Anonymous wrote:My husband tried to stay with his cheating wife as he knew what she was like and would keep the kids from him. She eventually left for the AP and kept the kids from him.

Anonymous wrote:I did. He cheated while I was pregnant/postpartum.

Honestly the three years or so after that I was so depressed I could barely function. I was a zombie and just did my best to go to work and take care of the kids. There was absolutely no way I had the capacity for a divorce, moving out, etc.

After those 3 years I just stopped caring about marriage entirely. What am I gonna do even if we split? I don’t want another man. I don’t want to get married ever again. So I stayed together because it’s just easier with the kids.

But now I basically live my own life. I don’t care if he cheats again. I put myself first, and once the kids are out of the house, I plan to have a silent divorce where I just go do whatever I want.

We still have a relationship. We still have sex, go on dates, have fun, and try to set an example for the kids. I don’t think he’s cheated ever again, he freaked out after he saw how depressed I was and did a ton of therapy.

I don’t know if that makes sense. It’s almost like, if we had divorced, I would have had boyfriends for fun and companionship, but they would have never been a top priority. Since that’s what I would have done, I just did that with my H instead. We have fun, but there’s not a lot of emotion on my end and I don’t prioritize him.

I also flirt a LOT with other men. I know people will say two wrong don’t make a right, but it actually does help me a lot.

Anonymous wrote:Any person who would remain married to a person who has lied + betrayed them (basically what is the overall foundation of cheating) is someone who clearly does not recognize their worth as a person.

Those that stay w/cheaters obviously have terrible self-esteem issues and need professional help.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Any person who would remain married to a person who has lied + betrayed them (basically what is the overall foundation of cheating) is someone who clearly does not recognize their worth as a person.

Those that stay w/cheaters obviously have terrible self-esteem issues and need professional help.

Meh, no dog in this fight, but this is so dramatic and it’s two sides of the same coin. if you were cheated on, and you are simply not able to function or recover that you had to blow up your life and marriage, you need just as much professional help, and suffer from really low self-esteem.

My whole self-worth is not tied up in the fact that my husband may wanna have sex with another woman. Just so weird that that would blow up my life. I don’t get this mentality at all. That said I don’t think people should stay with serial cheaters. But I can accept that people make mistakes and want to move on.

I do agree, though if you have been cheated on, you should get professional help whether you stay or leave. Hasn’t happened to me, but I know enough friends and family it is happened to that I realize how destabilizing it can be.

Ehhh soo true.
But but but .. I don't want to blow up my family bc my husband is a lying cheater that will more than likely re-cheat.




You are very man's dream wife lmao. He will at least get one pass he has sex with another woman while married to you. That's so awesome because you are still going to stick around.

Anonymous wrote:Nope. I’m worth more. You cheat on me and pack your bag. My kids are young adults, no reason to be miserable at this point.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Absolutely love how men are like, men wouldn’t stand for this we would leave! And others are like yes, women stay because they have low self-esteem!

And yet in this country men murder their intimate partners every single day. Most common cause of death for a pregnant woman in this country, that her baby daddy murders her. But yes, women are irrational and can’t handle these things.

Never change morons of the relationship forum of DCUM! Never change.

How many men in your family have murdered their partners? You are correct men are far more likely to kill women. But you speak in a way as if that's what we ought to expect from men. So let me ask you again, how many men in your family have murdered women?

It’s incredibly , incredibly common. Again, I’ll repeat, in this country a pregnant woman’s biggest risk is her intimate partner let that sink in and then ask me again your silly question to try to deflect.

I am just simply pointing out the misogyny of saying women have a low self-esteem when it’s men who are constantly flying off the handle and going into rages. And yes, it is quite common. And murder is not always the end game, but abuse, beating, all very, very, very common.

So basically you are saying, because a man hasn’t committed murder, he can’t be emotionally unstable or insecure? That’s the bar?

Anonymous wrote:Why do you give your DH a second chance? There was a recently a video which went viral about a firefighter who exposed his charging wife during his 40th birthday celebration. He recently filed for divorce. I would have done the same and many men I know would have done the same as well.

But why do women sometimes desperately try to keep a cheating spouse? If my wife cheats she is gone. We will share custody and be civil about it. We will sell our homes and buy new ones. We will continue savings for college etc. I just don't understand why do women feel the need to fight for a cheater.

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn’t miss 50% of my kid’s childhood unless I had no choice.

Anonymous wrote:Any person who would remain married to a person who has lied + betrayed them (basically what is the overall foundation of cheating) is someone who clearly does not recognize their worth as a person.

Those that stay w/cheaters obviously have terrible self-esteem issues and need professional help.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most women have terribly low self esteem and a high need to fit in socially which means having a husband for so many woman having a man is paramount doesn't matter how he treats her.

If you lived as a divorced single parent for a bit or as a single woman after age 35 you would know that society treats these women far differently and worse than any married woman.

There is definitely a stigma for divorced single women especially at schools. Other moms don’t trust them or include them.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Absolutely love how men are like, men wouldn’t stand for this we would leave! And others are like yes, women stay because they have low self-esteem!

And yet in this country men murder their intimate partners every single day. Most common cause of death for a pregnant woman in this country, that her baby daddy murders her. But yes, women are irrational and can’t handle these things.

Never change morons of the relationship forum of DCUM! Never change.

How many men in your family have murdered their partners? You are correct men are far more likely to kill women. But you speak in a way as if that's what we ought to expect from men. So let me ask you again, how many men in your family have murdered women?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Any person who would remain married to a person who has lied + betrayed them (basically what is the overall foundation of cheating) is someone who clearly does not recognize their worth as a person.

Those that stay w/cheaters obviously have terrible self-esteem issues and need professional help.

Meh, no dog in this fight, but this is so dramatic and it’s two sides of the same coin. if you were cheated on, and you are simply not able to function or recover that you had to blow up your life and marriage, you need just as much professional help, and suffer from really low self-esteem.

My whole self-worth is not tied up in the fact that my husband may wanna have sex with another woman. Just so weird that that would blow up my life. I don’t get this mentality at all. That said I don’t think people should stay with serial cheaters. But I can accept that people make mistakes and want to move on.

I do agree, though if you have been cheated on, you should get professional help whether you stay or leave. Hasn’t happened to me, but I know enough friends and family it is happened to that I realize how destabilizing it can be.