Anonymous
11/28/2025 11:44
Subject: When getting to know someone do you ask them if they own a house or not?
I’d find that off putting in an initial conversation. Like OP, I’d wonder what was behind the question. There are also so many scenarios and variables that the simplest y/n answer doesn’t shed much light.
Anonymous
11/28/2025 11:19
Subject: When getting to know someone do you ask them if they own a house or not?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:They are trying to gauge your finances. There are a lot of men and women in the dating pool that are floundering in very large debt.
I've had the dates follow me out to the parking lot to get a look at the car I am driving (again...trying to gauge your finances.)
A woman I dated for a couple months gauged my finances. I had an apartment in DC, and not a cheap one, that I rented with the intention of staying in during the week. She wanted to "talk" where she stated that she couldn't be in a relationship with someone my age ( 34 at the time) who did own a condo or home. What she didn't know was that I had a $6 million beach house, a 2.5 million dollar house I owned that I let my parents use rent free, and a $1.5 million condo on the Med in Nice. I looked at her in disbelief, smiled and laughed out loud, said thanks got up, dropped $50 on the table for our drinks and walked out of cafe without saying another word.
This is a great first stab at a short story! Maybe join a fiction workshop so you can flesh it out and get notes from other writers.
Anonymous
11/28/2025 11:18
Subject: When getting to know someone do you ask them if they own a house or not?
Anonymous wrote:People who don't own a house by 30 are probably not financially intelligent and a big red flag.
This is the majority of people—average age at homeownership is now 40. Doesn’t say anything about their intelligence.
Anonymous
11/28/2025 10:42
Subject: When getting to know someone do you ask them if they own a house or not?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:They are trying to gauge your finances. There are a lot of men and women in the dating pool that are floundering in very large debt.
I've had the dates follow me out to the parking lot to get a look at the car I am driving (again...trying to gauge your finances.)
A woman I dated for a couple months gauged my finances. I had an apartment in DC, and not a cheap one, that I rented with the intention of staying in during the week. She wanted to "talk" where she stated that she couldn't be in a relationship with someone my age ( 34 at the time) who did own a condo or home. What she didn't know was that I had a $6 million beach house, a 2.5 million dollar house I owned that I let my parents use rent free, and a $1.5 million condo on the Med in Nice. I looked at her in disbelief, smiled and laughed out loud, said thanks got up, dropped $50 on the table for our drinks and walked out of cafe without saying another word.
You are definitely lying. And if not, you are terrible with finances.
Not lying and how by what metric does this make me terrible with finances?
1. Allow your parents freeload off you instead of making use of the $2.5m locked in the house . Parents should have a trust set up for them making payments but not live in a multi million estate free 2. $1.5m condo in Nice is either BS orca very stupid decision. I dated an actual billionaire. He did an extensive research on buying RE in France and Italy and decided against. It’s a tax trap - they can really get you by the balls for taxes. Also condos don’t appreciate as well as SF. Again, money wasted.
Sighed $7m NW woman
Anonymous
11/28/2025 10:25
Subject: When getting to know someone do you ask them if they own a house or not?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:They are trying to gauge your finances. There are a lot of men and women in the dating pool that are floundering in very large debt.
I've had the dates follow me out to the parking lot to get a look at the car I am driving (again...trying to gauge your finances.)
A woman I dated for a couple months gauged my finances. I had an apartment in DC, and not a cheap one, that I rented with the intention of staying in during the week. She wanted to "talk" where she stated that she couldn't be in a relationship with someone my age ( 34 at the time) who did own a condo or home. What she didn't know was that I had a $6 million beach house, a 2.5 million dollar house I owned that I let my parents use rent free, and a $1.5 million condo on the Med in Nice. I looked at her in disbelief, smiled and laughed out loud, said thanks got up, dropped $50 on the table for our drinks and walked out of cafe without saying another word.
You are definitely lying. And if not, you are terrible with finances.
Not lying and how by what metric does this make me terrible with finances?
Anonymous
11/28/2025 09:03
Subject: When getting to know someone do you ask them if they own a house or not?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:People who don't own a house by 30 are probably not financially intelligent and a big red flag.
Or they served in the military and had to move every couple years.
Or they have had obstacles you didn’t and didn’t have advantages you did.
Or they learned finance and know that all assets return at about the same rate and decided they were better off dumping extra cash into S&P every month.
Anonymous
11/28/2025 09:01
Subject: Re:When getting to know someone do you ask them if they own a house or not?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Yes OP I was asked that and also if I had a US citizenship (on video intrusive). Immediate unmatch . The men themselves had beaten up apartments in the background. I own 50+ rentals
In this area they probably are asking because of their clearance. You don’t sound very knowledgeable.
It was not in dmv and the man never worked for government. It’s because of my accent. So primitive and stupid to think a woman only would date you for a green card. He shouldn’t be dating any foreign born women with this attitude