Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DD8 plays travel soccer. She is ok. Not the best not the worst. I think if we pushed her more she could move up to the higher level teams. Is it worth it? I see other kids who are definitely pushed by their parents to do more practice individually outside of practice times or have private coaches. Not sure what the end goal is for an 8 year old.

FWIW I played travel everything growing up and loved it but never played in college.

Academics come first in our family however - both DH and I have masters or higher education and were high achievers throughout high school and college. Kids right now are doing very well in school.

Op your post reads like you are judging the families who are "pushing" their kids by questioning the end goal. At the same time, you are seemingly wondering if you should join them. And your line about you and DH and your academics seems weird and competitive.

Reading between the lines, I think you want her to be a superstar and are bummed she doesn't have the drive to do it. But remember.. she is very young. I wouldn't let her quit so she can have sleepovers with her friends but she should be choosing to go all in on a sport, not being forced.

Why wouldn't you let her quit to have sleepovers and free play/hang out time with friends? Why does that have no value anymore? Do you think organized activities trump unorganized or something?

Well specifically re: sleepovers, I personally dislike them and think they aren't really age appropriate for an eight year olds. My kid is very social and has never come home drama free.

I personally would not let my kid do no organized activities to just sit around and have playdates. Sports are good for learning teamwork and getting exercise, and yes, keeping them off screens or out of trouble. If she wanted to do something in lieu of soccer, totally different.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DD8 plays travel soccer. She is ok. Not the best not the worst. I think if we pushed her more she could move up to the higher level teams. Is it worth it? I see other kids who are definitely pushed by their parents to do more practice individually outside of practice times or have private coaches. Not sure what the end goal is for an 8 year old.

FWIW I played travel everything growing up and loved it but never played in college.

Academics come first in our family however - both DH and I have masters or higher education and were high achievers throughout high school and college. Kids right now are doing very well in school.

Op your post reads like you are judging the families who are "pushing" their kids by questioning the end goal. At the same time, you are seemingly wondering if you should join them. And your line about you and DH and your academics seems weird and competitive.

Reading between the lines, I think you want her to be a superstar and are bummed she doesn't have the drive to do it. But remember.. she is very young. I wouldn't let her quit so she can have sleepovers with her friends but she should be choosing to go all in on a sport, not being forced.

Why wouldn't you let her quit to have sleepovers and free play/hang out time with friends? Why does that have no value anymore? Do you think organized activities trump unorganized or something?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DD8 plays travel soccer. She is ok. Not the best not the worst. I think if we pushed her more she could move up to the higher level teams. Is it worth it? I see other kids who are definitely pushed by their parents to do more practice individually outside of practice times or have private coaches. Not sure what the end goal is for an 8 year old.

FWIW I played travel everything growing up and loved it but never played in college.

Academics come first in our family however - both DH and I have masters or higher education and were high achievers throughout high school and college. Kids right now are doing very well in school.

Op your post reads like you are judging the families who are "pushing" their kids by questioning the end goal. At the same time, you are seemingly wondering if you should join them. And your line about you and DH and your academics seems weird and competitive.

Reading between the lines, I think you want her to be a superstar and are bummed she doesn't have the drive to do it. But remember.. she is very young. I wouldn't let her quit so she can have sleepovers with her friends but she should be choosing to go all in on a sport, not being forced.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't push and let her have a life outside of sports

This. My kid's friends who do soccer have no time for anything else, it takes over evenings and weekends. Even though she likes it, I personally would consider dropping it for something less all-consuming. It's important to me that my kid have time for other things.

I agree with you, but it’s kid dependent. If the kid is going to use their free time for truly rejuvenating things (sleeping, socializing, family time, hobbies, roaming around and staring at clouds) that’s fine. But if they are going to be on their phone the whole time, it’s probably better to overschedule them.

As parents we really do have a choice that is not either of unlimited screen time or overscheduling. You can just tell your kid to go be bored until they find out that staring at clouds isn't so bad.

- parent with kids in activities who also stare at clouds and occasionally get screen time

How old are your kids?

Teen, tween, younger ES. So not as young as you're thinking.

LOL. If you don’t think that over scheduling some teens is preferable to letting them “stare at clouds” then you must not have met many teens. Some of them will be staring at the wrong kinds of clouds if you let them get too bored.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure your kids are perfect and would never be tempted to do the wrong thing, but I would expect a mother of three to not be so smug and maybe be smart enough to understand that kids are all different.

So, overscheduling is ok because it might keep kids out of trouble? Don't you think that could also be detrimental?

You’re taking a weird all-or-nothing stance on this. It comes down to knowing your kid. Two of mine can easily occupy themselves in productive (or at a minimum not actively harmful) ways, but the third? Yeah, we’ll keep that kid as busy as we possibly can for as long as we can. If nothing else, the structure is good for this particular child.

Anonymous wrote:DD8 plays travel soccer. She is ok. Not the best not the worst. I think if we pushed her more she could move up to the higher level teams. Is it worth it? I see other kids who are definitely pushed by their parents to do more practice individually outside of practice times or have private coaches. Not sure what the end goal is for an 8 year old.

FWIW I played travel everything growing up and loved it but never played in college.

Academics come first in our family however - both DH and I have masters or higher education and were high achievers throughout high school and college. Kids right now are doing very well in school.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't push and let her have a life outside of sports

This. My kid's friends who do soccer have no time for anything else, it takes over evenings and weekends. Even though she likes it, I personally would consider dropping it for something less all-consuming. It's important to me that my kid have time for other things.

I agree with you, but it’s kid dependent. If the kid is going to use their free time for truly rejuvenating things (sleeping, socializing, family time, hobbies, roaming around and staring at clouds) that’s fine. But if they are going to be on their phone the whole time, it’s probably better to overschedule them.

As parents we really do have a choice that is not either of unlimited screen time or overscheduling. You can just tell your kid to go be bored until they find out that staring at clouds isn't so bad.

- parent with kids in activities who also stare at clouds and occasionally get screen time

How old are your kids?

Teen, tween, younger ES. So not as young as you're thinking.

LOL. If you don’t think that over scheduling some teens is preferable to letting them “stare at clouds” then you must not have met many teens. Some of them will be staring at the wrong kinds of clouds if you let them get too bored.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure your kids are perfect and would never be tempted to do the wrong thing, but I would expect a mother of three to not be so smug and maybe be smart enough to understand that kids are all different.

So, overscheduling is ok because it might keep kids out of trouble? Don't you think that could also be detrimental?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't push and let her have a life outside of sports

This. My kid's friends who do soccer have no time for anything else, it takes over evenings and weekends. Even though she likes it, I personally would consider dropping it for something less all-consuming. It's important to me that my kid have time for other things.

I agree with you, but it’s kid dependent. If the kid is going to use their free time for truly rejuvenating things (sleeping, socializing, family time, hobbies, roaming around and staring at clouds) that’s fine. But if they are going to be on their phone the whole time, it’s probably better to overschedule them.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't push and let her have a life outside of sports

This. My kid's friends who do soccer have no time for anything else, it takes over evenings and weekends. Even though she likes it, I personally would consider dropping it for something less all-consuming. It's important to me that my kid have time for other things.

I agree with you, but it’s kid dependent. If the kid is going to use their free time for truly rejuvenating things (sleeping, socializing, family time, hobbies, roaming around and staring at clouds) that’s fine. But if they are going to be on their phone the whole time, it’s probably better to overschedule them.

As parents we really do have a choice that is not either of unlimited screen time or overscheduling. You can just tell your kid to go be bored until they find out that staring at clouds isn't so bad.

- parent with kids in activities who also stare at clouds and occasionally get screen time

How old are your kids?

Teen, tween, younger ES. So not as young as you're thinking.

LOL. If you don’t think that over scheduling some teens is preferable to letting them “stare at clouds” then you must not have met many teens. Some of them will be staring at the wrong kinds of clouds if you let them get too bored.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure your kids are perfect and would never be tempted to do the wrong thing, but I would expect a mother of three to not be so smug and maybe be smart enough to understand that kids are all different.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't push and let her have a life outside of sports

This. My kid's friends who do soccer have no time for anything else, it takes over evenings and weekends. Even though she likes it, I personally would consider dropping it for something less all-consuming. It's important to me that my kid have time for other things.

I agree with you, but it’s kid dependent. If the kid is going to use their free time for truly rejuvenating things (sleeping, socializing, family time, hobbies, roaming around and staring at clouds) that’s fine. But if they are going to be on their phone the whole time, it’s probably better to overschedule them.

As parents we really do have a choice that is not either of unlimited screen time or overscheduling. You can just tell your kid to go be bored until they find out that staring at clouds isn't so bad.

- parent with kids in activities who also stare at clouds and occasionally get screen time

How old are your kids?

Teen, tween, younger ES. So not as young as you're thinking.

LOL. If you don’t think that over scheduling some teens is preferable to letting them “stare at clouds” then you must not have met many teens. Some of them will be staring at the wrong kinds of clouds if you let them get too bored.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure your kids are perfect and would never be tempted to do the wrong thing, but I would expect a mother of three to not be so smug and maybe be smart enough to understand that kids are all different.

OK sure, fair. My oldest is easy. My youngest will absolutely someday try and find the wrong clouds.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't push and let her have a life outside of sports

This. My kid's friends who do soccer have no time for anything else, it takes over evenings and weekends. Even though she likes it, I personally would consider dropping it for something less all-consuming. It's important to me that my kid have time for other things.

I agree with you, but it’s kid dependent. If the kid is going to use their free time for truly rejuvenating things (sleeping, socializing, family time, hobbies, roaming around and staring at clouds) that’s fine. But if they are going to be on their phone the whole time, it’s probably better to overschedule them.

As parents we really do have a choice that is not either of unlimited screen time or overscheduling. You can just tell your kid to go be bored until they find out that staring at clouds isn't so bad.

- parent with kids in activities who also stare at clouds and occasionally get screen time

How old are your kids?

Teen, tween, younger ES. So not as young as you're thinking.

LOL. If you don’t think that over scheduling some teens is preferable to letting them “stare at clouds” then you must not have met many teens. Some of them will be staring at the wrong kinds of clouds if you let them get too bored.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure your kids are perfect and would never be tempted to do the wrong thing, but I would expect a mother of three to not be so smug and maybe be smart enough to understand that kids are all different.