Anonymous wrote:[img]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would never agree to wonder around town with a total stranger that I have zero information about. I'm in my 40s and have a high paying career, my time is very limited and valuable. I pre-screen men over the phone or on a video call before I go out with anyone.

Try to have video intros and phone calls prior to meeting in RL.

What's wrong with them wanting to know your career and degree before they start going out with you? I don't want to waste my time on someone without any aspirations and boring

You sound fun. And I think I know why you’re not married!

You missed - I was married for almost 20 years to one of the wealthiest men on the East Coast. Date similar post divorce. Good luck to you building something remotely close .

Queen.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:[img]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would never agree to wonder around town with a total stranger that I have zero information about. I'm in my 40s and have a high paying career, my time is very limited and valuable. I pre-screen men over the phone or on a video call before I go out with anyone.

Try to have video intros and phone calls prior to meeting in RL.

What's wrong with them wanting to know your career and degree before they start going out with you? I don't want to waste my time on someone without any aspirations and boring

You sound fun. And I think I know why you’re not married!

You missed - I was married for almost 20 years to one of the wealthiest men on the East Coast. Date similar post divorce. Good luck to you building something remotely close .

Building what exactly? That the most interesting thing about it are the men you've spread your legs for?

Thank you. For this comment

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here

I am not only interested in women who are in their mid 20s. I will date a 28 or 29 year old. I am just looking for help/advice on how to have better dates and connect with people. I know DC tends to be career oriented, but my dating experience here seems indistinguishable from a holiday work party that everyone is forced to attend. I was hoping people could give me some advice. I am not going to start screening my potential dates with a video call/zoom meeting.

Are you allergic to women your own age? Why must they be 20-somethings?

This.

OP, what are you even talking to these women about on the app? You don't/won't screen them, so what are you even saying to them when you match?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would never agree to wonder around town with a total stranger that I have zero information about. I'm in my 40s and have a high paying career, my time is very limited and valuable. I pre-screen men over the phone or on a video call before I go out with anyone.

Try to have video intros and phone calls prior to meeting in RL.

What's wrong with them wanting to know your career and degree before they start going out with you? I don't want to waste my time on someone without any aspirations and boring

Not OP. That is a great idea! No longer single, but when I was I didn't want to waste my time on someone who wasn't aligned on on the basics.

A lot of men on video interviews just not my specs. Very young kids, just divided and marriage negative (say they dumped a prior GF because she wanted kids/marriage) , have kids out of wedlock, not employed, live far away, out of share, don’t own a car, never travel etc. No need to meet.
Very few people meet basics - eg are like me - home and car owners, employed, like to travel, in shape, seek life partners etc.

Anonymous wrote:OP here

I am not only interested in women who are in their mid 20s. I will date a 28 or 29 year old. I am just looking for help/advice on how to have better dates and connect with people. I know DC tends to be career oriented, but my dating experience here seems indistinguishable from a holiday work party that everyone is forced to attend. I was hoping people could give me some advice. I am not going to start screening my potential dates with a video call/zoom meeting.

"I am not only interested in women who are mid 20s. I will also accept mid to late 20s."

Sounds like OP is dating out of his budget.

You invited someone on a first date to... walk? Low effort much?

Hey OP, are you usually a good conversationalist bit for some reason dates are like interviews? Or is it hard for you to have fun conversations in general?

Do you ask your dates stuff like what they do for fun, their favorite restaurant, whether they have siblings, what they are currently watching, their favorite hobbies, something they have always wanted to try, etc?

The old saying “if you’re bored then you’re boring” rings true.

Anonymous wrote:I would never agree to wonder around town with a total stranger that I have zero information about. I'm in my 40s and have a high paying career, my time is very limited and valuable. I pre-screen men over the phone or on a video call before I go out with anyone.

Try to have video intros and phone calls prior to meeting in RL.

What's wrong with them wanting to know your career and degree before they start going out with you? I don't want to waste my time on someone without any aspirations and boring

Not OP. That is a great idea! No longer single, but when I was I didn't want to waste my time on someone who wasn't aligned on on the basics.

Anonymous wrote:[img]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would never agree to wonder around town with a total stranger that I have zero information about. I'm in my 40s and have a high paying career, my time is very limited and valuable. I pre-screen men over the phone or on a video call before I go out with anyone.

Try to have video intros and phone calls prior to meeting in RL.

What's wrong with them wanting to know your career and degree before they start going out with you? I don't want to waste my time on someone without any aspirations and boring

You sound fun. And I think I know why you’re not married!

You missed - I was married for almost 20 years to one of the wealthiest men on the East Coast. Date similar post divorce. Good luck to you building something remotely close .

Gag me.

You avoid the interview problem by getting all the interview questions out of the way before the date.

If you're looking for a LTR, there is no point in meeting someone without pre-screening them. It's perfectly acceptable to have some basic criteria for the person you might spend the rest of your life with. It would be weird if you didn't have this. You should ascertain whether the person meets your minimum specs (and whether you meet hers) BEFORE you meet in person.

Pick up the phone and have a conversation. IF that goes well, then ask her out on a date. YOU need to plan the date. The purpose of in-person date is to determine whether you have a spark with the woman. Choose a public spot where you can easily linger if things are going great. Make sure the place isn't so loud that you cannot hear one another. Give her your full name in advance so that she can Google away and confirm that you're who you say you are. 90% of the "interview" questions you're getting would probably be answered with a 20-minute online search. Let her get all of that out of the way BEFORE the date. If she still wants to go out with you after vetting you, you will have a much more relaxing and enjoyable time socializing together.

Pro tip: YOU need to gather info on her and demonstrate that you actually read her profile and like what she shared about herself. Are you asking follow up questions about her stated interest in baby goat yoga? Do you share her interest in one day hiking the Appalachian Trail? Where you also an English Lit major? Being curious about who she is as a person is how you have an interesting date.

Anonymous wrote:[img]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would never agree to wonder around town with a total stranger that I have zero information about. I'm in my 40s and have a high paying career, my time is very limited and valuable. I pre-screen men over the phone or on a video call before I go out with anyone.

Try to have video intros and phone calls prior to meeting in RL.

What's wrong with them wanting to know your career and degree before they start going out with you? I don't want to waste my time on someone without any aspirations and boring

You sound fun. And I think I know why you’re not married!

You missed - I was married for almost 20 years to one of the wealthiest men on the East Coast. Date similar post divorce. Good luck to you building something remotely close .

Building what exactly? That the most interesting thing about it are the men you've spread your legs for?

OP sounds like a bad date. If the dates he plans are boring and he refuses to screen women ahead of time and he has education requirements and then refuses to discuss education it seems like it's an easy point to who's fault it is.

Then again, for a divorced math nerd who only wants women a decade younger, it does seem right on track.

OP’s dating range should be 25-35 but for some reason he shots for 25-29. Then he complains that women treat him in a transactional way

Anonymous wrote:OP here

I am not only interested in women who are in their mid 20s. I will date a 28 or 29 year old. I am just looking for help/advice on how to have better dates and connect with people. I know DC tends to be career oriented, but my dating experience here seems indistinguishable from a holiday work party that everyone is forced to attend. I was hoping people could give me some advice. I am not going to start screening my potential dates with a video call/zoom meeting.

Are you allergic to women your own age? Why must they be 20-somethings?