Anonymous wrote:Also, OP, I think you may have ADHD. Like another poster said, you might do better with external/extrinsic motivation. For example, if someone was depending on you, you would probably do the thing. For whatever reason, you may not do the thing when you are the one relying on yourself.
If the above is true, don't feel bad. I have done the same thing. ADHD meds have helped me with it, but I sometimes still struggle.
There is literally no indication of ADHD but sure, taking uppers might give OP some motivation.
The role of behavior in perpetuating anxiety is well known and addressed in therapy. The role of behavior is depression is less wildly knows but “behavioral activation” is also a therepeutic target for depression. It is the lesser practiced “B” in CBT.
Here is a workbook you could order:
https://www.amazon.com/Overcoming-Depression-One-Step-Time/dp/1572243678
I also recommend you seek out a CBT/ACT therapist and be very honest with them about your behaviors.