Anonymous
Post 12/12/2025 23:04     Subject: I hate being responsible for all the cooking in my house
Anonymous wrote:Another helpless husband and martyr wife thread?

I am just like OP. I don’t like to cook; DH does. I eat healthy but otherwise don’t much care what or when; DH likes variety and regular mealtimes or his blood sugar drops. We have elementary age kids. I look forward to not not cooking as much as I do now.

I do most cooking during the week and he does most cooking on the weekends. We meal plan together. The kids are mostly making their own school lunches these days.

How have you gotten yourselves to the point where you do everything?



My DH is a terrible cook. I happily eat whatever dinner he might prepare, but it's usually too little food for our family of 5 or frankly doesn't taste very good. My teen DCs, on the other hand, make amazing meals. There aren't any weekend dinners because the kids have plans.

Once the kids are gone, I anticipate a lot of eating out for the first year. After that we'll get back into the routine of our pre-kid days, which was still me cooking. It's a weird combination where he doesn't care enough to do it, but really appreciates having a meal made for him.
Anonymous
Post 12/12/2025 21:10     Subject: Re:I hate being responsible for all the cooking in my house
Your husband should be contributing to the cooking duties OP - - it should not fall squarely only on your shoulders.
Anonymous
Post 12/11/2025 15:04     Subject: I hate being responsible for all the cooking in my house
Anonymous wrote:Amen, sister. I have turned into an elderly person who wants to eat a modest little plate of something unfussy at 4 p.m. on most days. A handful of nuts, some crackers, some cheese, crudite. Then I realize I've somehow been swindled into feeding a giant man and two starving, fussy pre-teen/teens. DH works in an office with a commute 4 days a week and I WFH. Add kids with activities into the mix and it does fall on me. Also DH says he will eat "whatever" but then in the moment is like "what's this" or "hmmm I've had a too much red meat" yet when cornered and asked what he wants for the week is a huge dumb deer in headlights. I have my own irrelevant solutions but the vent is the important part.



Me too. I told my husband just the other day that when the younger kid goes away to college in 3 years, I'm never cooking again. He looked distressed.
Anonymous
Post 12/11/2025 15:03     Subject: I hate being responsible for all the cooking in my house
Anonymous wrote:I am counting the days until my youngest goes off to college and I can eat cereal over the sink and be done with dinner prep.

DH had basic cooking skills when we first met, but they have completely atrophied, along with all common kitchen sense. I have cheerfully told him that when we are empty nesters, his days of having a different hot meal each evening will be done, but I don't think he believes me. He's going to be in for a rude awakening.


What a pig he is
Anonymous
Post 12/11/2025 14:58     Subject: I hate being responsible for all the cooking in my house
Amen sister
Anonymous
Post 12/11/2025 14:55     Subject: I hate being responsible for all the cooking in my house
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My husband is totally disabled. What in the world is these other husbands’ excuses? Make these dudes cook!


No kidding!! I do that and I seriously don’t get women who marry lame ducks then complain about them. I’m sure these men were the same way before marriage - yet the women expect them to be different. I told my husband that I wanted an equal partnership - we both earn; we both take on child rearing and home duties


Some couples split 50/50 everything and some do 100% of tasks they are best at. It doesn’t mean it never gets annoying or repetitive to do these things.


And it doesn't mean both parties like all of what they do. My husband is 100% responsible for the trash. He likes nothing about that task but it doesn't matter, it has to be done.
Anonymous
Post 12/11/2025 14:53     Subject: Re:I hate being responsible for all the cooking in my house
My kids and DH like to do the grocery and cooking. Their cleaning skills is not that great. As a result, there is a lot of wastage, chaos, disorganization in my house. But, hey! I am not cooking at all.

- SAHM
Anonymous
Post 12/11/2025 14:46     Subject: I hate being responsible for all the cooking in my house
Anonymous wrote:When my kids are grown I don't think I will ever cook ever again. I hate it. I also don't really care about food. I will sometimes remember at 3pm that I haven't eaten yet for the day other than a cup of coffee. I like good food when I am eating it but I don't ever THINK about food all day. My husband is the opposite. He constantly is thinking about what is for lunch and dinner. Its so annoying. Then I have young kids who I am solely responsible for making sure they are fed healthy meals every day. I am over it. Rant over.


As someone who constantly thinks about food, it's more annoying for me than it is for you.

In any event, if he is the one who cares, then he is the one who can cook.
Anonymous
Post 12/11/2025 14:24     Subject: I hate being responsible for all the cooking in my house
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My husband is totally disabled. What in the world is these other husbands’ excuses? Make these dudes cook!


No kidding!! I do that and I seriously don’t get women who marry lame ducks then complain about them. I’m sure these men were the same way before marriage - yet the women expect them to be different. I told my husband that I wanted an equal partnership - we both earn; we both take on child rearing and home duties


Some couples split 50/50 everything and some do 100% of tasks they are best at. It doesn’t mean it never gets annoying or repetitive to do these things.
Anonymous
Post 12/11/2025 14:22     Subject: I hate being responsible for all the cooking in my house
Anonymous wrote:My husband is totally disabled. What in the world is these other husbands’ excuses? Make these dudes cook!


No kidding!! I do that and I seriously don’t get women who marry lame ducks then complain about them. I’m sure these men were the same way before marriage - yet the women expect them to be different. I told my husband that I wanted an equal partnership - we both earn; we both take on child rearing and home duties
Anonymous
Post 12/11/2025 14:22     Subject: I hate being responsible for all the cooking in my house
Another helpless husband and martyr wife thread?

I am just like OP. I don’t like to cook; DH does. I eat healthy but otherwise don’t much care what or when; DH likes variety and regular mealtimes or his blood sugar drops. We have elementary age kids. I look forward to not not cooking as much as I do now.

I do most cooking during the week and he does most cooking on the weekends. We meal plan together. The kids are mostly making their own school lunches these days.

How have you gotten yourselves to the point where you do everything?

Anonymous
Post 12/11/2025 14:13     Subject: I hate being responsible for all the cooking in my house
Anonymous wrote:Amen, sister. I have turned into an elderly person who wants to eat a modest little plate of something unfussy at 4 p.m. on most days. A handful of nuts, some crackers, some cheese, crudite. Then I realize I've somehow been swindled into feeding a giant man and two starving, fussy pre-teen/teens. DH works in an office with a commute 4 days a week and I WFH. Add kids with activities into the mix and it does fall on me. Also DH says he will eat "whatever" but then in the moment is like "what's this" or "hmmm I've had a too much red meat" yet when cornered and asked what he wants for the week is a huge dumb deer in headlights. I have my own irrelevant solutions but the vent is the important part.



Any complaints in my house get met with ‘thank you for volunteering to cook tomorrow’. When tomorrow rolls around and there’s no food for the kids I say, ‘it’s dad’s night to cook, so suppose you could make yourself and a frozen burrito’ followed by ‘take it up with dad, why is it my responsibility?’. I work too and have just as much of the financial burden as DH, so I expect 50% from him on tasks like these.
Anonymous
Post 12/11/2025 12:16     Subject: I hate being responsible for all the cooking in my house
Anonymous wrote:Amen, sister. I have turned into an elderly person who wants to eat a modest little plate of something unfussy at 4 p.m. on most days. A handful of nuts, some crackers, some cheese, crudite. Then I realize I've somehow been swindled into feeding a giant man and two starving, fussy pre-teen/teens. DH works in an office with a commute 4 days a week and I WFH. Add kids with activities into the mix and it does fall on me. Also DH says he will eat "whatever" but then in the moment is like "what's this" or "hmmm I've had a too much red meat" yet when cornered and asked what he wants for the week is a huge dumb deer in headlights. I have my own irrelevant solutions but the vent is the important part.


I felt every word of this and laughed out loud at the bolded.
Anonymous
Post 12/11/2025 12:04     Subject: I hate being responsible for all the cooking in my house
My husband is totally disabled. What in the world is these other husbands’ excuses? Make these dudes cook!
Anonymous
Post 12/11/2025 12:00     Subject: I hate being responsible for all the cooking in my house
I am counting the days until my youngest goes off to college and I can eat cereal over the sink and be done with dinner prep.

DH had basic cooking skills when we first met, but they have completely atrophied, along with all common kitchen sense. I have cheerfully told him that when we are empty nesters, his days of having a different hot meal each evening will be done, but I don't think he believes me. He's going to be in for a rude awakening.