right things--do well in school, go to college, get a decent job, get married, get a house, have kids, and raise them to be good human beings.

But while we're busy making a life for ourselves and helping our kids, our moms' and dads' lives were quietly slipping away.

Well, those moms and dads we left at the house back then is where we find ourselves today. The kids are moving on. Our careers are winding down. The state of our parents--if they're even still around--is depressing. And, for us? We get to hear about yet another health concern from our doctor at every annual check up.

I'll offer this, OP. I'm a 57yo Black man. It's no secret that Black males in the U.S. have the lowest life expectancy of any major demographic group. I can't ignore that. But in the last few years, I kind of feel like I've figured out how to "slow life down" for me.

I pause-out of the blue--a lot. I just stop and really take in the moment. Doesn't even have to be anything special going on. I look at faces. I listen to voices.

When I eat, I try to really think about the taste of the food. Where it came from. I think about the plant or the animal. And I'm thankful for it.

I take more pictures of ordinary moments. It might be of me and the family eating sandwiches. The dogs sleeping together. DW reading. Or, the sky.

I say I love you. Often. And I try to get in more hugs.

I know. None of this is particularly genius. But these things have helped me be more present and to try to live with deeper intention. To take it all in--with an appreciation that I am here to witness it all. Helen Keller wrote a profound essay in 1933, "Three Days to See". I read it every couple of years to remind myself that while my time is indeed limited, I'm gonna try to "suck the marrow out of life" while I'm here.

Good luck, OP. You are not alone.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m the same age, OP, and I’m basically ready to die right now. Trump has ruined everything, and I just don’t want to be here anymore. I feel sad that I might not see any grandchildren, but at this point I’m so sad about our situation and do angry at Trump that I just would prefer to die.

I get it. It isn’t Trump himself, but the reaction of all his supporters. The celebration of cruelty and stupidity that they relish. It does make you despair of humanity.

Anonymous wrote:I feel you, OP--I'm right there with you.

We try to do all the right things--do well in school, go to college, get a decent job, get married, get a house, have kids, and raise them to be good human beings.

But while we're busy making a life for ourselves and helping our kids, our moms' and dads' lives were quietly slipping away.

Well, those moms and dads we left at the house back then is where we find ourselves today. The kids are moving on. Our careers are winding down. The state of our parents--if they're even still around--is depressing. And, for us? We get to hear about yet another health concern from our doctor at every annual check up.

I'll offer this, OP. I'm a 57yo Black man. It's no secret that Black males in the U.S. have the lowest life expectancy of any major demographic group. I can't ignore that. But in the last few years, I kind of feel like I've figured out how to "slow life down" for me.

I pause-out of the blue--a lot. I just stop and really take in the moment. Doesn't even have to be anything special going on. I look at faces. I listen to voices.

When I eat, I try to really think about the taste of the food. Where it came from. I think about the plant or the animal. And I'm thankful for it.

I take more pictures of ordinary moments. It might be of me and the family eating sandwiches. The dogs sleeping together. DW reading. Or, the sky.

I say I love you. Often. And I try to get in more hugs.

I know. None of this is particularly genius. But these things have helped me be more present and to try to live with deeper intention. To take it all in--with an appreciation that I am here to witness it all. Helen Keller wrote a profound essay in 1933, "Three Days to See". I read it every couple of years to remind myself that while my time is indeed limited, I'm gonna try to "suck the marrow out of life" while I'm here.

Good luck, OP. You are not alone.