graduating on time from a good college

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our son ... didn't get accepted into the flagship ... because he didn't have the right classes due to bad advisement.

I graduated in three years because I read the requirements obsessively and met with advisors. I see students trying to apply or transfer and then getting disappointed because they overlooked criteria. State universities are bureaucratic and process tens of thousands of applications. If you are going to survive in a large organization then you need to be self-motivated and check all the boxes. You didn't even mention the SAT score, which makes me suspicious that it was bad, or that he did not take it.

Other countries have 3-year or 5-year college degrees. Many students take a gap year to travel. Many students are on the 5-year plan, often because of an internship, a junior year abroad, or majors like CS and engineering with extensive requirements. Then some go to graduate school. Business school is 2-years and law school is 3-years. Medical careers and Ph.D.'s take longer. Indeed, many Ph.D. students in their late 20's realized they are not going to be superstars and quit to make money. But graduating college at age 21 versus 22 is nothing.

You son is immature and short-sighted. Indeed, many teenagers think all colleges are the same, and an "A" from a community college confers that same knowledge and standing as an "A" from a Harvard or MIT honors course. If here merely wants a degree, he could enroll in an online program.

Based on the history, I'm concerned your family might be delusional about the prospects for future transfer. Hopefully admission officers would reward community college students who sacrificed and demonstrated maturity by taking an extra year. But it would be bad to wait an extra year for nothing.

There’s no doubt that an A at Harvard or MIT opens more doors for you than an A at a CC. The way I’ve always thought of it is:

It’s better to go to a more prestigious college, but going to a more prestigious college doesn’t make you better.

Anonymous wrote:If the son doesn't have the maturity and skills to figure out what classes he needs to take to transfer schools and instead blames it on bad advising (particularly since "many" of his CC peer are able to transfer), it's unlikely he'll do well in a large flagship that does not do a lot of handholding.

Regardless of his decision, he's an adult and should start making his own decisions AND taking accountability for them.

You have it backwards. The faculty at top universities want to see their students to succeed much more than the faculty at a no-name university. Top colleges are also likely to have a smaller student-to-faculty ratio. One of the reasons people work so hard to get into top colleges is because of these kinds of benefits.

Anonymous wrote:If the son doesn't have the maturity and skills to figure out what classes he needs to take to transfer schools and instead blames it on bad advising (particularly since "many" of his CC peer are able to transfer), it's unlikely he'll do well in a large flagship that does not do a lot of handholding.

Regardless of his decision, he's an adult and should start making his own decisions AND taking accountability for them.

Agree with this one. If you are planning to do an auto-transfer, it is imperative that you map out your classes and get the grades required in each class. I would sit down with my kid before they registered for their first classes and have them do a two year plan! Then I would double and triple check their plan for them. It isn’t hard to find this information.

Anonymous wrote:Colleges don't reject great students who merely "don't have the right classes." They accept them and tell them to take the extra classes.

In Virginia's public CC to public university guaranteed transfer scheme, the CC student who wants to transfer to VT or UVa or whichever absolutely WILL be rejected if they do not take all of the required CC courses, maintain the required CC GPA, or do any of the other rigid bureaucratic steps that are required.

OP's story is totally credible to those of us who know about Virginia's CC to public university transfer scheme.

Go away, obnoxious and sexist PP. No one said "genius", and yes, colleges, shockingly do have basic requirements for admissions.

This thread has some great advice and skepticism.

There is something fishy here. I have seen too many stories lately of boy-geniuses who get inexplicably rejected because they didn't take three classes, or they didn't take the SAT, or whatever. Then they continue to deny reality and keep reapplying unsuccessfully instead of addressing the real issue.

Colleges don't reject great students who merely "don't have the right classes." They accept them and tell them to take the extra classes.

This does not need to delay graduation by a full year. Your son might take some part-time classes this year (as a special student) and future overloads to graduate in 4.5 years.

If the son doesn't have the maturity and skills to figure out what classes he needs to take to transfer schools and instead blames it on bad advising (particularly since "many" of his CC peer are able to transfer), it's unlikely he'll do well in a large flagship that does not do a lot of handholding.

Regardless of his decision, he's an adult and should start making his own decisions AND taking accountability for them.

Anonymous wrote:Missing three classes is a lot of classes from two years.

I get it's "due to bad advisement" but this is 2025 and I'm sure it's clearly on the site. Also, he should have been communicating with the target "better school" about what would be needed to transfer.

This is a big part about taking the often smart option of doing the CC route. It's only smart if you stay on the path, and the same kids who weren't on the right path to get into the "better" college out of HS are still struggling with these executive functions issues in CC.

It's his life and his decision. I think the feeling bad part about graduation a year later is pretty immature tbh. You hear it sometimes with seniors in HS who dont want to take a gap year. But two years later, I think he should know life happens.

But it is what it is. This is his decision. I'd be holding him accountable for missing three classes, that's on him. But I'd let him make his own decision about college now.

Agree with this. Your son needs an extra year at community college anyhow to gain some maturity.

Missing three classes is a lot of classes from two years.

I get it's "due to bad advisement" but this is 2025 and I'm sure it's clearly on the site. Also, he should have been communicating with the target "better school" about what would be needed to transfer.

This is a big part about taking the often smart option of doing the CC route. It's only smart if you stay on the path, and the same kids who weren't on the right path to get into the "better" college out of HS are still struggling with these executive functions issues in CC.

It's his life and his decision. I think the feeling bad part about graduation a year later is pretty immature tbh. You hear it sometimes with seniors in HS who dont want to take a gap year. But two years later, I think he should know life happens.

But it is what it is. This is his decision. I'd be holding him accountable for missing three classes, that's on him. But I'd let him make his own decision about college now.

Don't impose the decision to waste one year of his life chasing prestige. He is 20, not 12.

Anonymous wrote:I think he should wait and transfer to the flagship. Plenty of people take 4.5 or 5 years to graduate. Some of his friends will to. Regardless, he needs to get over that.

What's your financial situation? Could you afford to send him abroad for a semester for the gap semester?

Agree. LOTS of kids, including many friends he meets in college or former friends from high school take 5 yrs to graduate. It is no big deal, at all. People change majors, take a gap year, have to work more hours and take fewer classes, etc. He needs to stop being insecure. He shouldn’t care about the timeline of high school friends and make the decisions that will be best for him longterm.

Anonymous wrote:This is your kid's way of telling you he REALLY wants to go to one of the colleges he got into. Please listen to him.

He's scrambling for reasons to persuade because Mom isn't listening and it pushing him to try for prestige that he knows he can't live up to.

“Graduations are really important to him.” This is a stupid reason to make the choice he is making. But he is an adult and he has told you what he wants to do. Support him. Part of becoming and adult and maturing is making decisions that don’t make a lot of sense.

Anonymous wrote:Our son ... didn't get accepted into the flagship ... because he didn't have the right classes due to bad advisement.

I graduated in three years because I read the requirements obsessively and met with advisors. I see students trying to apply or transfer and then getting disappointed because they overlooked criteria. State universities are bureaucratic and process tens of thousands of applications. If you are going to survive in a large organization then you need to be self-motivated and check all the boxes. You didn't even mention the SAT score, which makes me suspicious that it was bad, or that he did not take it.

Other countries have 3-year or 5-year college degrees. Many students take a gap year to travel. Many students are on the 5-year plan, often because of an internship, a junior year abroad, or majors like CS and engineering with extensive requirements. Then some go to graduate school. Business school is 2-years and law school is 3-years. Medical careers and Ph.D.'s take longer. Indeed, many Ph.D. students in their late 20's realized they are not going to be superstars and quit to make money. But graduating college at age 21 versus 22 is nothing.

You son is immature and short-sighted. Indeed, many teenagers think all colleges are the same, and an "A" from a community college confers that same knowledge and standing as an "A" from a Harvard or MIT honors course. If here merely wants a degree, he could enroll in an online program.

Based on the history, I'm concerned your family might be delusional about the prospects for future transfer. Hopefully admission officers would reward community college students who sacrificed and demonstrated maturity by taking an extra year. But it would be bad to wait an extra year for nothing.