Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh and be very careful what you say - please don’t use some of the language others have - that’s toxic, or that food is bad for you. Your kids may repeat that to other kids. What you say to your kids remember can be used to judge others and their families who may not have access to as much healthy food as you do. I like to say to my kids that our goal is to have a mix of foods - does this meal have a good mix? Having a lot of any one food isn’t great for us - if I just lived on broccoli it isn’t great either. Meals with a mix, snacks with a mix, that’s our ideal and we don’t always get there but it’s a way to say it without making it about good bad toxic all this language that demonizes things

Is going to be honest, I don’t give two s’s how my teaching my kid on food affects you. Some food is bad, sorry the truth hurts.

You’ve never been poor and it shows. I was poor as a child and my mom did the best to put healthy foods on the table. But sometimes my “lunch” was literally whatever we had at home and it wasn’t always a well balanced meal. Your child’s snide comment could truly hurt a kid who has NO CONTROL over their food intake when they’re young.

I am fortunate to be able to afford healthy food for my kids and they pack fruits and vegetables and home cooked foods for their lunches AND I also teach them to not judge others lunches. Sometimes one meal is just a snapshot of someone’s whole world, so keep your judgement to yourself. That’s all you have to do. Teach your kids to eat healthy and also to be kind.

The worst thing you can do is focus on this too much. You'll give them a complex. Just encourage eating in moderation and encourage them to be healthy in other ways (i.e., exercising, etc), so that they want to be healthy in all ways.

Anonymous wrote:Oh and be very careful what you say - please don’t use some of the language others have - that’s toxic, or that food is bad for you. Your kids may repeat that to other kids. What you say to your kids remember can be used to judge others and their families who may not have access to as much healthy food as you do. I like to say to my kids that our goal is to have a mix of foods - does this meal have a good mix? Having a lot of any one food isn’t great for us - if I just lived on broccoli it isn’t great either. Meals with a mix, snacks with a mix, that’s our ideal and we don’t always get there but it’s a way to say it without making it about good bad toxic all this language that demonizes things

Is going to be honest, I don’t give two s’s how my teaching my kid on food affects you. Some food is bad, sorry the truth hurts.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When I was growing up, mom almost always did the grocery run solo. She simply did not buy any snack foods or soda from the grocery. Skipped that entire aisle. I had never known about Goldfish crackers until 7th grade when I thought other students were talking about eating tiny fish. She would buy cooked peanuts and mixed nuts and bananas and oranges and apples.

Sometimes, not always, she would buy 100% apple juice or 100% cranberry juice (i.e., not juice cocktail). If we were having a party, she might buy some Tostitos, but that was rare.

So it was "normal" that our after school snacks were sliced carrots, sliced celery, peanuts, and fruit juice. Dinners were not fancy, but mostly home cooked. Summer lunches varied and might include ledt overs, mac&cheese, hot dogs, turkey sandwiches, or similar.

According to DCUM you should have been destined to be an overweight/yo-yo dieter junk food binge eater because your mother “restricted” your access to junk food.

Or have cancer because the "home cooked" dinners were hot dogs and sandwiches made with lunch meat.

Some of it is luck. I have two kids and one will pretty much ignore sugary foods, sweets, and sweetened drinks even if it's widely available and the other will gravitate toward it.

I just teach my kid everything in moderation and it's good to try a variety of things. I've had friends who came from restrictive families who went nuts in college and a friend who got extremely sick from an extremely restrictive diet (she ate nothing but vegetables, we should have noticed but missed it).

So I don't have a blanket no to sweets, I teach they are sometimes foods.

I'm lucky to work from home so I can cook most of the time. I'm trying to also introduce cooking at an age appropriate level.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I personally don’t put sugar in the same category of uktr processed foods. I grew up with my grandmother living with us and she baked almost every day. Fresh cookies, pies, cakes or bread. We were also a big ice cream family. We definitely ate dessert every day and typically twice a day. But we are all healthy eaters as adults. We make our own food and don’t have much taste for processed food.
Lids are growing a lot and every active. They will naturally crave sugar and fat because their body is using it. So long as they are also getting healthy proteins, fruit, veg … I don’t have any problem with also having desserts. But my preference is always home made stuff — both because it’s fresher, not addictive in the same way. And you eat less of it when you have to put your own labor into making it. My teen made home made vanilla pudding the other night and it was so delicious.

I just think that if you’re limiting desserts to just special occasions you will end up with a lid that begs Oreos off their neighbor and binge eats it at school.

Sorry but white table sugar is just as bad as upfs. Read that book salt sugar fat.

That being said homemade baked goods that include sugar are still way way better for you than the store bought version so I basically do what you do as well.

I’m sorry I know what rhe books say about white sugar but I just don’t believe it. My parents and grandparents all loved long healthy lives eating dessert every day. None of us are professional athletes or runway models — but if the goal is to live a long life in which you are active into your 80s and 90s, combining regular desserts with an override healthy diet does not seem problematic to me. It when you start adding the easy to consume processed food that it starts being problematic.

It isn’t the “white sugar” in desserts, it’s everything else. Vast majority of treats, desserts, and snacks consumed are not the wholesome homemade desserts your grandparents had and made. Now it’s the Giant cupcakes, the Costco sheet cakes, muffins, the packaged generic grocery store cookies, ultra processed corn syrup solids filled ice cream, not to mention all the crappy snack foods that are common place now

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I personally don’t put sugar in the same category of uktr processed foods. I grew up with my grandmother living with us and she baked almost every day. Fresh cookies, pies, cakes or bread. We were also a big ice cream family. We definitely ate dessert every day and typically twice a day. But we are all healthy eaters as adults. We make our own food and don’t have much taste for processed food.
Lids are growing a lot and every active. They will naturally crave sugar and fat because their body is using it. So long as they are also getting healthy proteins, fruit, veg … I don’t have any problem with also having desserts. But my preference is always home made stuff — both because it’s fresher, not addictive in the same way. And you eat less of it when you have to put your own labor into making it. My teen made home made vanilla pudding the other night and it was so delicious.

I just think that if you’re limiting desserts to just special occasions you will end up with a lid that begs Oreos off their neighbor and binge eats it at school.

Sorry but white table sugar is just as bad as upfs. Read that book salt sugar fat.

That being said homemade baked goods that include sugar are still way way better for you than the store bought version so I basically do what you do as well.

I’m sorry I know what rhe books say about white sugar but I just don’t believe it. My parents and grandparents all loved long healthy lives eating dessert every day. None of us are professional athletes or runway models — but if the goal is to live a long life in which you are active into your 80s and 90s, combining regular desserts with an override healthy diet does not seem problematic to me. It when you start adding the easy to consume processed food that it starts being problematic.

Believe what you want, but you are wrong.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I personally don’t put sugar in the same category of uktr processed foods. I grew up with my grandmother living with us and she baked almost every day. Fresh cookies, pies, cakes or bread. We were also a big ice cream family. We definitely ate dessert every day and typically twice a day. But we are all healthy eaters as adults. We make our own food and don’t have much taste for processed food.
Lids are growing a lot and every active. They will naturally crave sugar and fat because their body is using it. So long as they are also getting healthy proteins, fruit, veg … I don’t have any problem with also having desserts. But my preference is always home made stuff — both because it’s fresher, not addictive in the same way. And you eat less of it when you have to put your own labor into making it. My teen made home made vanilla pudding the other night and it was so delicious.

I just think that if you’re limiting desserts to just special occasions you will end up with a lid that begs Oreos off their neighbor and binge eats it at school.

Sorry but white table sugar is just as bad as upfs. Read that book salt sugar fat.

That being said homemade baked goods that include sugar are still way way better for you than the store bought version so I basically do what you do as well.

I’m sorry I know what rhe books say about white sugar but I just don’t believe it. My parents and grandparents all loved long healthy lives eating dessert every day. None of us are professional athletes or runway models — but if the goal is to live a long life in which you are active into your 80s and 90s, combining regular desserts with an override healthy diet does not seem problematic to me. It when you start adding the easy to consume processed food that it starts being problematic.

Anonymous wrote:When I was growing up, mom almost always did the grocery run solo. She simply did not buy any snack foods or soda from the grocery. Skipped that entire aisle. I had never known about Goldfish crackers until 7th grade when I thought other students were talking about eating tiny fish. She would buy cooked peanuts and mixed nuts and bananas and oranges and apples.

Sometimes, not always, she would buy 100% apple juice or 100% cranberry juice (i.e., not juice cocktail). If we were having a party, she might buy some Tostitos, but that was rare.

So it was "normal" that our after school snacks were sliced carrots, sliced celery, peanuts, and fruit juice. Dinners were not fancy, but mostly home cooked. Summer lunches varied and might include ledt overs, mac&cheese, hot dogs, turkey sandwiches, or similar.

According to DCUM you should have been destined to be an overweight/yo-yo dieter junk food binge eater because your mother “restricted” your access to junk food.

I was like you. It’s so hard to maintain. My kids are teens now and they eat healthy at home with more processed foods than I would like, but ultimately I want them to eat and we have gotten so much busier. And they eat more junk out and about with friends (go out for boba, etc). I am less stressed out about, which is good. It’s just hard. Do your best and try not to make it a huge fight.

When I was growing up, mom almost always did the grocery run solo. She simply did not buy any snack foods or soda from the grocery. Skipped that entire aisle. I had never known about Goldfish crackers until 7th grade when I thought other students were talking about eating tiny fish. She would buy cooked peanuts and mixed nuts and bananas and oranges and apples.

Sometimes, not always, she would buy 100% apple juice or 100% cranberry juice (i.e., not juice cocktail). If we were having a party, she might buy some Tostitos, but that was rare.

So it was "normal" that our after school snacks were sliced carrots, sliced celery, peanuts, and fruit juice. Dinners were not fancy, but mostly home cooked. Summer lunches varied and might include ledt overs, mac&cheese, hot dogs, turkey sandwiches, or similar.

Oh also know that picky eating has a lot to do with genetics so a good part of that is luck!

Oh and be very careful what you say - please don’t use some of the language others have - that’s toxic, or that food is bad for you. Your kids may repeat that to other kids. What you say to your kids remember can be used to judge others and their families who may not have access to as much healthy food as you do. I like to say to my kids that our goal is to have a mix of foods - does this meal have a good mix? Having a lot of any one food isn’t great for us - if I just lived on broccoli it isn’t great either. Meals with a mix, snacks with a mix, that’s our ideal and we don’t always get there but it’s a way to say it without making it about good bad toxic all this language that demonizes things

Keep doing what you’re doing and as others have said try not to hold too tightly outside the home. As they get older it is honestly everywhere but I still think what you do at home matters and it’s ok to let them just be when out and about with friends, at swim meets, snack after a soccer game, birthday parties. One thing that really helped me was something I read reminding parents to try to remember what their favorite foods were as a child and what their food preferences were and what they are now — it basically reminds you, it’s going to be ok. As a kid you probably preferences a lot of these foods too. Most kids love mac and cheese for example. But most adults don’t prefer to eat mac and cheese for most meals.

Feed a variety of foods at home, feed what you’re eating and generally try not to make separate meals but also be respectful and have things they enjoy available, know that getting nutrition is over the course of the week not at every eating opportunity, that less anxiety about it is usually better and modeling goes a LONG way. You won’t prevent access to these foods without creating other issues (restricting causes bigger issues) so deep breaths and keep doing what you’re doing!