Anonymous wrote:A writer and therapist named Lindsey Mackereth posits that “giftedness” is actually a form of neurodivergence, and as a former gifted kid with a gifted child it resonated with me. It’s different brain wiring that comes with its advantages and disadvantages. It’s not the same as being a good student or being able to accomplish things, which are what matters.

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Anonymous wrote:If the issue is just that the kid is gifted, the child should be able to supplement with personal work. Most likely the child is neurodiverse, and the parent's behavior indicates it might be hereditary.

I think you are correct! The child does not seem neurodiverse but I think the mother perhaps is. Does that mean I should give the mother a break?

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Anonymous wrote:If the issue is just that the kid is gifted, the child should be able to supplement with personal work. Most likely the child is neurodiverse, and the parent's behavior indicates it might be hereditary.

Yeah, I thought my kids were gifted readers when they were actually hyperlexic. If you want to get under the mom's skin, you want to imply that the kid isn't actually gifted might need to be tested for something. "Is she bored or having social difficulties? Have you thought about looking into resources like a social skills class?"
The one that gets me is when these individuals refer to themselves as "gifted parents" - as in "I was talking with another gifted parent the other day." No, no, don't talk to me. I'm a SPED parent. I'm not gifted. I need special resources because I'm a little slow.

Anonymous wrote:They are no more annoying than the sports parents who are convinced their kid is going pro. Also, as a parent of a 2E kid, gifted isn't all that. Some of them have poor executive functioning skills and struggle academically compared to their high-achieving but less "gifted" peers. The kids with really strong focus, working memory, impulse control, and executive functioning skills who are ambitious and hardworking are the ones to watch in the future.

Anonymous wrote:Just to dispute previous comments, I have a gifted kid in 4th grade (136 WISC plus every teacher except Kinder has commented on his abilities) and he gets bored ALL THE TIME.

Anonymous wrote:If the issue is just that the kid is gifted, the child should be able to supplement with personal work. Most likely the child is neurodiverse, and the parent's behavior indicates it might be hereditary.

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Anonymous wrote:I have found that the people who talk the most about how smart their kids actually often don't know whether or not their child truly qualifies as gifted, which is usually defined as an IQ 130 or higher (top 2% of the population). These people sometimes find out that their kid is not in fact gifted and is just smart, and have a hard time dealing with it.

IQ tests are bunk. This is not 1930.

Anonymous wrote:Just to dispute previous comments, I have a gifted kid in 4th grade (136 WISC plus every teacher except Kinder has commented on his abilities) and he gets bored ALL THE TIME.

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Anonymous wrote:A fellow parent is always complaining to me that her child is “gifted” and hence bored at school. We have had literally dozens of conversations about this. So far, I have been polite. Her conversations imply that my child and other children in the grade are too dumb to be in the same class as her kid. She should either take action and have her child skip a grade or enter a talented and gifted program or just shut up. Da Vinci and Einstein and even Bill Gates are/were geniuses but I seriously doubt the giftedness of this child is going to make a difference to the world.

Truly gifted children are not bored - they are in their heads. I took my DD for evaluation for ADHD - she never was attentive in class, didn’t understand the directions on assignments, etc. she always “looked” (to the teachers) like she was paying attention. She wasn’t. She was checking out the birds outside or thinking about swimming. She wasn’t bored! She wasn’t interested, which is different. Anyway, she is truly gifted and has already skipped a grade. To me, this is about stubbornness- we all have to pay attention to and do crap we don’t want to. Heck I don’t want to cook dinner tonight or fold the laundry, but it’s not a function of my giftedness - it’s because I don’t like those things and have to do them anyway. Similarly, my kid needs to pay attention and do the work in class - nothing to do with her giftedness and more to do with her manners. Apparently the mom you refer to also has bad manners

The mom has bad manners and I’m glad your child isn’t bored but it’s simply not true that “gifted people” are never bored! Yes, may escape into daydreaming but plenty get bored sometimes. (And no, I’m not replying because my kid is gifted and bored.)

It’s 100% true that gifted children don’t get bored. Anyone who says they have a gifted child who is “bored” doesn’t have a gifted child. The child might be advanced academically but they aren’t bored. Gifted children can always find something to entertain themselves and don’t need the direction of a teacher.

I have had more than one teacher explain this to me, including those who work with gifted children.

Unfortunately, we mix advanced and gifted children in programs. They actually have different needs. But the typical child in, say, AAP isn’t “gifted.”

Dp. They can get bored. Gifted children are a diverse subset of people.

Nope. I mean, I guess if it makes you feel better to tell yourself that, whatever, soothe yourself with fantasy. But objectively, nope.

No fantasy over here. You make a lot of assumptions. Let's see if you can figure out all of them by yourself.

I just have more life experience. You’re the type who is frequently wrong but rarely in doubt, an affliction that is aggravated by latent anxiety about how your child stacks up against his peers. I know your type very well.

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Anonymous wrote:A fellow parent is always complaining to me that her child is “gifted” and hence bored at school. We have had literally dozens of conversations about this. So far, I have been polite. Her conversations imply that my child and other children in the grade are too dumb to be in the same class as her kid. She should either take action and have her child skip a grade or enter a talented and gifted program or just shut up. Da Vinci and Einstein and even Bill Gates are/were geniuses but I seriously doubt the giftedness of this child is going to make a difference to the world.

Truly gifted children are not bored - they are in their heads. I took my DD for evaluation for ADHD - she never was attentive in class, didn’t understand the directions on assignments, etc. she always “looked” (to the teachers) like she was paying attention. She wasn’t. She was checking out the birds outside or thinking about swimming. She wasn’t bored! She wasn’t interested, which is different. Anyway, she is truly gifted and has already skipped a grade. To me, this is about stubbornness- we all have to pay attention to and do crap we don’t want to. Heck I don’t want to cook dinner tonight or fold the laundry, but it’s not a function of my giftedness - it’s because I don’t like those things and have to do them anyway. Similarly, my kid needs to pay attention and do the work in class - nothing to do with her giftedness and more to do with her manners. Apparently the mom you refer to also has bad manners

The mom has bad manners and I’m glad your child isn’t bored but it’s simply not true that “gifted people” are never bored! Yes, may escape into daydreaming but plenty get bored sometimes. (And no, I’m not replying because my kid is gifted and bored.)

It’s 100% true that gifted children don’t get bored. Anyone who says they have a gifted child who is “bored” doesn’t have a gifted child. The child might be advanced academically but they aren’t bored. Gifted children can always find something to entertain themselves and don’t need the direction of a teacher.

I have had more than one teacher explain this to me, including those who work with gifted children.

Unfortunately, we mix advanced and gifted children in programs. They actually have different needs. But the typical child in, say, AAP isn’t “gifted.”

Dp. They can get bored. Gifted children are a diverse subset of people.

Nope. I mean, I guess if it makes you feel better to tell yourself that, whatever, soothe yourself with fantasy. But objectively, nope.

No fantasy over here. You make a lot of assumptions. Let's see if you can figure out all of them by yourself.

Anonymous wrote:They are no more annoying than the sports parents who are convinced their kid is going pro. Also, as a parent of a 2E kid, gifted isn't all that. Some of them have poor executive functioning skills and struggle academically compared to their high-achieving but less "gifted" peers. The kids with really strong focus, working memory, impulse control, and executive functioning skills who are ambitious and hardworking are the ones to watch in the future.