Anonymous wrote:OP, I'd pass. Sounds like too much of a hassle and what if she changes her mind again?

I will say, $34/hour doesn't seem ridiculous, depending on the hours needed. My niece is a before/after-school nanny and makes guaranteed $30/hour for 22.5 hours a week. This is because of the opportunity costs of holding such a few hours when other families may ask for more hours that aren't split. For date night care, she'll charge between $22-$27, being that the hours at one time are longer and no split schedule. Hope this makes sense.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t know if I’d frame it as her taking advantage of you. I think she was hasty in quitting and now that she has a baby, she realizes that it’s actually really freaking hard to juggle work and a baby! Bless her heart. Welcome to motherhood.

She’s taking a shot here, hoping that you’ll pay extra because of your history together or because you have all this perceived extra money laying around and she feel entitled to it.

She’s definitely reaching. $34/hr is not justifiable. Plus she now has all the additional responsibilities that come with a newborn - appointments, time off for sick days, etc. - that only increase the burden on you when she’s unavailable.

If it were me, I’d pass all together or at a minimum I’d go back to the previously agreed rate. Being off the books is a benefit to her, not you. Sure you don’t have to pay the employer portion of FICA and stuff, but you also won’t be able to claim her on your taxes for the dependent care credit, plus you’re technically breaking the law.

I agree with you about her taking a shot as opposed to trying to take advantage of me.

I’m leaning towards passing.

I broached sick leave/how we will handle sick kids, and she made it clear she can’t be around vomiting/fevers because of the baby. While reasonable concern, my kids get sick and she’s going to feel entitled to being paid when they are sick.

Really this is not the right career for her. She expects fewer hours, above market pay and is limited in being able to care for sick kids. She should find another line of work.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our nanny is returning to work for us after having a baby and staying home for six months.

When she left, she made it pretty clear she was leaving, which I didn’t entirely understand since I would have given her paid leave and guaranteed her job. I would have even entertained her bringing her baby to work. She seemed adamant she was just leaving.m and I accepted it.

She recently let me know she’s available to work in the fall and wants to earn a certain amount a week. There was some confusion over the hours I need and she’s suggesting that we pay her a flat rate, which ends up being $34 an hour off the books. I live in a MCOL city and $34 is well above market for two kids.

Since I didn’t know she was returning to work, I signed both my kids up for FT daycare and aftercare. So I’ll have this expense plus her additional hours.

I am willing to pay what we were paying six months ago - $28.

We do very much value her and my kids love her. She’s been a great nanny outside of the strangeness around leaving.

I hate getting into practically an argument around her pay, and also feel cheap not just forking over the extra $60 a week. But I also feel like she might be taking advantage of me as I’m sure I seem very wealthy to her.

Thoughts?

$34 an hour is a lot, especially if she's bringing the baby. $28 is still very high. I would decline telling her you didn't think that she was planning to work per previous discussion and now kids are in a day care and budget wise, its not going to work for you. Tell her you'd be happy to recommend her and post on facebook to help her find a new family.

The challenge is that I already agreed to having her return. We agreed on a weekly amount that is $28 an hour. I went back to my texts to make sure I wasn’t mistaken.

She then recently followed up asking about the hours/start date, and made it clear that some of the hours would need to be paid outside of the weekly amount. This change results in the hourly rate being $34 an hour.

She said she will accept $28, but she really needs the $34 to make ends meet and pay bills.

Also before she left she was on the books and now she is off the books.

I appreciate the responses because I can now see we need to cut ties. My emotions got involved because she was a wonderful nanny.

Anonymous wrote:^^OP here. Apparently you can come work for me and I’ll pay $34 an hour for 13 hours a week - ha!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t know if I’d frame it as her taking advantage of you. I think she was hasty in quitting and now that she has a baby, she realizes that it’s actually really freaking hard to juggle work and a baby! Bless her heart. Welcome to motherhood.

She’s taking a shot here, hoping that you’ll pay extra because of your history together or because you have all this perceived extra money laying around and she feel entitled to it.

She’s definitely reaching. $34/hr is not justifiable. Plus she now has all the additional responsibilities that come with a newborn - appointments, time off for sick days, etc. - that only increase the burden on you when she’s unavailable.

If it were me, I’d pass all together or at a minimum I’d go back to the previously agreed rate. Being off the books is a benefit to her, not you. Sure you don’t have to pay the employer portion of FICA and stuff, but you also won’t be able to claim her on your taxes for the dependent care credit, plus you’re technically breaking the law.

I agree with you about her taking a shot as opposed to trying to take advantage of me.

I’m leaning towards passing.

I broached sick leave/how we will handle sick kids, and she made it clear she can’t be around vomiting/fevers because of the baby. While reasonable concern, my kids get sick and she’s going to feel entitled to being paid when they are sick.

Really this is not the right career for her. She expects fewer hours, above market pay and is limited in being able to care for sick kids. She should find another line of work.


What 13 hr/wk job pays $34/hr ?

Anonymous wrote:I don’t know if I’d frame it as her taking advantage of you. I think she was hasty in quitting and now that she has a baby, she realizes that it’s actually really freaking hard to juggle work and a baby! Bless her heart. Welcome to motherhood.

She’s taking a shot here, hoping that you’ll pay extra because of your history together or because you have all this perceived extra money laying around and she feel entitled to it.

She’s definitely reaching. $34/hr is not justifiable. Plus she now has all the additional responsibilities that come with a newborn - appointments, time off for sick days, etc. - that only increase the burden on you when she’s unavailable.

If it were me, I’d pass all together or at a minimum I’d go back to the previously agreed rate. Being off the books is a benefit to her, not you. Sure you don’t have to pay the employer portion of FICA and stuff, but you also won’t be able to claim her on your taxes for the dependent care credit, plus you’re technically breaking the law.