Anonymous wrote:Late thirties woman looking for a husband. I’m dating a lot of divorced days; mid thirties; make good money; have a kid or two. They all want to settle down and be married and are even open for another kid.

It’s definitely raining men! ☺️

Anonymous wrote:They want someone to take care of their home and kids?

Anonymous wrote:Things still fall into traditional gender roles. Men look to women to meet their domestic needs and women look to men to meet their financial needs.

You will find some women taking on the domestic responsibilities for their new husband and step children and you will find men taking on financial responsibilities for their new wife and step children.

Both are two sides of the same coin. People meet some of their own responsibilities and look to others to meet other needs.

I would guess that the number of women who remain completely financially independent and take on full financial responsibility for themselves and their children is pretty similar to men who remain completley domestically independent and take on full domestic responsibilities for themselves and their children

Anonymous wrote:Things still fall into traditional gender roles. Men look to women to meet their domestic needs and women look to men to meet their financial needs.

You will find some women taking on the domestic responsibilities for their new husband and step children and you will find men taking on financial responsibilities for their new wife and step children.

Both are two sides of the same coin. People meet some of their own responsibilities and look to others to meet other needs.

I would guess that the number of women who remain completely financially independent and take on full financial responsibility for themselves and their children is pretty similar to men who remain completley domestically independent and take on full domestic responsibilities for themselves and their children

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Anonymous wrote:I’m literally being told by the divorced dads: I want a family structure; I want another kid; I have money and can support a family.

Yeah, they do. They also want someone to do the household stuff (best case, split the load). They do not want to be solely responsible for household and kid stuff. Which is fine, I don't either, but the big question is why did they divorce then?

I divorced when my kids were 15 and 13. I dated but didn't marry until one was graduated from university and the other was a junior in college. I ran my household perfectly fine on my own, and I effectively had 90% physical custody as the kids didn't want to live with their mother for a variety of reasons. Men run their households just fine, thank you very much. And the fact that you automatically slandered an entire gender with this trope indicates lazy, archaic thinking and likely more than a touch of bitterness and projection. You're just not in touch with the real world and your misandry is revolting. Be better.

Maybe take heart in the fact that you defy the stereotype, rather than attacking a woman for pointing that out to you. Most men don’t run households, period. It’s great that you do. But acknowledging the infrequency of that is not misandry.

Different poster. It isn't infrequent at all. It is a perpetuating of a stereotype that men do little at home and aren't capable of managing a home. Just repeating it doesn't make it true. Most of what is on this thread is misandry. Studies of men and their reasons for staying or leaving a marriage give far more complex and nuanced responses than the nastiness leveled here.

You are lying. A simple google search will lead you to real facts. Only 7% of US households are ran by single fathers.

What year is that statistic from?

2024, no stats for 2025 yet

In singel parent homes, about 25% are father led now. It climbs every year. Then there are all the joint custody cases where fathers are managing their households and children during their custody time. Now that men are able to get more than every other weekend in some states, it is increasing.

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Anonymous wrote:I’m literally being told by the divorced dads: I want a family structure; I want another kid; I have money and can support a family.

Yeah, they do. They also want someone to do the household stuff (best case, split the load). They do not want to be solely responsible for household and kid stuff. Which is fine, I don't either, but the big question is why did they divorce then?

I divorced when my kids were 15 and 13. I dated but didn't marry until one was graduated from university and the other was a junior in college. I ran my household perfectly fine on my own, and I effectively had 90% physical custody as the kids didn't want to live with their mother for a variety of reasons. Men run their households just fine, thank you very much. And the fact that you automatically slandered an entire gender with this trope indicates lazy, archaic thinking and likely more than a touch of bitterness and projection. You're just not in touch with the real world and your misandry is revolting. Be better.

Maybe take heart in the fact that you defy the stereotype, rather than attacking a woman for pointing that out to you. Most men don’t run households, period. It’s great that you do. But acknowledging the infrequency of that is not misandry.

Different poster. It isn't infrequent at all. It is a perpetuating of a stereotype that men do little at home and aren't capable of managing a home. Just repeating it doesn't make it true. Most of what is on this thread is misandry. Studies of men and their reasons for staying or leaving a marriage give far more complex and nuanced responses than the nastiness leveled here.

You are lying. A simple google search will lead you to real facts. Only 7% of US households are ran by single fathers.

What year is that statistic from?

2024, no stats for 2025 yet

Please link the source. What I can find is from 2011 for 7%

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Anonymous wrote:I’m literally being told by the divorced dads: I want a family structure; I want another kid; I have money and can support a family.

Yeah, they do. They also want someone to do the household stuff (best case, split the load). They do not want to be solely responsible for household and kid stuff. Which is fine, I don't either, but the big question is why did they divorce then?

I divorced when my kids were 15 and 13. I dated but didn't marry until one was graduated from university and the other was a junior in college. I ran my household perfectly fine on my own, and I effectively had 90% physical custody as the kids didn't want to live with their mother for a variety of reasons. Men run their households just fine, thank you very much. And the fact that you automatically slandered an entire gender with this trope indicates lazy, archaic thinking and likely more than a touch of bitterness and projection. You're just not in touch with the real world and your misandry is revolting. Be better.

Maybe take heart in the fact that you defy the stereotype, rather than attacking a woman for pointing that out to you. Most men don’t run households, period. It’s great that you do. But acknowledging the infrequency of that is not misandry.

Different poster. It isn't infrequent at all. It is a perpetuating of a stereotype that men do little at home and aren't capable of managing a home. Just repeating it doesn't make it true. Most of what is on this thread is misandry. Studies of men and their reasons for staying or leaving a marriage give far more complex and nuanced responses than the nastiness leveled here.

You are lying. A simple google search will lead you to real facts. Only 7% of US households are ran by single fathers.

What year is that statistic from?

2024, no stats for 2025 yet

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Anonymous wrote:I’m literally being told by the divorced dads: I want a family structure; I want another kid; I have money and can support a family.

Yeah, they do. They also want someone to do the household stuff (best case, split the load). They do not want to be solely responsible for household and kid stuff. Which is fine, I don't either, but the big question is why did they divorce then?

I divorced when my kids were 15 and 13. I dated but didn't marry until one was graduated from university and the other was a junior in college. I ran my household perfectly fine on my own, and I effectively had 90% physical custody as the kids didn't want to live with their mother for a variety of reasons. Men run their households just fine, thank you very much. And the fact that you automatically slandered an entire gender with this trope indicates lazy, archaic thinking and likely more than a touch of bitterness and projection. You're just not in touch with the real world and your misandry is revolting. Be better.

Maybe take heart in the fact that you defy the stereotype, rather than attacking a woman for pointing that out to you. Most men don’t run households, period. It’s great that you do. But acknowledging the infrequency of that is not misandry.

Different poster. It isn't infrequent at all. It is a perpetuating of a stereotype that men do little at home and aren't capable of managing a home. Just repeating it doesn't make it true. Most of what is on this thread is misandry. Studies of men and their reasons for staying or leaving a marriage give far more complex and nuanced responses than the nastiness leveled here.

You are lying. A simple google search will lead you to real facts. Only 7% of US households are ran by single fathers.

What year is that statistic from?

2024, no stats for 2025 yet

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Anonymous wrote:I’m literally being told by the divorced dads: I want a family structure; I want another kid; I have money and can support a family.

Yeah, they do. They also want someone to do the household stuff (best case, split the load). They do not want to be solely responsible for household and kid stuff. Which is fine, I don't either, but the big question is why did they divorce then?

I divorced when my kids were 15 and 13. I dated but didn't marry until one was graduated from university and the other was a junior in college. I ran my household perfectly fine on my own, and I effectively had 90% physical custody as the kids didn't want to live with their mother for a variety of reasons. Men run their households just fine, thank you very much. And the fact that you automatically slandered an entire gender with this trope indicates lazy, archaic thinking and likely more than a touch of bitterness and projection. You're just not in touch with the real world and your misandry is revolting. Be better.

Maybe take heart in the fact that you defy the stereotype, rather than attacking a woman for pointing that out to you. Most men don’t run households, period. It’s great that you do. But acknowledging the infrequency of that is not misandry.

Different poster. It isn't infrequent at all. It is a perpetuating of a stereotype that men do little at home and aren't capable of managing a home. Just repeating it doesn't make it true. Most of what is on this thread is misandry. Studies of men and their reasons for staying or leaving a marriage give far more complex and nuanced responses than the nastiness leveled here.

You are lying. A simple google search will lead you to real facts. Only 7% of US households are ran by single fathers.

What year is that statistic from?

Anonymous wrote:According to the CDC Stats on Marriage and Divorce, men remarry in 3.3 years and women remarry in 3.1 years.

Anonymous wrote:Being divorced is a tag they want to remove and by remarrying they prove their worthiness and desirability to their social circle and also to their ex.

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Anonymous wrote:A lot of these divorces happened because women got sick of taking care of them. It's exhausting and men weren't picking up their slack. So many of my divorced friends say that now when their kids go to dad's house, it's the first free time they've had since kids were born. Clearly men liked having a built in housekeeper and they want to replicate that.

+ a million

These men don't want to get their lives together on their own, they want a woman to swoop in and do it for them.

I would only marry a divorced guy if he'd been living on his own for at least two years, with a functioning household he'd set up himself. Same standard I'd use for a never-married guy -- I want him to show me that he's capable of figuring out how to keep a house clean, feed himself a healthy diet, maintain his own social life, etc. I do not want a "project" or to rescue some idiot man from himself. If he has kids (and personally I wouldn't marry a man with kids), I'd want to see that he has fatherhood on lock, good relationships, shows up for them, no chaos around scheduling and school and his kids are doing well with friends and activities and normal lives. I'd want to see a good relationship with the ex, too -- functional co-parents who don't bad mouth each other to their kids, make decisions in an equitable and functional way, etc.

If you have a savior complex and get a kick out of a man coming to you looking for you to complete and fix his life, take a moment and imagine that YOU are sick or injured and need someone, not even to take care of you, but just to manage your household and kids on his own without you for a little while. You think this man desperate for a replacement wife ASAP is going to be able to do that?

Anonymous wrote:I would be so disappointed and embarrassed if my single and childless DC was dating a divorced man with kids.

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Anonymous wrote:My XH remarried almost immediately. For him he wanted someone to take care of him because adulting is hard! It’s so much easier when you have a life manager and someone who takes care of everything for you and when you lose that due to divorce you’re eager to replace it. It’s a business relationship.

What's saddest about this is how these men are probably divorced because they took their first wife's labor for granted. Only after they didn't have it were they truly aware of how much she did for them. Now they want to replace that labor, but probably haven't leveled up at all in the gratitude or partnership areas. That's why most women are cautious about relationships with divorced me. Some of them learn, most of them haven't yet.