Anonymous wrote:I used to send my au pair with them for routine things (like dentist appt) and they'd call me at the end of the appointment with instructions or to get permission for whatever they needed permission for.

To do this, you may need to include a note giving the doc permission to treat in your absence. Best to call the front desk to ask in advance. (Same if you want the kid to go on their own. I did this once my kid could drive-- for routine things like dental cleanings.)

I used to send my au pair with them for routine things (like dentist appt) and they'd call me at the end of the appointment with instructions or to get permission for whatever they needed permission for.

Anonymous wrote:Try to schedule as many appointments as possible on one day and you take off work for the day and that will be MUCH less disruptive to your job.

This. Why would you be taking so many days off to take them to one-off appointments? Do it on an off-day for school and take one day sick leave for you. You have to plan ahead because other parents are doing the same thing. If recurrent appts (like therapy or physical therapy) the nanny takes them.

Anonymous wrote:Your supervisor was inappropriate. I also have kids, and we all have doctor, dentist, eye doc appointments, and some also have dermatologist, gynecologist, etc. So that’s like 5 appointments per person over the year. And then sick visits. So maybe 2-4 more, depending on kids’ ages. It easily adds up but guess what? That’s normal. I would frankly just say, I was in an appointment that I took time off for. That’s it. If you have the leave, use it. There are going to be people who don’t believe you should have any sort of life outside of work. You have to set boundaries with them.

+1

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Really complained or just made a comment? Maybe you should take a sick day or pto on occasion to knock out multiple appointments in one day.

I live in an area where you take doctor's appointments when you can get them. Most people have long wait lists if they accept insurance (or even if they don't). So that's not realistic. Also, it's not like I have 2 appointments per week or so. It's once every 2 weeks I guess, I didn't count them. Maybe less.

Why do you have appointments every two weeks?

I have two kids. They each have a well visit at the pediatrician once a year, dentist appointments twice a year that they go to without me, one has a psychiatrist every three months. Then the random urgent care appointment for strep, maybe twice a year.

Is it that hard to imagine that the kids , of the mom/dad, have medical conditions that you may not know about? Jfc. It’s her leave. She’s entitled to use it as she wishes.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a teen I rode my bike and went to dermatologist, dentist and orthodontist on my own.

same, and pt when I had it.

NP. How on earth did this work? Minors can’t sign the paperwork. I doubt my kids’ doctors would even see then if they showed to unaccompanied, for liability reasons, if nothing else.

There's no paperwork for every visit to the dentist or orthodontist

They can go to the dentist for a cleaning without Mommy

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a teen I rode my bike and went to dermatologist, dentist and orthodontist on my own.

We once sent our teen alone to the orthodontist and they called to let us know that wasn’t allowed. I don’t think a parent ever accompanied me to the ortho when I had braces.

I agree - this is a ridiculous suggestion.

+1.

A lot of people on this board have fully grown kids. They love to give advice about what they did in 2001 and are surprised it may not be totally relevant now.

This is not ridiculous. My DC gets allergy shots and we see teens come in all the time on their own. Same with the orthodontist. I get wanting to go if you can, but not going isn’t neglect. It’s actually probably helpful for them to do some of this routine stuff on their own so that when they’re on their own and have to go to the ER or something, it’s not their first time navigating a medical appointment.

What would your boss say if you had a child with a disability or a chronic health issue?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Really complained or just made a comment? Maybe you should take a sick day or pto on occasion to knock out multiple appointments in one day.

I live in an area where you take doctor's appointments when you can get them. Most people have long wait lists if they accept insurance (or even if they don't). So that's not realistic. Also, it's not like I have 2 appointments per week or so. It's once every 2 weeks I guess, I didn't count them. Maybe less.

Why do you have appointments every two weeks?

I have two kids. They each have a well visit at the pediatrician once a year, dentist appointments twice a year that they go to without me, one has a psychiatrist every three months. Then the random urgent care appointment for strep, maybe twice a year.

NP. Is it possible someone’s life is not just like yours?

I have dc into sports as well. There was a concussion with tons of follow up, a back issue that required an orthopedist, MRI and weekly PT. Plus add derm appts for acne, regular wellness visit, dental. It can add up fast. And if theres an issue, you want to be there as a parent for communication. And some doctors require a parent.

If the person is taking PTO to take kids to appts then the colleague should not be complaining.

I get it. My youngest currently has therapy (biweekly), 2 dentist appointments a year, 2 derm appointments and 2 psychiatrist appointments a year, plus the ophthalmologist and pediatrician annually. That breaks down to 34 or so appointments per year. That’s without injuries and illnesses popping up. I chose to work PT so I could keep 2 days a week free for scheduling his appointments and mine as my job has almost no flexibility in terms of hours. I know that’s not always a possibility, but for me, I have anxiety just asking my boss for time off when an emergency crops up on a workday.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a teen I rode my bike and went to dermatologist, dentist and orthodontist on my own.

We once sent our teen alone to the orthodontist and they called to let us know that wasn’t allowed. I don’t think a parent ever accompanied me to the ortho when I had braces.

I agree - this is a ridiculous suggestion.

+1.

A lot of people on this board have fully grown kids. They love to give advice about what they did in 2001 and are surprised it may not be totally relevant now.

Your supervisor was inappropriate. I also have kids, and we all have doctor, dentist, eye doc appointments, and some also have dermatologist, gynecologist, etc. So that’s like 5 appointments per person over the year. And then sick visits. So maybe 2-4 more, depending on kids’ ages. It easily adds up but guess what? That’s normal. I would frankly just say, I was in an appointment that I took time off for. That’s it. If you have the leave, use it. There are going to be people who don’t believe you should have any sort of life outside of work. You have to set boundaries with them.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a teen I rode my bike and went to dermatologist, dentist and orthodontist on my own.

same, and pt when I had it.

NP. How on earth did this work? Minors can’t sign the paperwork. I doubt my kids’ doctors would even see then if they showed to unaccompanied, for liability reasons, if nothing else.

DP. I don't know but it did. I went to dentist, allergist, and ortho on my own.

In this day and age, you can check them in online with all the paperwork.

That's a bad brag. I had a doctor be really inappropiate with me in college. Zero chance my teens would go on their own. Our otho sees kids on their own. I trust them but I always go back. Same with my dentist who I've seen for years.