DD leaves this weekend, has done nothing. I’m not doing it. I figure if she has enough socks, underwear, and toothpaste, it’ll all work out.

I think it is different with girls. All 4 girls in our friend circle who were going to college had color coded, matched, lists and pintrest boards.

Anonymous wrote:Honestly I think it’s a good sign if your kid doesn’t pack. I had all my stuff packed for college 4 weeks before I needed to leave. Home was not a good place and I could not wait to get out of there. I assume that any kid who’s slow to pack has a safe and comfortable home life and parents who they know care about them and will be there for them.

Somehow my Instagram algorithm got infected by moms dropping kids at college and ALL of the kids were doing fun stuff with friends instead of packing up until the last minute. One kid got move in day wrong by a full day (late) and multiple kids went to Lollapalooza the night before. Everyone’s in the same boat.

My DD is only 10, so yes, I know this post will come back to haunt me one day when I’m packing at 1 am the night before.

But you're right on all points.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DC is due at college on Wednesday. We leave 9am that morning. So far no progress towards packing. Room is a disaster, to-do and to-buy lists are a mile long. DC just keeps scheduling one million good-bye social things, exercising twice a day, etc. It's all avoidant behavior but this is driving me insane. I swear that I am not pulling an all-nighter tomorrow night. They'll go to college with the clothes on their back if it comes to it. Anyone relate?

Sounds like the poster from last year whose kid wouldn’t write essays so parent did it instead.

I can’t imagine this scenario. If my kid didn’t follow through on reasonable requests to pack, I wouldn’t allow her to go out with friends. My kid is 18, but we control the purse strings and are clear with expectations. It’s a matter of mutual respect.

That is generally what we do but do you really want to enforce rules of that sort one week before your child goes off to college?

OP - Thanks for starting this thread. I thought my child was the only one who did not pack until the last minute.

Anonymous wrote:My DC is due at college on Wednesday. We leave 9am that morning. So far no progress towards packing. Room is a disaster, to-do and to-buy lists are a mile long. DC just keeps scheduling one million good-bye social things, exercising twice a day, etc. It's all avoidant behavior but this is driving me insane. I swear that I am not pulling an all-nighter tomorrow night. They'll go to college with the clothes on their back if it comes to it. Anyone relate?

Sounds like the poster from last year whose kid wouldn’t write essays so parent did it instead.

I can’t imagine this scenario. If my kid didn’t follow through on reasonable requests to pack, I wouldn’t allow her to go out with friends. My kid is 18, but we control the purse strings and are clear with expectations. It’s a matter of mutual respect.

DC2, a planner, was 95% packed a week before departure.

DC1 procrastinated. It helped motivate him when I explained what we were willing to do/not do. In particular, it was helpful to explain that before move in date, we’d be happy to provide or pay for necessities (e.g., sheets, towels etc) but once at school, these items will be paid for out of your own budget. Kids knew we didn’t have extra money for last-minute purchases.

Anonymous wrote:My kid is not packing at all. He said he will just buy clothes when he gets there…..left tonight with just his backpack…..oh well…

That must be a huge backpack.

Anonymous wrote:My kid is not packing at all. He said he will just buy clothes when he gets there…..left tonight with just his backpack…..oh well…

The type of kid that would actually follow through with that will probably be just fine.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have you helped them approach what and how to do this, OP? Or have you just said “pack for college” and let them figure it out? Because unless your kid is coming from boarding school, this is a very new thing and many kids get overwhelmed and don’t know how to start, so they avoid it. You have to help them.

This is absurd.

If your kid can not pack themselves they should not be going to college

Funny.

No.

Anonymous wrote:I helped. They did their clothes. I did all dorm essentials. I wanted ease in unloading, etc. so I got those big blue bags and a Rubbermaid and it went so easy. But- yes it’s a bit of apprehension, goodbyes, huge transition that’s why I took it easy.

This year- sophomore study abroad fall semester and he was packed a week early all by himself. A lot easier with airplane limits, just taking clothes.

This is basically what we did. My wife and I bought the dorm stuff and the blue bags. Most of the stuff we bought on Amazon or Target. We started this about a month before he left. He started packing his clothes the day before we left. It all worked out.

Anonymous wrote:Have you helped them approach what and how to do this, OP? Or have you just said “pack for college” and let them figure it out? Because unless your kid is coming from boarding school, this is a very new thing and many kids get overwhelmed and don’t know how to start, so they avoid it. You have to help them.

This is absurd.

If your kid can not pack themselves they should not be going to college

Anonymous wrote:I helped. They did their clothes. I did all dorm essentials. I wanted ease in unloading, etc. so I got those big blue bags and a Rubbermaid and it went so easy. But- yes it’s a bit of apprehension, goodbyes, huge transition that’s why I took it easy.

This year- sophomore study abroad fall semester and he was packed a week early all by himself. A lot easier with airplane limits, just taking clothes.

Oh and helping that first year was therapy for me, the one last act. I channeled all of my angst and emotion into researching and buying dorm essentials endlessly—then I wasn’t facing the elephant in the room… his leaving.

I helped. They did their clothes. I did all dorm essentials. I wanted ease in unloading, etc. so I got those big blue bags and a Rubbermaid and it went so easy. But- yes it’s a bit of apprehension, goodbyes, huge transition that’s why I took it easy.

This year- sophomore study abroad fall semester and he was packed a week early all by himself. A lot easier with airplane limits, just taking clothes.

I helped my son with non-clothes stuff the first year, and made him handle clothes and shoes and other personal stuff. This year, I made him pack everything. I told him to let me know if anything needed to be purchased or replaced, but otherwise I didn’t get involved. He forgot to bring a pillow and seems to have lost his mattress pad from last year and I didn’t know to get him a new one. Oh well. He’ll find his way to Target or whatever.

Honestly I think it’s a good sign if your kid doesn’t pack. I had all my stuff packed for college 4 weeks before I needed to leave. Home was not a good place and I could not wait to get out of there. I assume that any kid who’s slow to pack has a safe and comfortable home life and parents who they know care about them and will be there for them.

Somehow my Instagram algorithm got infected by moms dropping kids at college and ALL of the kids were doing fun stuff with friends instead of packing up until the last minute. One kid got move in day wrong by a full day (late) and multiple kids went to Lollapalooza the night before. Everyone’s in the same boat.

My DD is only 10, so yes, I know this post will come back to haunt me one day when I’m packing at 1 am the night before.