Anonymous
06/04/2025 11:39
Subject: DH having emotional affair
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:We are in early 50's and married 23 years. Things have been very rocky for awhile. This was a huge wake up call and I'm terrified of things ending and frankly at the same time disgusted by it all. Empty nest soon. Any advice on strategy as far as trying to nip in the bud? I feel like trying to forbid makes it more enticing. We are working on the marriage too but haven't openly discussed it all. Have discussed a little. I think we are both unsure what the future holds so trying to see how it all pans out.
A lot of married men are very lonely. If someone talks to them or is nice to them the men respond. It’s like throwing a drowning person rope.
Same with women. Why do we seem incapable of turning toward each other?
Anonymous
06/04/2025 11:28
Subject: DH having emotional affair
Anonymous wrote:We are in early 50's and married 23 years. Things have been very rocky for awhile. This was a huge wake up call and I'm terrified of things ending and frankly at the same time disgusted by it all. Empty nest soon. Any advice on strategy as far as trying to nip in the bud? I feel like trying to forbid makes it more enticing. We are working on the marriage too but haven't openly discussed it all. Have discussed a little. I think we are both unsure what the future holds so trying to see how it all pans out.
A lot of married men are very lonely. If someone talks to them or is nice to them the men respond. It’s like throwing a drowning person rope.
Anonymous
06/04/2025 10:51
Subject: DH having emotional affair
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I am stressed and not sure what to say. We are making strides in connecting now - physically and emotionally yet I'm just beside myself. I don't want to make it so he sneaks around even more. Or make her such a big deal. I find her very overt and very into showing her body on social media. I did comment that I would never want our daughter acting like that and was going to ask him if she has an only fans and suggest that may be perfect for her lol. Bad idea?
Making fun of a new friend and referencing decorum standards is a sign of weakness and will make you seem frumpy and old. Referencing OF is a Mean Girls type comment.
The position of strength is to just ask for the contact to cease because it's making you concerned about your marriage.
What if I say it's making me uncomfortable that this woman is encouraging a break up?
Your husband can turn it around and gaslight you. Don’t trash talk the OW.
He can say that all he wants. I know it's not true and so does he, so I will likely say something along those lines.
But it's true and I know for a fact. How would that get turned around on me?
“She’s just a friend, we’re just talking, why are you so insecure?”
Anonymous
06/04/2025 10:38
Subject: DH having emotional affair
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I am stressed and not sure what to say. We are making strides in connecting now - physically and emotionally yet I'm just beside myself. I don't want to make it so he sneaks around even more. Or make her such a big deal. I find her very overt and very into showing her body on social media. I did comment that I would never want our daughter acting like that and was going to ask him if she has an only fans and suggest that may be perfect for her lol. Bad idea?
Making fun of a new friend and referencing decorum standards is a sign of weakness and will make you seem frumpy and old. Referencing OF is a Mean Girls type comment.
The position of strength is to just ask for the contact to cease because it's making you concerned about your marriage.
What if I say it's making me uncomfortable that this woman is encouraging a break up?
Your husband can turn it around and gaslight you. Don’t trash talk the OW.
But it's true and I know for a fact. How would that get turned around on me?
“She’s just a friend, we’re just talking, why are you so insecure?”
Anonymous
06/04/2025 10:26
Subject: DH having emotional affair
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I am stressed and not sure what to say. We are making strides in connecting now - physically and emotionally yet I'm just beside myself. I don't want to make it so he sneaks around even more. Or make her such a big deal. I find her very overt and very into showing her body on social media. I did comment that I would never want our daughter acting like that and was going to ask him if she has an only fans and suggest that may be perfect for her lol. Bad idea?
Making fun of a new friend and referencing decorum standards is a sign of weakness and will make you seem frumpy and old. Referencing OF is a Mean Girls type comment.
The position of strength is to just ask for the contact to cease because it's making you concerned about your marriage.
What if I say it's making me uncomfortable that this woman is encouraging a break up?
Your husband can turn it around and gaslight you. Don’t trash talk the OW.
But it's true and I know for a fact. How would that get turned around on me?
Anonymous
06/04/2025 10:07
Subject: DH having emotional affair
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I am stressed and not sure what to say. We are making strides in connecting now - physically and emotionally yet I'm just beside myself. I don't want to make it so he sneaks around even more. Or make her such a big deal. I find her very overt and very into showing her body on social media. I did comment that I would never want our daughter acting like that and was going to ask him if she has an only fans and suggest that may be perfect for her lol. Bad idea?
Making fun of a new friend and referencing decorum standards is a sign of weakness and will make you seem frumpy and old. Referencing OF is a Mean Girls type comment.
The position of strength is to just ask for the contact to cease because it's making you concerned about your marriage.
What if I say it's making me uncomfortable that this woman is encouraging a break up?
Your husband can turn it around and gaslight you. Don’t trash talk the OW.
Anonymous
06/04/2025 10:05
Subject: DH having emotional affair
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I am stressed and not sure what to say. We are making strides in connecting now - physically and emotionally yet I'm just beside myself. I don't want to make it so he sneaks around even more. Or make her such a big deal. I find her very overt and very into showing her body on social media. I did comment that I would never want our daughter acting like that and was going to ask him if she has an only fans and suggest that may be perfect for her lol. Bad idea?
Making fun of a new friend and referencing decorum standards is a sign of weakness and will make you seem frumpy and old. Referencing OF is a Mean Girls type comment.
The position of strength is to just ask for the contact to cease because it's making you concerned about your marriage.
What if I say it's making me uncomfortable that this woman is encouraging a break up?
Anonymous
06/04/2025 09:57
Subject: DH having emotional affair
Anonymous wrote:I am stressed and not sure what to say. We are making strides in connecting now - physically and emotionally yet I'm just beside myself. I don't want to make it so he sneaks around even more. Or make her such a big deal. I find her very overt and very into showing her body on social media. I did comment that I would never want our daughter acting like that and was going to ask him if she has an only fans and suggest that may be perfect for her lol. Bad idea?
Making fun of a new friend and referencing decorum standards is a sign of weakness and will make you seem frumpy and old. Referencing OF is a Mean Girls type comment.
The position of strength is to just ask for the contact to cease because it's making you concerned about your marriage.
Anonymous
06/04/2025 09:30
Subject: DH having emotional affair
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I am stressed and not sure what to say. We are making strides in connecting now - physically and emotionally yet I'm just beside myself. I don't want to make it so he sneaks around even more. Or make her such a big deal. I find her very overt and very into showing her body on social media. I did comment that I would never want our daughter acting like that and was going to ask him if she has an only fans and suggest that may be perfect for her lol. Bad idea?
Yeah, imma call troll here.
Why troll? I'm serious
Anonymous
06/04/2025 09:15
Subject: DH having emotional affair
If OP were a man, all of the posts would be about how she’s seeking emotional support elsewhere because she’s not getting it at home. So OP, are you looking at your own potential shortfalls in the relationship?
Anonymous
06/04/2025 09:07
Subject: DH having emotional affair
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I am stressed and not sure what to say. We are making strides in connecting now - physically and emotionally yet I'm just beside myself. I don't want to make it so he sneaks around even more. Or make her such a big deal. I find her very overt and very into showing her body on social media. I did comment that I would never want our daughter acting like that and was going to ask him if she has an only fans and suggest that may be perfect for her lol. Bad idea?
Yeah, imma call troll here.
I don’t know if the OP is real or not, but there seems to an epidemic of men following barely-clothed women on social media. Joke’s often on them but they don’t realize it.
Anonymous
06/04/2025 09:04
Subject: DH having emotional affair
Anonymous wrote:I am stressed and not sure what to say. We are making strides in connecting now - physically and emotionally yet I'm just beside myself. I don't want to make it so he sneaks around even more. Or make her such a big deal. I find her very overt and very into showing her body on social media. I did comment that I would never want our daughter acting like that and was going to ask him if she has an only fans and suggest that may be perfect for her lol. Bad idea?
Yeah, imma call troll here.
Anonymous
06/04/2025 09:00
Subject: DH having emotional affair
Anonymous wrote:OP here. Then I got nervous because he is making an effort and set up a date night and we are doing counseling of sorts and he is talking about trips we have later this year. I wonder if he's buying time so he can figure her out. He just met her a few weeks ago.
How did you find out that they are in contact? Do you have access to his devices? Does he talk about her?
Anonymous
06/04/2025 08:58
Subject: DH having emotional affair
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:OP here. Then I got nervous because he is making an effort and set up a date night and we are doing counseling of sorts and he is talking about trips we have later this year. I wonder if he's buying time so he can figure her out. He just met her a few weeks ago.
why are you going on trips if your finances are shot?
Trip is cheaper than therapy bills and divorce.
Anonymous
06/04/2025 08:42
Subject: DH having emotional affair
Anonymous wrote:OP here. Then I got nervous because he is making an effort and set up a date night and we are doing counseling of sorts and he is talking about trips we have later this year. I wonder if he's buying time so he can figure her out. He just met her a few weeks ago.
why are you going on trips if your finances are shot?