For us, my husband had a few job offers in various areas.

We had 2 elem age kids at the time and chose this area, because we could live here long term. If my husband lost his executive “high salary” job, there was a good chance he could find another without us having to move. I was also able to find a good job in my field. The public schools and options for private schools. (even though we say the public school are like private schools here, because you have to have a high HHI to afford the a house zoned for them). And even the debatably lower rated schools are leaps ahead of the ones where we left. Also we’re in VA so the bang for your buck and number of college options can’t be beat.


We had the same initial thought about the area - congested, seemingly run-down compared the country club looking area we left, and relatively very expensive. (We literally doubled our housing budget to get something reasonably comparable to what we had and what I thought at the time I’d be comfortable in).

I absolutelylove the diversity - Not just black, white, and other. Families look different but are so similar otherwise. To me, this is the biggest appeal of this area!

We felt exactly the same way. Housing was double for a lot less house. In fact, I kept convincing myself that we would only be here for a short time. I just thought it was horribly ugly and full of strip malls. But here we are 35 years later enjoying a very nice home in a nice neighborhood. Our child went to very good schools and had every opportunity. We found the silver linings. My husband and I were always fully employed, even through a couple of job changes. We always had a job to go to. This would not have been the case where we lived before (we moved here for his job, but it turned out that the possibilities for me were much better as well). I grew a lot here in my profession.


We do have great access to the airports for travel and good medical facilities. We have access to every kind of food imaginable either through grocery stores or restaurants. Have you walked around the parks like Huntley Meadows or Greenspring or Meadowlark? Have you gone bike riding on the C&O canal path?

This area and especially nova (given lower income tax compared to MD/DC) is probably the best area in the country at being “good enough” across the largest amount of QOL categories - schools, weather, housing affordability (way better than NYC or CA), good salaries, tons of jobs, tons of infrastructure for families like parks, youth programs, access to major airports, etc.

Does not mean this area is “the best” in all of those categories (in fact I’d argue it’s not in any) but collectively it checks the most “yeah, this will work” boxes compared to anywhere else.

For us, my husband had a few job offers in various areas.

We had 2 elem age kids at the time and chose this area, because we could live here long term. If my husband lost his executive “high salary” job, there was a good chance he could find another without us having to move. I was also able to find a good job in my field. The public schools and options for private schools. (even though we say the public school are like private schools here, because you have to have a high HHI to afford the a house zoned for them). And even the debatably lower rated schools are leaps ahead of the ones where we left. Also we’re in VA so the bang for your buck and number of college options can’t be beat.


We had the same initial thought about the area - congested, seemingly run-down compared the country club looking area we left, and relatively very expensive. (We literally doubled our housing budget to get something reasonably comparable to what we had and what I thought at the time I’d be comfortable in).

I absolutelylove the diversity - Not just black, white, and other. Families look different but are so similar otherwise. To me, this is the biggest appeal of this area!

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I am originally from the Minneapolis area - Eden Prairie for those familiar. I also have lived in the San Diego area. I guess I just expected this area to be more Eden Prairie like.

I didn’t get to choose the area where I am living right now. My company offered me the choice of 5 different apartment complexes, all in Fairfax.

I’m enjoying my time here, don’t get me wrong - I especially like the winters compared to mn. I just wouldn’t buy a house here.

I'm not trying to knock Eden Prairie here but it's like 90% white and also a lot of malls? I don't personally love Fairfax but it's also a series of malls and strip mall just less white?

Honestly it mostly sounds like you hate the apartment complex you live in (fair) and really haven't explored at all beyond that. That's like hating the Minneapolis area because you got bored in a suburb ignoring all the culture and things that make Minneapolis great.

Well, your first mistake is living in Fairfax…

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I am originally from the Minneapolis area - Eden Prairie for those familiar. I also have lived in the San Diego area. I guess I just expected this area to be more Eden Prairie like.

I didn’t get to choose the area where I am living right now. My company offered me the choice of 5 different apartment complexes, all in Fairfax.

I’m enjoying my time here, don’t get me wrong - I especially like the winters compared to mn. I just wouldn’t buy a house here.

Sounds like you’d be happier somewhere out in Loudoun County, which would be the equivalent. But you wouldn’t expect the entire Twin Cities area to be like Eden Prairie, so why have that expectation here? I’ve been to other suburbs around Minneapolis; Brooklyn Park isn’t so nice.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I've brought up many of your points on this board and people refuse to believe there are nicer places -- better weather, less traffic, not as dense and rundown, and not as expensive. I really think people don't travel enough within the U.S. I am OK with this area mostly because I like my job but if I lose the job or decide to do something else, I'll definitely be looking to move.

I don't agree with this. Lots of people agree. But most US cities aren't better than this. I can think of a lot of resort towns I'd rather be living in, with there being something to do. But as far as major metro areas are concerned, most are pretty much the same song outside of Manhattan.

Better cities: Boston, Chicago, Pittsburgh, San Francisco, Seattle. Also, Portland (both Maine and Oregon), Columbus.

Exactly three of these don't have worse traffic. They all have worse transit options. Almost all of them have worse weather. Two are even more expensive and significantly so.

I grew up in Chicago and like Pittsburgh more than I thought. But you're driving everywhere in Pittsburgh and if you think DC has crime and public schools that left a lot to be desired I'd introduce you to Chicago, a place I love but that is not short of issues either. I love the Bay Area too but hahahahaha living there without making obscene cash.

"Worse" weather is a subjective thing. I will take Boston/Portland/Chicago/Columbus winters over DC summers a million times over.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I've brought up many of your points on this board and people refuse to believe there are nicer places -- better weather, less traffic, not as dense and rundown, and not as expensive. I really think people don't travel enough within the U.S. I am OK with this area mostly because I like my job but if I lose the job or decide to do something else, I'll definitely be looking to move.

People on this board are from all over the country and have chosen to live here. I could not wait to get out of flyover country myself. I have traveled extensively throughout the US and have lived in a couple of different states. I love SoCal weather, but we tried it for a year, and I am just not a west coast girl.

People from flyover country and Appalachia have chosen to live here in much larger numbers than those from large cities.

OP here. I am originally from the Minneapolis area - Eden Prairie for those familiar. I also have lived in the San Diego area. I guess I just expected this area to be more Eden Prairie like.

I didn’t get to choose the area where I am living right now. My company offered me the choice of 5 different apartment complexes, all in Fairfax.

I’m enjoying my time here, don’t get me wrong - I especially like the winters compared to mn. I just wouldn’t buy a house here.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I've brought up many of your points on this board and people refuse to believe there are nicer places -- better weather, less traffic, not as dense and rundown, and not as expensive. I really think people don't travel enough within the U.S. I am OK with this area mostly because I like my job but if I lose the job or decide to do something else, I'll definitely be looking to move.

I don't agree with this. Lots of people agree. But most US cities aren't better than this. I can think of a lot of resort towns I'd rather be living in, with there being something to do. But as far as major metro areas are concerned, most are pretty much the same song outside of Manhattan.

Better cities: Boston, Chicago, Pittsburgh, San Francisco, Seattle. Also, Portland (both Maine and Oregon), Columbus.

Agree with this list, though Boston, Chicago, and Columbus are tough in winter. Would also add San Diego and Denver. I know less about Research Triangle and Austin, but they may be possibilities.

I lived in SF and Seattle, and the only advantage is the beautiful scenery of a different type and great seafood and Asian food. Nothing else really. Weather in DC is better overall across 4 seasons. I hated SF fog, and cold summers and rarely useful beach . Seattle has glorious summers but terrible everything else. Not a fan of drizzle and fog. Traffic is horrible in both too and pubic transit is worse than DC IMHO. Suburbia there isn’t much better at all. I get it when people used to quaint old towns in the NE complain about DC suburbia. But people from the West Coast? B**ch, please You don’t move West for quaint architecture and old world charm Denver and Austin? You gotta be kidding. The only redeeming feature of Denver is mountain range view at the distance, the city itself is rather blah and flat. Never been to Austin and had no desire to looking at the photos and hearing about the weather. Isn’t it like 5 months of the weather everyone here freaks out about during 2 months of DC summer?

Don't understand Austin at all. Want bad state politics? Miserable summers? Fine but not exactly amazing schools? To drive literally everywhere? All so you can either pay an arm and a leg and live in a condo near 6th or drive to every good meal? There are some holly areas with good views but none are better than the similar areas in DC.

Denver as a city architecturally is brutal.

SF is beautiful. Seattle is beautiful. The suburbs also have a ton of strip malls and if you're in Fairfax you're getting pretty good Asian diaspora food.

American and Canadian suburban infrastructure is just bad and it often bleeds into the cities. I don't think DC is perfect but I do think people think they should hate it and never explore to confirm their and other's views that it's just a souless bureaucratic hub.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I've brought up many of your points on this board and people refuse to believe there are nicer places -- better weather, less traffic, not as dense and rundown, and not as expensive. I really think people don't travel enough within the U.S. I am OK with this area mostly because I like my job but if I lose the job or decide to do something else, I'll definitely be looking to move.

I don't agree with this. Lots of people agree. But most US cities aren't better than this. I can think of a lot of resort towns I'd rather be living in, with there being something to do. But as far as major metro areas are concerned, most are pretty much the same song outside of Manhattan.

Better cities: Boston, Chicago, Pittsburgh, San Francisco, Seattle. Also, Portland (both Maine and Oregon), Columbus.

Exactly three of these don't have worse traffic. They all have worse transit options. Almost all of them have worse weather. Two are even more expensive and significantly so.

I grew up in Chicago and like Pittsburgh more than I thought. But you're driving everywhere in Pittsburgh and if you think DC has crime and public schools that left a lot to be desired I'd introduce you to Chicago, a place I love but that is not short of issues either. I love the Bay Area too but hahahahaha living there without making obscene cash.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I've brought up many of your points on this board and people refuse to believe there are nicer places -- better weather, less traffic, not as dense and rundown, and not as expensive. I really think people don't travel enough within the U.S. I am OK with this area mostly because I like my job but if I lose the job or decide to do something else, I'll definitely be looking to move.

You would have a much stronger argument if you actually listed those places. You just listed a bunch of superlatives and said : they exist. Where?

I’m guessing Research Triangle, Boise, Colorado towns, and Madison.

3 are really far from ocean and all get pretty intense winters.

RT is a contender but you have state politics in NC which are dicey.

I refuse to believe people actually go to Madison except for a few weeks in the summer/fall or drunk during college and believe they want to live in Madison year round.

I have lived in this area since coming here for law school in the 90s, and my husband has been here since his dad worked at the Pentagon in the 80s. I agree with OP - it’s basically only the jobs, and that is changing with federal government cuts. Roads are ugly and embedded with weeds, even the expensive housing stock is run down in many areas, and the schools (while good in terms of test scores) are overcrowded and cutthroat and don’t work for a lot of kids. The museums are great but, truly, how often do people really go? But we are stuck here through kids’ graduation and retirement, if I can hang on through the RIFs and restructuring. No idea where we want to retire, but not here.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I've brought up many of your points on this board and people refuse to believe there are nicer places -- better weather, less traffic, not as dense and rundown, and not as expensive. I really think people don't travel enough within the U.S. I am OK with this area mostly because I like my job but if I lose the job or decide to do something else, I'll definitely be looking to move.

I don't agree with this. Lots of people agree. But most US cities aren't better than this. I can think of a lot of resort towns I'd rather be living in, with there being something to do. But as far as major metro areas are concerned, most are pretty much the same song outside of Manhattan.

Better cities: Boston, Chicago, Pittsburgh, San Francisco, Seattle. Also, Portland (both Maine and Oregon), Columbus.

I love Boston but it is grimy as F and has two seasons, Winter and Humid.

Chicago is a real city, I’ll give you that, but it’s a hard city to live with brutal winters.

Pittsburgh? I mean I like it, but that’s extremely much.

San Francisco is a beautiful place to visit but misery to live unless CRAZY wealthy.

Huge fan of Seattle and Portland Or, but unfortunately I’m not a vampire so not seeing the sun for months is a huge drag. Also Portland, drugs, schools, it’s very niche.

Portland ME is a big town, with beaches too cold to swim in and endless winter. But living on a lake would be nice.

Columbus?? Sure. Honestly this may be your best suggestion. For livability it is DC middle of the road status that make it pretty workable. I think Columbus is similar midatlantic style. But further from the ocean.

CBUS? NO. Better and prettier towns in Ohio. I’d take Cincinnati or Cleveland (which has lakefront and beaches and a decent skyline)

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There are gorgeous parks and playgrounds all over the place. There are amazing activities and events for families and kids. The museums, events, and shopping are so easy to get to. The shows, concerts, and games are an easy drive and so many venues to choose from. The roads have grassy islands with actual flowers planted in them! There’s so much growth and construction going on. Op, check out the Rust Belt, then come back.

We were back recently visiting a friend and had an extra hour to kill so we tried to go to one of these “gorgeous” parks. There were so many people there wasn’t a parking space! OP’s point about density really hits for me. We relocated to the Midwest and we have lots of parks, and a reasonable number of people go to them any given day. In fact I live next to a park and often it’s just me and my dog walking there. Lovely!

Also while we are far from the ocean, we are 40 minutes from Lake Michigan which has waves and isn’t salty.

I like Chicago, but not sure I could do winters (they need to be short for me with breaks of warm weather in between freezing weather). If I were a snowbird with FL residence too, this would be great. Also, not sure how warm Lake Michigan gets and if I would be able to swim there. I need min 70F water temp and likely warmer. But the city has a legit beautiful waterfront and I’d say it’s as much of a coastal city as any ocean front ones.