Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Unless you are going to maintain the lie by becoming parishioners at a church and regularly attending mass and, probably, tithing, getting your kid baptized in a Catholic Church will not provide much boost. If you mark Catholic in the application, most schools will then ask you which parish you belong to. And in some cases (especially for k-8, maybe for diocesan HS) they will contact the parish to see if you are an active member.

Would you be considered an active member even if you only attend mass a couple times a year and make donations without actually tithing?

I have no idea what a parish would say if asked. Maybe confirm that you are on their books as a parishioner but not very active.

It depends on the schools, but I think you'd be considered Catholic but it would be a stretch to say you are an "active member of the Parish." Active means you attend weekly (or at least what, 2-3x/month?), and give regularly with your time and/or money.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I really don’t understand the concept. What is it that makes someone want to be at a Catholic school so badly they are willing to go to a lot of hassle to pretend to be Catholic but not actually convert to Catholicism?

Cheaper tuition and often lower admissions standards as compared to comparable nondenominational schools.

So they're just trying to get out of the public school? Because there are some of these parents at my kids' school and they are always complaining about too much time at mass, certain teachings, basically everything that makes the school a Catholic school. They want a non-religious private school but don't want to pay that kind of money. It is obnoxious and the principal seems to coddle these parents.

Yes, it is obnoxious. And while those who take this route think they are “flying under the radar”, we aren’t stupid.

We know why you’re at the school and “Catholicism” has nothing to do with it. So don’t expect that everyone is glad to see you.

But, I guess the tuition savings alone are enough for you.

I know the Catholic schools do this for the money. But as soon as these people show up they start lobbying and complaining. It degrades the experience for the Catholic families that want a Catholic school.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I really don’t understand the concept. What is it that makes someone want to be at a Catholic school so badly they are willing to go to a lot of hassle to pretend to be Catholic but not actually convert to Catholicism?

Cheaper tuition and often lower admissions standards as compared to comparable nondenominational schools.

So they're just trying to get out of the public school? Because there are some of these parents at my kids' school and they are always complaining about too much time at mass, certain teachings, basically everything that makes the school a Catholic school. They want a non-religious private school but don't want to pay that kind of money. It is obnoxious and the principal seems to coddle these parents.

Our k-8 had some of those and I don’t know why they were handled with kid gloves by the administration, but they were.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I really don’t understand the concept. What is it that makes someone want to be at a Catholic school so badly they are willing to go to a lot of hassle to pretend to be Catholic but not actually convert to Catholicism?

Cheaper tuition and often lower admissions standards as compared to comparable nondenominational schools.

So they're just trying to get out of the public school? Because there are some of these parents at my kids' school and they are always complaining about too much time at mass, certain teachings, basically everything that makes the school a Catholic school. They want a non-religious private school but don't want to pay that kind of money. It is obnoxious and the principal seems to coddle these parents.

Anonymous wrote:I really don’t understand the concept. What is it that makes someone want to be at a Catholic school so badly they are willing to go to a lot of hassle to pretend to be Catholic but not actually convert to Catholicism?

Some Catholic schools are elite or very competitive.

Some Catholic schools provide families with a lot of social capital in certain circles.

Some Catholic schools have excellent teams for specific sports.

Some people are in a fancy neighborhood that’s in a bad public/urban school district, so they go to a k-8 and then a Catholic HS rather than move to a better district.

I live outside the DMV. The largest co-ed private, Catholic HS has the best soccer teams in the state and is seen as a way to access the inner circles of certain groups in our city. The other private HSs are mediocre or single-sex, so rich parents and soccer parents who want their kid to go to a co-ed private will do anything to get them in.

Where I used to live, people would try to game the system to get boys into a specific HS for wrestling. In another city, lacrosse. And so on.

Anonymous wrote:I really don’t understand the concept. What is it that makes someone want to be at a Catholic school so badly they are willing to go to a lot of hassle to pretend to be Catholic but not actually convert to Catholicism?

Cheaper tuition and often lower admissions standards as compared to comparable nondenominational schools.

I really don’t understand the concept. What is it that makes someone want to be at a Catholic school so badly they are willing to go to a lot of hassle to pretend to be Catholic but not actually convert to Catholicism?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Unless you are going to maintain the lie by becoming parishioners at a church and regularly attending mass and, probably, tithing, getting your kid baptized in a Catholic Church will not provide much boost. If you mark Catholic in the application, most schools will then ask you which parish you belong to. And in some cases (especially for k-8, maybe for diocesan HS) they will contact the parish to see if you are an active member.

Would you be considered an active member even if you only attend mass a couple times a year and make donations without actually tithing?

I have no idea what a parish would say if asked. Maybe confirm that you are on their books as a parishioner but not very active.

No in our parish. To maintain in-parish tuition status, our parish basically does spot checks a few times per year and randomly sends kids home on a Friday with a form for the priest to sign at weekend mass.

And re: the convert-for-admissions thing: what I see is that the family is gung-ho for the year before applications and the year of applications, and then they disappear. I think that is part of building up active parishioner status.

At one point we regularly attended mass at a nearby parish because the schedule suited us better, but we did “double envelopes” and gave envelopes to both parishes so we could maintain active status at our regular parish. A lot of people do this to stay on parish rolls as their lives evolve- my grandparents had dual registrations and did double envelopes for years because they wanted to have their funeral mass at their childhood parish.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am one of the PPs. Follow up question on this : Do Episcopalian Schools such as NCS/STA, SSSAS, St Andrews... give any advantage in the admissions process to Episcopalian kids/ families? or is this limited to Catholic Schools?

No. There’s a place in the application to indicate your religion if you choose to, but there’s no advantage to being Episcopalian.

I wonder why this is the case. As in why do Catholic Schools give advantage to Catholic kids in admissions but Episcopalian Schools don't give the same advantage to Episcopalian kids.

Catholic schools that are also parochial get donations from the associated parish to run the school. The parish community therefore provides financial support to the school to the benefit of children of the parish. For diocesan high schools, parishes also send money to the diocesan high school again and support of Catholic education for their parishioners. Because the parish supports the students in this way, they do not have to pay full tuition as would other non-parish, and non-catholic students.
There is no tuition reduction for private, Catholic schools. Everyone pays the full tuition.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Unless you are going to maintain the lie by becoming parishioners at a church and regularly attending mass and, probably, tithing, getting your kid baptized in a Catholic Church will not provide much boost. If you mark Catholic in the application, most schools will then ask you which parish you belong to. And in some cases (especially for k-8, maybe for diocesan HS) they will contact the parish to see if you are an active member.

Would you be considered an active member even if you only attend mass a couple times a year and make donations without actually tithing?

I have no idea what a parish would say if asked. Maybe confirm that you are on their books as a parishioner but not very active.

Anonymous wrote:Unless you are going to maintain the lie by becoming parishioners at a church and regularly attending mass and, probably, tithing, getting your kid baptized in a Catholic Church will not provide much boost. If you mark Catholic in the application, most schools will then ask you which parish you belong to. And in some cases (especially for k-8, maybe for diocesan HS) they will contact the parish to see if you are an active member.

Would you be considered an active member even if you only attend mass a couple times a year and make donations without actually tithing?

Unless you are going to maintain the lie by becoming parishioners at a church and regularly attending mass and, probably, tithing, getting your kid baptized in a Catholic Church will not provide much boost. If you mark Catholic in the application, most schools will then ask you which parish you belong to. And in some cases (especially for k-8, maybe for diocesan HS) they will contact the parish to see if you are an active member.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don’t say they’re Catholic if you’re applying to a Catholic school because you’ll be caught flat-footed when they ask for baptismal or first communion papers.

It’s too late for a 7th grader, but I know a similar family whose kids decided to do baptism and first communion in 6th grade to prep for competitive Catholic HS admissions. Based on who I saw at Easter vigil this week, they aren’t the only ones to have this idea.

What a disgusting mockery of religious conviction.

Absolutely.

I don't know if the rest of the world is like this, but the DC area seems to be filled with people who will do anything to get what they want.

It's appalling.

Seems pretty innocuous to me. In the grand scheme of what parents do to prep their kids for admissions, showing up to a church one morning and having their 12 year old get splashed with some holy water so they can say he’d been baptized is tame.

You’re missing the point. It’s not a disgusting thing to do because it’s a form of “prep[ping] their kids for admissions;” it’s a disgusting thing to do because while the priest splashes their kids with some holy water, the parents are explicitly asked if they are willing and able to raise their children in the faith and if they understand the commitment they’re undertaking. They are called upon to declare their intent to raise their child in the Church. If they only want to increase their children’s chances of being accepted into competitive Catholic schools for the sake of academics, and they don’t intend to raise their children in the Church, the whole baptism is a sham and the children being baptized are forced to participate in the public charade and be complicit in their parents’ lying.

^all this is from my perspective of having attended one Episcopalian school and being the parent of a child at another Episcopalian school, and having been raised Episcopalian (baptism, confirmation, etc) but being functionally agnostic as an adult.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am one of the PPs. Follow up question on this : Do Episcopalian Schools such as NCS/STA, SSSAS, St Andrews... give any advantage in the admissions process to Episcopalian kids/ families? or is this limited to Catholic Schools?

No. There’s a place in the application to indicate your religion if you choose to, but there’s no advantage to being Episcopalian.

I wonder why this is the case. As in why do Catholic Schools give advantage to Catholic kids in admissions but Episcopalian Schools don't give the same advantage to Episcopalian kids.

Because part of the mission of Catholic schools is to teach Catholic students. The entire educational experience is through a Catholic lens, and religion is a core class every semester. That’s not true for Episcopal schools, which have as part of their mission to care for students as children of God, but are not specifically there to teach Episcopalians. Episcopal schools have a religion requirement, but usually only a couple of classes plus ethics, not a class every semester. They may have a weekly chapel service but it tends to be fairly non-denominational vs a weekly Catholic Mass.